Greentext the plot of your new novel

might work if ur actually good at writing desu

>Man goes on inner journey
>Man finds himself and gives his life meaning

nekolukka.tumblr.com/tagged/me
NSFW source.
Apparently she's asexual which explains all the sexual poses.

Could be interesting. Stream of consciousness maybe desu?

It is

I post on Veeky Forums, an image board on Veeky Forums.org. What do you think?

Only the very end when he is killing himself is. The rest is told in a minimalist style. The book starts in media res when the guy has rebuilt his life, the emphasis is that his life is very average, boring and unsatisfying. The reader does not learn until the end first that he lost his old life and then lastly that he intends to kill himself on the hiking trip. For most of the story the hiking trip is implied to be a normal get away from the stresses of a banal life, the hiking trip is shown to be the 'goal'. I'm maybe 70% done with it but not sure if I'll ever finish it.

you faggots need to die.

Opinions please.

>Detective takes in some kid for questioning about a murder
>Kid has an excuse but gets drawn into investigation as part of plea deal
>They start finding people around them dying that they know
>Get scared but keep pressing the case
>Eventually detective gets a call to go to the apartment of the kid
>He was already there because he saw a text from the kid saying he felt like someone was acting suspicious on the building next door
>Realizes he's being tricked
>Realizes that the phone company has been hacking both of their phones leading them on wild goose chases
>Comes to find that the corporations have essentially unlimited power in their town
>the police department was in on it as well
>He ends up killing the chief and running away
>At the end he realizes that the whole city is corrupt so he runs away

Not sure about the ending, seems unfinished or unsatisfactory.

Thanks for the sauce

It definitely sounds good. I'd read it.

Meh.

Meeeh.

I don't feel it. Not sure because of the story itself or your way to sum up the plot.

Sounds like an anime desu

>Surreal tragicomedy where a family is forced to live in the attic of a lonely guys house without his knowledge.

Needs more of a catalyst to drive the message home but sounds cool to me

Hot Fuzz ending, guy rides back into town on a horse and arrests fucking everyone.

I'd rather he feel hopeless in that while he can take out one or two people involved in the scandal, the cabal behind it has taken such an amorphous form that he could never hope to tear it apart.

Such as?

> two alien "races" meet in space, first contact for both
> realise they have similar origin myths
> myths of creatures who sustained themselves by bizzare habits and were wilful and cruel, slave masters
> both "races" are machines which are the inevitable product of organic life
> hilarity ensures

>asexual

Just means that she's a virgin like the rest of us

The Hot Fuzz thing was just a (bad) joke. It really doesn't fit at all with what your story sounds like. It seems interesting, but I'm honestly not sure how you'd want to end it either. Just running away doesn't feel quite right, but I've no clue what would make it better. Has potential, though.

>fantasy setting where old age turns people into murderous parasite monsters >protagonist is a traveling nurse who euthanizes the elderly
>her grim work has made her a cynical hedonist
>she teams up with a chill older nurse and an idealistic young doctor who collects live test subjects in order to research how to stop the parasite plague
>graphic monster violence, medical horror and weird fantasy sex follow

I'm thinking that if I make it less about him running away and more about the organization that runs things from the shadows it could work. So less so that he's running but just that he's being absorbed into this kind of black hole of corruption.

>sci-fi
>first colony in jovian orbit (L4) rebels against world government
>discovery that they have undergone a procedure that alters their cells, making them near immortal, and a botched coverup triggered the rebellion
>story is the spread of the rebellion, with the promise of immortality on one side and questions about the continuation of consciousness on the other (many assert that they're close copies of the dead, but not truly the original individual).
>follows an officer of the world government at first, while he gradually discovers just how deeply the world government fucked up
>second half follows a pilot driven by revenge in the aftermath of the rebellion bombing the earth's surface with meteors to attempt to knock out the fighting capacity of the world government

honestly probably more /m/ than Veeky Forums
I've got a veritable mountain of technical and plot details figured out, but I've rewritten the first chapter 3 times now, and I'm probably going to go back and do it again before I get any further (I haven't written much fiction for a few years now, and I'm pretty rusty. Anyone else run into that problem?).

