Tfw no Donna Tartt gf

>tfw no Donna Tartt gf
>tfw I'm dating a retard who works at a clothing store and watches America's Got Talent

Just be happy you have someone at all

Thats nice of you to date someone with down syndrome

but does she have big tits?

>and watches America's Got Talent
I have wasted more time with AGT and BGT that I'm proud of.
Sometimes when it's late at night I like to watch bad auditions, to see people fail at their dreams and feel better about myself. Other times it may give me a laugh.

Learn to love, user, or try again.

it's even funnier when you think about the fact that some take these shows as their one only chance of realising their dream singing career. Like, you're relying on a rigged show to get you a professional career lmao

She hasn't at least read Harry Potter and LOTR?

yeah
I saw a pretty good singer on youtube who asked to be on agt. Probably most people who make it were asked to be there in the first place.

>Donna Tartt
she's got a "BEE was here" tramp stamp

DON'T SAY THAT

AND IF YOU CANT BE WITH THE ONE YOU LOVE
HONEY, LOVE THE ONE YOURE WITH

One would have loved to film her fart.

DELETE THIS

Op dump her and try again

Just imagine, that dirty bitch was blasting real farts in James Joyce's fucking face. This isn't some playtime shit where she was daintily farting while all dressed up, and Joyce would classily jerk off under a blanket or something. She was sweaty and dirty, with shit speckled on her asshole, leaning over some couch and spreading her cheeks clumsily with one hand. Really straining to blast Joyce right in the goddamn face with an actual ass full of farts.

Well, she wasn't that bad looking.

I think you mean arse.

>hating on AGT

I like the random weirdos and carnies who show up, like the guy this year who swings a barbell around through a hook in his nose. It's like the last remnant of vaudeville.

When isn't their shit speckled on their assholes? Maybe I need to find a better class of women.

>he's seen a girl's asshole

H-how?

An arousing mix of Audrey Horne and Scarlett Johannson. She wrote, you say?

>sometimes when it's late at night I like to watch bad auditions, to see people fail at their dreams

says every person who watches this shit as if it were a legitimate excuse

I have been in love with this woman since the first pic I saw of her.

What really disturbed me was seeing how much botox/plastic surgery she has done. Her forhead is frozen, and expressionless. Look at her past videos and you'll see how expressive she was with her eyes, forehead, and brow. Yes, they were getting wrinkled, but it was beautiful. Now it's a frozen wasteland.

that's their daughter
(unless that's the joke, gross)

>He actually has women who enjoys his company at all

Yeah, life must be tough OP.

>LOTR
Id say more The Hobbit mfw gf has Smaug tattoo

I have legitimately lost interest and attraction to all females in my life. I hooked up with this one girl a couple weeks ago and I could barely keep it up while she was sucking me off because I just wasn't into it and was completely fucking at odds with everything about her philosophical and political/social views she was just so fucking wrong about everything.

Asking the important questions

is this how we summon butters

you're gay dude

>not always taking a pre-game shower as foreplay

doggy style, my man. its right in your face wafting stink at you