Main character is a writer

>main character is a writer

I just picked up this shitty Lovecraft spin off thing that does this.

It says its heavily influenced and based off HPs shit. The main character is a female writer whos a pseudo nerd/basement dweller. And the actual author, who is male, describes people as dude.
I couldnt get past like 8 pages

>Main character's name is the same as the author's

>the first female character the main character meets is the love interest

The Shining
It
Misery
'Salem's Lot
Bag of Bones
11/22/63
Various short stories.

>main character is an introspective asian male who has "excellent" taste in music and liquor but in case you didn't notice the author will be sure to mention repeatedly throughout the rest of the book, and this character will without a doubt have some sort of sex with another prominent female character that will be written in the most cringe worthy fashion possible

GO TO BED TAO
O

T
O

B
E
D

T
A
O

>The monster is too horrible to be comprehended by our senses

>main characters start laughing in a time of crisis

>Main character is Jesus

>The monster is pale, has no eyes / has black pits for eyes, and an impossibly giant smile

>The main character is told there are powers beyond him that control him and that he cannot understand.

>the book has nonstop flashbacks

Check'd

>main character is the chosen one

>Jesus is a character and the book isn't a part of the Bible or Quran

>main character is too old for another adventure

>Jesus Christ isn't the main characters lord and savior

Is Dante the biggest hack of all time?

my twisted world?

I'm guessing he meant Murakami but you're actually right too

kek

>protagonist doesn't get involved in multiple fights

>that's the joke

I dunno, I thought pic related was pretty good

been reading my diary again, desu?

Are you kidding me? Do you actually think Eliot had "some sort of sex with another prominent female character"? Stupid normie tripfag. I bet you think /r9k/ is satire too.