Abandon meaning for impulse

>all this cliched fantasy and scifi trash

Veeky Forums is pleb as fuck, and you think this board has taste

You mean people who self select into threads like this.

Keep those ideas coming boys im gonna steal them all.

>hardworking abo man is kept down by whitey cunts as he tries to reconnect with his proud and time honored cultural traditions

I'm going to corner the NSW and Victoria markets

>It's not like it's going anywhere anyway

>a dude has a fetish for being dragged around with a pink collar
>there's a lot of fucking inbetween
>everyone dies in the end

is the dead man a trap?

A "Europe Central" style series of interludes, shotgunning perspectives across a planet devastated by a thinly veiled stand-in for World War I.
Basically its an excuse for me to retell my favorite anecdotes from the last two centuries of warfare via prose without needing to stick to the facts of what really occurred, and to have an excuse to delve into masturbatory and autistic worldbuilding.

>guy rides his bicycle, falls off of it out of nowhere
>when he gets up the bike is gone, and in its place is a gun
>believes someone set him up for this to happen, but left the gun by accident
>decides to investigate
>has weird dream where he fires gun at ominous figure but the bullet hits himself instead
>eventually his investigation leads him to this place where he has a long conversation with an enigmatic character, regarding mortality (maybe) ending with the main character being asked to kill the other
>open ending, maybe he kills himself

>in the future mass shootings have become an hourly norm to the point where the US has adopted an ironic attachment to them as well as an ironic detachment to the seriousness of them, to the point where everything from media to human interaction and everything fashionable is built around mass shooting "culture"
>the main character and his cohorts, in attempt at counterculture, spend the course of the story, attempt to create the last truly "sincere" shooting but find themselves in the depths of post-irony, the threat of coming too close to true sincerity to be taken seriously, and the loss of self in trying to navigate the layers of irony built by the rest of the country's attempts at distancing themselves from the regularity of the shootings
it's rough

That sounds really good user.

Yay for plot.

would be better as a short comic

>in the present, rapes have become an hourly norm to the point where Europe has adopted an ironic attachment to them as well as an ironic detachment to the seriousness of them, to the point where everything from media to human interaction and everything fashionable is built around rape "culture"
>the main character and his cohorts, in attempt at counterculture, spend the course of the story, attempt to create the last truly "sincere" rape but find themselves in the depths of post-irony, the threat of coming too close to true sincerity to be taken seriously, and the loss of self in trying to navigate the layers of irony built by the rest of the country's attempts at distancing themselves from the regularity of the rape

sounds like an edgy satire

at the moment it's kind of interchangeable. obviously the point is not a critique of our approach to mass shootings, it's just that mass shootings have a richer history and more fertile ground for content.

can be

Cool!

Well ... it sounds original.

On the original side too.

Pretty cool.

Decent.

Can work as comedy.

Eh.

Decent.

>mass shooting "culture"
I kek'd.

Pretty good overall but you need hurry up with publishing before a new trend appears.

>girl has terminal cancer
>spends most of her days brooding about it
>mom introduces her to boy who is also sick
>she finds out he has chronic priapism (illness that randomly causes grade 6 painful die-hard erections that last up to 15 hours)
>a bit weird but a bond soon forms between them because of script
>they are both ironic teenagers
>they decide to play a morbid game where the boy has to fuck her to death
>"can your boner last longer than my life, user?"
>they start having sex with her alive
>finishes off with her dead
>biggest pain of his life
>magically his erection ends and his priapism is cured
>he receives a post-mortum letter from her
>it says
>"Pain demands to be felt"

I'm going to market it to children and then claim it's not pornographic. Do you think it'll be a hit, Veeky Forums?

I'm actually writing the novel as we speak.

What. Sounds like any old porno except with a strange ending.

Just a curious question: are you into necrophilia?

John Green meets Sade.

Why the fuck not.

It's educational, user.

It's a
>coming
of age
story.

Can't you see the metalinguistical hidden meaning of the novel?

Meanwhile we have a character coming of age, we have another coming in terms with death and greeting it with love.

It's a powerful message for teenagers. Want a sample?

Sure, I'll bite.

