How to be subtle in mocking?

How to be subtle in mocking?
My chad brother died recently. I didn't care. He was 4 years older than me and treated me like shit, just like my whole family. However, I have been asked to give a eulogy at his funeral. I cannot refuse without seeming like a monster, so I have agreed and prepared a short Eulogy. I am attempting to make it passive aggressive and I wish to use the moment to expose how poorly my brother treated me. Do you think this is a wise idea? I am hoping to tell a story that makes me look sympathetic and makes people feel bad for even attending his funeral, however, I don't want it to seem intentional. So far I have 2 pages written. I would like advise on what more you think I can say. I also ask for advise on how to be more subtle

No. Assuming this isnt bait, this is a horrible idea and will further alienate you from your family. Say something generic about how you didnt always see eye to eye but he was there when you needed him etc etc.

b8 is too obvious. Your post was enough to make me think you could be a sperg, but then the eulogy took it too far, way too fast. 3/10

Don't fucking do it. The funeral is about your brother's memory. Not your petty insecurities. Grow the fuck up and stop being so self-absorbed. I hope you are baiting right now.

Is this serious? It's his funeral, there is no way in hell you'll be able to convince people he's an asshole and to feel bad for you, do you legit have autism or lack of emotional understanding or something?

Basically, by being a little bitch and not confronting him about how he treated you or confronting your parents about it you've already missed your chance at any kind of redemption.

If you're being serious then say you aren't going to do the eulogy.

Holy shit what was the original story behind that image? Was it originally designed as bait, or was it real?

10/10 bait, got a good chuckle out of me.

>(look at mum but not dad to sew doubt)
Nice touch. I suggest going into more detail about the masturbatory moaning noises

Don't mention you masturbating while your brother got laid. If you actually do speak this it a funeral it won't make people feel sympathetic, just confused.

Just wear a fedora and get somebody to record it

ya big autistic fanny

I assume the true bait is the people pretending to take this seriously.

You're going to talk about masturbating in a eulogy for your dead brother?

Do it OP. Show em all

Phenomenal bait ®

This. It's enough to be the good guy in your own mind, the others won't recognise you as such anyway.

>mfw this thread

it is a joke for them to laugh at so they don't realise I am destroying him

6/10, I replied.

Do it

pls b real

lmao this is why you have no gf homes


I actually did have to give a eulogy for my brother and it fucking sucked. haven't re-read it since but see the file sitting in my dropbox often. I wish they didn't make me do it. I was in a fugue state of sorts for the 2-3 months after the fact, let alone the week of.

post it

drop the bit about the ps4 and christmas dinner, too ham handed. shorten the part about your arm breaking.

and it's sow as in planting and not sew as in sewing

You're destroying yourself there, buddy

You seem like a bitter, entitled kid who hated your brother because he called u out on your autistic personality and gave you shit for it

I had two brothers and they beat the absolute shit out of me until hit my growth spurt and could actually fight back. Time went on. I still sort of resent them for it, but we're pretty close now.

I would not ever call my brothers out for what they did to me in front of my parents and all their friends, especially at their funeral, especially while giving their eulogy.

Don't give the eulogy OP. You don't have the emotional maturity to do what's right let alone the verbal skills to pull this off.

You really took the time out of your life to type this?