Serious question:

Use pussy. It's bad, but it's the best of a bad lot.

No. Don't do that, it's tacky. Don't use any euphemisms for the actual organs either

Clunge?

moist tunnel of love

cooter

I would have the characters say it if possible so the choice is a reflection on them, not you.

Rule 1 of writing: If the characters have sex, write about everything but the sex.

Look at Lolita, not once has Nabokov used something like "vagina" or "inside her", it's unnecessary.

This is close to the truth.

Her heat.
Warmth.
Slit.
Sex.

vagoo

soggy paneer

cunny

Vulcanize the whoopee stick
In the ham wallet

Cattle prod the oyster ditch
With the lap rocket

Batter dip the cranny ax
In the gut locker

Retrofit the pudding hatch
With the boink swatter

Marinate the nether rod
In the squish mitten

Power drill the yippee bog
With the dude piston

Pressure wash the quiver bone
In the bitch wrinkle

Cannonball the fiddle cove
With the pork steeple

If I get you in the loop when I make a point to be straight with you then
In lieu of the innuendo in the end know my intent though
I Brazilian wax poetic so pathetically
I don't wanna beat around the bush:
Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo

I second moist towelettes

Kolsti?

>gash
>axe wound

minge

you and me baby ain't nothin but mammals

Puse.

Underrated kek

Axe wound

No he Means no explicit depictions of sex.

It's a matter of tone. I recently read a book where one irreverent character refers to a group of sexual priestesses as 'holy cunts.' The profanity is appropriate here, when it would be risible elsewhere.

Labia, to me, seems a versatile term.

Pubescent area?

> her gap trap
> her lack sack
> her void loin
> her absence appliance
> her empty tendie
> her hole mole
> her negation station
> her lacuna smelling of tuna
> her nOthing that smells of rotting

"Woman has no penis, whatever" - Slavoj Zizkek

Lack crack works as well

Make up your own word for it, then have your characters use it like slang.

feminine penis

"hoo haa"

"mr vagoo"

or

STEAK CAVE

in the second of Robert Anton Wilson's "Schrodinger's Cat" books he pretended to avoid the attention of the censors by using the names of Supreme Court Justices for genitals.

so you'd get a woman shouting "STICK YOUR REHNQUIST IN MY FENSTEIN"

weird part was, by the end of the book it seemed natural.

Dude the proper term got a womans genitals, if your simply referring to the outside is VULVA

if you're looking for vague words for it then use the weird shit in those grandma romance novels about Scottish men being buff and shit.

Target your audience. Sexy part, use sexy words.
Also woman feel different then men for some words. Only use" gross" words if you're appealing to Veeky Forums cucks who hate women.

dohohohohohohoho

This.

Look at Faust, for example. The only place in which it is implied that Faust has sex with Gretchen, is at the end of the bit with the forest/cave, where he says he's going to visit her, and Mephistopheles says something like:

>"You don't mean-"

>writing and actually describing sex

well lump yourself in with the modernists my boy, you're doomed.

innuendo

between her legs, up her skirt, etc.

I don't see what's wrong with this approach. If it's simply narration it seems very appropriate.

Gowl
Gee
Fanny
Clunge
Punani
Myrish swamp

Or make up a sarcastic name that references your discomfort with any of the existing names.

Wizard sleeve

China

OP could you give some context? Can't really choose a euphemism without knowing the general tone/ genre.

Loch

Could you give an example? Are you saying you can imply they had sex, but don't write the actual scene? Or just describe everything around them but the act itself? The moonlight outside, the apartment furniture, etc?

Pizda.

the sex hole

snatch

Her member

Romanian is truly a beautiful language

British-English-fanny

I came to say this

The Weeping Cave

Portal to John Malkovich's head ;)

>this thread
youtube.com/watch?v=UQ6Yf_V_iD0

Like the great comedian Pat Cooper
>envelope

the destroyer of sophisticated society

Seed leech

>basing your own approach to writing sex on a 200 year old play.

My last girlfriend called it her Judy since before I met her. Judy was my Grandmother's name. You should call it what your character who has it, calls it.

It only describes ones specific part of the vagina. It's like referring to a penis as foreskin.

Also don't listen to the people telling you should only vaguely imply sex. The amount of anatomical detail is up to your story's demands, as is how clinical, silly or dirty you want it. Do you really need a word for all of it, or a specific part?

refer it as ''her diary''

Mossy Cottage

I dated a girl who had the same first name as my mom. That was weird.

What you said makes me think, what do girls call their own vagoos? I always think of my penis as "my dick" or sometimes "Little user." Do they think of their vaginas in the same rude lewd terms as men do? My ex called it a "pussy" but she only talked about it when I was supposed to be doing things to it, in the heat of the moment so to speak, and my other ex called it "her cat" but I doubt she always thought of it with cute euphemisms, because she was a tough girl, and very lewd.

Either "A gaping maw of deserting mucous" or "A soft, delicate, and inviting rose," depending upon the narrator. Bonus if you manage to use both in the same paragraph.

Pig's Intestine

Slip'n'Slide

The Deliverator

The Black Maw that Spat You Forth and Will Devour You Anew

>Gowl
>Gee
>Fanny
>Clunge
>Punani
>Myrish swamp
irish as fuck

ayyy he stick is hobs knob to er piss flaps an ey all ad a good time

>inside her
Have you read White Noise?

>8259771
say "he knew her" like in the bible

bloodhound gang

Hoo-ha

Why am I laughing so much

front bottom

pot calling the kettle black

punci

Of course it doesn't feel that way, of course it reads as tasteless to you. It's because you're afraid of women's sexuality like that user said.

because you're dumb?

How did Lovecraft refer to it?

there was no sex in love

t. not read

Her weeping gash.

lips between the hips
minge
muff
fanny
pussy
front-bum
wound
"lady bits"
her flower (if it was made by ed Gein and made out of human pussy)
inverted penis
pouch

Chris?

Perfect post, 10/10.

FAGGOT

Rose Bud is objectively the best. Especially if you know the history behind it.

infinite money on the sims hot date

I went inside her mellow and sweet, V-jay-jay
Dark tunnel for beginners
Moist scented flower
Persepolis
Metropolis
Anal but the front hole actually
Her peepee thingy
Her concupiscence

That's my honest contribution
I would read/10

>schlong-sleeve
>balls-bower
>cum-cauldron
>baby-bestower
>fuck-furrow
>man-mound
>horn-hole
>queef-quince
>penis-pie
>dick-depository
>cock-cupper
>blood-belcher
>period-primer
>fish-feltcher
>semen-soaker
>knob-kneader
>bleeding-burrow
>pink-portal
>sex-slit
>jizz-jug

That should be enough to not be repetitive in your writing, OP.

if you have to refer to it, it's a cunt
but you really shouldn't have to describe the mechanics of the fucking unless that's somehow independently important
did she get kicked in the cunt?
is she just getting fucked? if so, you don't have to point out "in the cunt" you mong

egzblain

>vaginal sex is the only kind

they actual have some talent, more than a lot more serious people.

Nice.