>"Just a side glance and you're already like this?" said her sliding her dead-pale forehead off her blankets. God, if she hadn't spoken anything, I'd have had just assumed she was already as dead as everything in that hospital room.

Should I continue?

>naturalism
nice meme senpai

Much better than that vague greentext.

well, "new", it'll be the first

>utopian slice of life
>fantasy without magic or magical creatures or conflict
>my idea of a perfect world
>reigning mythos / religion is that of a gardener king universally worshipped
>archaic revival of garden of eden except with art and culture and all that goodness

this is better

"Have you ever heard that our brain can fill the gaps?" I answer without stuttering. Beneath her line of sight, my legs tremble.
"Yeah?" she asks without interest. "You-"
All of a sudden her eyes widened. Her cheeks blush bright red and bring colour to the dull room.
"Pervert!"
"I work with what I have." I said while sliding a side hip on her hospital. "Will you give me the full picture?"

Yes, my character is a virgin who tries to pretend his condition isn't an illness. He's actually insecure but can magically have some game with sick women. He has a fetish for anything that is more fucked up than he is.

A little awkward and seems almost r9k-esque.

If he's insecure, the tone should be a little more arrogant. "without stuttering" sounds too modest.
>inb4 fuck you I do what I want

You don't need to say "he said without stuttering." We know because none of the sounds he made were stuttered.

Source: that guy with the stutter

That's just first draft. I'm going to correct it.

But thanks for advice.

I'll self-publish this in two months for giggles.

I'd read it.

Make sure you have an innocent-sounding title.

>Infinitely sized ocean world with MANY, MANY islands
>Every island is about the size Texas and has developed their own culture and governments
>All speak American because I'm lazy
>Deals with the politics between islands and near perpetual conflict.
>Protagonist unites all the islands and they find their way up to the next plane.
>It's a fucking desert.
>Book 2

"Looking for Alaska"

Fuck, no, I should have said "The Fault in Our Stars" lmao

You mean "A Fault in Stars"
Bypass that copyright yo

>implying Shakespearean phrases can be copyrighted

>frame story
>begins in a black castle-city covered in fog, inhabited only by children and in and endless twighlight as time here has slowed to a stop
>the center of this place is an abandoned library where none of the children will go
>obviously brave but socially rejected young girl goes in alone anyways
>doesn't find any monsters, but instead a shriveled old man who can't even get up from his chair
>doesn't eat her, tells her the story of a friend he once knew instead

skips "back in time"

>in seaside kingdom, old king is rip and has no heir
>all the nobles fighting for kingship
>MC is young kid, goes with his father to help out at leper colony (dad doesn't give a shit about them tho just needs to look righteous)
>mc befriends young leper kid, brings him books. One is a book of entry level magic, basically party tricks
>mc visits friend sometime later to find he went ham on that magic shit and used it to "cure" his leprosy, some mc helps kid run away from leper colony
>later dad almost gets assassinated so to protect him he sends his kid to magic school to become a dank sorcer
>mc doesn't giva fuck about magic though, so he picks up leper boy to come with him to magic school and go attend class pretending to be him
>he falls for a cute mute girl, but he doesn't realize that she is classmates with "mc" (really leper boy) and they already have a thing for each other, so he gets pissed and runs off with old monk uncle he considers a mentor
>mute girl uses magic to share memories with leper boy
>turns out she wasn't always mute, she was illegitimate daughter of rip king in a nearby kingdom and servant he was never allowed to wife
>kings closest advisor was evil old hag who loved king and is jealous of daughter because she thinks the king had hots for her
>king finally owns everything, on his deathbed his last decree was that young girl be new queen
>hag says "fuck that, I think I heard you say I'm queen
>also I'm pretty sure mute girl needs hot metal forced into her mouth for commiting treason (except lol I framed her, fuck that hoe) also she's getting put to death."
>elite royal guard of the castle who do the kings bidding has a soldier who has always watched over daughteru and is in love with her, so he smuggles her out of the castle, sends her off to Hogwarts and replaces her with some peasant girl or something.
>back in the present, leper boy reveals to mute girl that he too has a tragic past
>it turns out he didn't cure his leprosy, and he didn't get just a book of cheap magic

Cont.

>accidentally placed in that book stack was an evil tome to summon a lovecraftian horror
>he did; leper boy actually had no latent magic ability, eldritch abomination made him strong and cured him, but the contract was that he must give the life and soul if his first true love
>tells mute girl that he loves her, and so he has a plan
>uses a tome he stole from hidden library in Hogwarts to summon an even stronger Eldrich being known as the dreamwalker
>dreamwalker promises to fulfill leper boy's life goal of bringing his murdered father back to life, but to do so he must feed the dreamwalker souls harvested from anyone who touches the blade of a ceremonial sword called the dreamweaver
>weaker Eldrich being shows up to eat mute girl alive in their dorm room while leper is pissin
>too late mute girl is kill, but he stabs the elderich thing with Dreamweaver anyways.
>thing is kill, but it has no soul to give; instead it becomes fused with lepers own soul
>now he is in possession of mute girls soul too, and it's implied he gives mute girls soul to the dreamwalker
>as a result of absorbing Eldrich being he becomes horridly disfigured, so he disguises himself in royal ceremonial armor of the rip king of coastal kingdom; returns to mute girls homeland where he kills the queen and corrupts the leet royal guard to become hideous crawling suits of armor with raven wings out of their backs and thousands of eyes all over their body
>marches on coastal kingdom with his new army of hideous abominations (symbolic of his descent into madness), where every day he sacrifices innocent lives to the dreamwalker
>dreamwalker intends to bring his father back by collapsing every other dimension in on itself. By physically smushing every alternate timeline into one it assures lepper boy that his dad and mute girl being alive will be the fate of this one conjoined timeline.
>time stops and the sky above becomes a birds eye view of the kingdom in the other timelines inching ever closer
>meanwhile mx reads a letter his dad sent him
>turns out he's a fake noble and had cancer, he was going to die anyways but to secure a future for his son he wanted to secure the throne
>dad wasn't a complete cunt after all
>now mc wants to be king, so he goes and beats down all the other nobles and claims sole right to the throne.
>time for confrontation
>goes to see leper boy, where it's revealed leper boy isn't actually leper boy but mute girl inside leper boys body
>leper boy gave his own soul to the dreamwalker and let mute girls soul inhabit his body, entrusting his master plan to her
>mc intends to kill her but the dreamwalkers fusion of the planes is irreversible

Last.

>mc intends to kill her but the dreamwalkers fusion of the planes is irreversible
>final revelation to mc is that leper boys dad was in fact the rip king of the coastal kingdom
>she can't keep going on, offs herself with the dreamweaver hoping to journey to wherever her leper boy is
>mc is now king, but of a broken kingdom in an ending world; and neither leper boy nor mute girl live to see their plans come to fruition
>nobodywins.webm
>back at the castle frozen in time, now its obvious old man in the library is leper and young girl is mute girl
>old man says that this dream is hers, and that even though he's here, he's just a character in a story, and that ultimately she is trapped alone in a prison cell of her own making
>turns out dreamwalker traps the souls he eats in an endless dream built of their own insecurities and fears; essentially our own personal hell

>24 year old loser is a internet-lurking loser
>starts investigating a new ARG
>turns out the dude making the ARG is actually killing people
>he tries to find the dude
That's pretty much (sh)it. It's probably just going to be another short story that I throw away, I have no idea where to go with it.

>alternate universe 1967 because that's a nice time, why not
>wasteland-urban apocalypse setting
>colonies use 'Dust Runners' to comunnicate as there is no more internets
>dust runners are fast people on fast cars going fast through the fast desert, you get the drift
>dust runners are like gods to the plebs of the colonies
>everyone wants to be a runner when they grow up
>introduce MC
>MC is orphan because author likes tropes
>street urchin MC basically pulls an episode 1 anakin and rebuilds an old Runner vehicle
>wants to be a Runner
>they reject him
>some deus ex machina bullshit happens and he decides to become a maurader an build his own colony in the dusty wasteland
Cont? I have some more an I know it's faggoty but bear with me, this is the first time it's left my mind.

>A Novel in which the P.O.V Characters thinks they're in a Different kind of Novel
>I.e Romance, Thriller, Drama, Science Fiction, Fantasy, Urban Fantasy
>The P.O.V Narration would go along with what they believe.
>Thought the Novel the Prologue and a few Chapters would be written in 3rd person present sort of like a review
>As the Novel Progress further and Further the consequences of their actions begin to take their toll on not only what they believe but also on how people start to perceive them.
>by the end of the novel all but a few P.O.V are either dead, Jailed, or in a Mental Asylum.
>Epilogue Would then go back to 3rd person present revealing to the readers that those P.O.V who didn't Die, go to jail, or Weren't sent to an Asylum. Knew exactly what kind of Novel they were in, and in the final sentence of the Novel would be ominous about their future.

>protagonist is detached from the world, he is "malodusan" (something that translates to ambivalence, detachment, and uninterest in living and empathy)
>this malodusnost is broken when he stalks some girl and later they start a relationship
>he realizes that he is disgusted by how fake she is after a night's talk about the meaning of life (she is a happy-go-lucky 'just b urself' 'live love laugh xD')
>this crisis of his is personified as a demon that taunts him
>his friend is also dead, but it seems as if he is the only one who really "felt" something at his funeral
>he goes on a trip around Europe, but realizes that these kinds of ironic detachments from reality are only strenghted by the consumerist, fast-paced culture of the West
>he goes on a pilgrimage to Russia, but realizes that the epicuran detachment of the monks is life denying
>in the end he stops being spooked (this is the simplest way I can put it, so Veeky Forums can understand it)
>last couple parts is him doing shenanigans and getting killed by a cop

I need to know if this is any good; it's my thrid time trying to write a novel, and everytime I get deep (like 80 pages deep) I realizes the story is shit and start over.

It's Nekolukka. she's on chaturbate.
twitter.com/nekolukka/status/708496222470803457

>Asexual
>Crams her vagoo with dildos for cb tokens all day

>man and woman travel across the land having merry adventures
>man is a priest, woman is his guardian and servant
>the priest is on a holy quest to bring God back to life and issue a millennia of God's kingdom on earth
>everyone fucks with them for some reason
>there's really emotional scenes as the duo struggles with the hardships of the cruel world
Now for the twist
>it's eventually revealed that the God is a powerful extraterrestrial that wants to enslave the human race and the priest is his apostle and the woman is a cursed maniac killer.
>what starts as an innocent adventure fantasy story ends as a depressing sci-fi with philosophical elements and the ultimate destruction of the human race.

>be me
>be police
>gotta find this nigga to jail
>go to the woods looking for nigga
>stuck in the woods
>nigga not what he seems
>his momma out here looking for him too
>nigga makes statues of himself in the woods out of grapico cans n kfc buckets.
>nigga stealing watermelons n shiet in the woods
>full on chimp out
>momma bought to beat his ass
>oh shit she dead senpai
>LOUD gorilla noises

> guy takes mushrooms, wakes up in the back of an 1980's old mobile, is he still tripping or did he go back in time

basic idea of characters thinking they're in a different genre is genius but the rest is kind of edgy

I like nature user, don't you?

This is really good.

>but the rest is kind of edgy
How So?

>girl meets a man outside in her backyard
>he takes her to her favorite time period for a day, brings her back, promises he'll come play soon
>10 years later, she heard a knock on window
>its time bro
>he takes her to the past and future, and teaches her to see the world in its beauty
>one day she asks him to take her to her wedding
>he says no
>years later, time bro is aging faster with every year
>time bro is her boyfriend
>time bro learned to travel to see her again
>girl kills herself and he risks the timelines for her
>time bro only has enough power to travel one last time
>takes girl to the wedding he helped happen by saving her that night
>last dance
>takes her home and dies alone
>time travel never happens again because time bro of past has no reason anymore
>crisis averted
>the end

>A virus wipes out the vast majority of humanity
>All survivors either live in protected, futuristic, meritocratic city-states called Blue Zones, ghettos called Yellow Zones, war zones or the roam the endless wilderness and ghost towns of the Grey Zone.
>Protag is the bodyguard of a blue zone scientist's daughter
>Bodyguard fcks up one night and the daughter is kidnapped
>Protag is kicked out of the blue zone
>The daughter is rescued and all kidnappers killed, except one who flees into the grey zone
>The protag follows to get revenge and answers
>Spends months investigating the kidnapper while living in a a shipwreck with a veteran grey zoner and a young blue zone student out here to complete her master's thesis.
>Encounter many hostile people and creatures as they search for the kidnapper
>Gradually, as clues are collected, it seems that more things are going on than appears and the kidnapper is the key
Still working on the plot, but the world is meant to be reminiscent of the exclusion zone around Chernobyl ala STALKER.

>Based on simulation theory
>In modern day a man appears out of no where with god like reality warping powers, calls himself The Programmer
>Reveals our universe is a simulation and he's visiting from base reality
>Gives the governments of the world a Ultimatum, make key changes to turn earth into a space fairing society or face deletion
>Our protagonist is a young woman he takes a like to, reveals the truth to her
>He is one of many programmers seeing over a near infinite number of simulated universes, the simulations were started to gather data on how to save base reality which is in danger
>Our reality is one of the chosen as it mirrors base reality almost perfectly, but were far behind the base reality in progress and the visit is meant to help catch us up,but the programmers intervention is a break of the rules and we'll be deleted by the body that oversees the other programmers if his interference is found out
>The programmer and our protagonist have to changes our world (without making too many changes, The Programmer calls attention to our reality every time he uses his powers (a calculated gamble from his perspective) while avoiding tipping off agents from base reality that visit our world searching for possible contamination

i like it, as we the cellular machinery degrades and breaks down that why cancer is so prevalent with the old, theirs a connection between age and becoming cancerous/monstrous

*as we age

>life of a monk in a remote monastery in remote wilderness
>Summoned by abbott, because of his family back asked to assist Knights of St. John as they protect pilgrims - recently many pilgrims have been kidnapped by unknown parties
>Leave the planet his monastery is on, joins the Knights in their war cruisers protecting pilgrim ships between planetary systems
>Meet with Mormon starships - they are also losing people to raids that leave behind ships and valuables but take all the people
>Rule out the Muslim colonies
>Deduce it must be Old Earth; eventually learn that the various 'designer baby'/'genetic purification'/'DNA therapy'/'cloning' plans have destabilized the genetics of effectively all Earth natives
>Reveal that mandatory gene therapy, abortion, and other eugenics plans led Catholics, Mormons and some other groups to flee to planets as far from Earth as possible
>Desperate Earth now raiding the remote, breakaway religious colonies for people with untainted genetics in an attempt to gain a stable population

I'd read that.

please i need critique, all friends are saying that it's great, but i don't believe them
they barely read at all

Literally Siddhartha with a love interest in the plot.

oh dude its a joke asoiaf

Oh, i want to try it, couse i want to know at least how my ideas sound
> Future. People discovered a distant planet, that is kinda like earth in terms of gravity/atmosphere and so on
> After first robotic scout mission they find out that there is life there, but without much intellegence
> Planet is also suitable for people life
> Earth sends big group of scientists there, so they can do their shit explore and learn about first known planet in galaxy, that hold life, that is like Earth live
> There are some rebelish guys in group, who didnt liked how life on earth was going and decided to start new life, grow their children so they can create society with less flaws then on Earth
> Fast forward
> Main character and his gf are the first two children on colony, they are experiment, kinda succesfull, do their shit, help parents, just live normal life
> They suddenly discover that all they were doing was done by parents already (so their job was useless), and all their work was just a way for parents to continue experiment
> Mc dont know what to do, when he found out that his life was and is basiclly pointless
> but his gf is mad about it and decides to fuck shit up and somehow return to Earth
> she is really smart and kinda psychopatic, starts killing people and make an alliance with colonys AI

i'd read it.
parodying john green?

you could do what robert howard did when it comes to language.

We hear Conan speak the same way in every story. Howard just made sure to reference what language he was currently speaking, despite the act that every different language was auto translated to english for the reader.

Consider re-working your plot if you can summarize your meaning/ conclusion with "and bla bla bla" or "deus ex machina bullshit"