Holy fucking shit Veeky Forums

Guys I need advice
I started taking SSRI, my mind is finally free of depression and I got my imagination back, I've been traveling between all kind of forms and movements inside my own headspace for hours.
Also, my reading speed and comprension have improved.
Is this what sinapsis feels like?
I want to make up for all the time I wasted being foggy, suicidal and sad.
What math and physics books do you rec?
>inb4 start with the greeks
Sorry for my bad english.

you're damaged goods. It will wear off within the next 2 weeks and you can go back to being inert, occasionally jacking it to cartoons.

Please no

Seriously Veeky Forums, are depression meds a good idea? I'm so torn on the idea

First I had a pretty heavy panic attack, but then I started to feel good, is like my mind fucking actually works instead of being all rotten and over the place.
My thought pattern didnt stop being pessimistic but it doest fuck with my mood now.
This is heaven, I really hope the other user isnt right, I cant go back to hell.

It's quite literally trial and error.
No one can really tell you. For most people, they won't do much, but they easily make things better or worse for you depending on how your shit is working and how you interpret it.
Either way meditation and hypnosis are much more effective in the long run and have less negative effects so long as you don't get into sissy hypno.
I take buproprion, it's harmless and helps me get shit done. Don't expect effects right away and be honest with your psychiatrist.
If you get pills from a family doctor, do not take them. Literally just asking for trouble then.

Also take bupronin, used to take two tablets a day but I was cut down to one after it gave me the most fucked up dreams I've ever had

got this with lexapro, but i quite liked them.

id just like to counter the above user by vouching for sissy hypno
If that's where your mind takes you, follow it to happiness, just post some pics ok

Keep taking them. You will have some ups and downs down the road, but ignore them.
SSRI are a blessing. Seriously.
Some might say "stop depending on drugs," but it's not like that. Would you tell the same thing to a diabetic about their insulin? It's simply something your mind needs. That's the end of it.
Godspeed, user. You'll be fine.

fpbp

No they are fucking not. Sent me careening into two years of withdrawal. Legit destroyed my life and the lives of countless others. Pregabalin, SSRI's, and benzos, ESPECIALLY benzos will fucking kill you by making you kill yourself. My skin was on fire the whole time.
I recommend reading PDR guidelines and MERC manuals to see all the fucked up shit they've caused, and why the FDA is constantly steping in to destroy these drugs. Get out now.

>buproprion
made me suicidal and caused severe shaking

It's a trial and error thing. If they didn't work on you it's a good thing you moved away from them, but that doesn't seem to be OP's case

Actually on both bupronion and lexapro, the dreams could be awesome but I they started draining of my energy during the day; I realized I wasn't getting any real rest during my sleep and it was affecting my ability to concentrate. And when the dreams got dark they got gut-wrenchingly vivid and personal.

He's correct, been there myself

You are correct, but what few people realize is that it's like playing Russian roulette, and about 25% of the population doctors indiscriminately throw these compounds at will have disastrous adverse reactions that leads to death or permanent damage. What needs to be done is more research on determining a treatment candidate's chances of success, but drug lobbyists have destroyed the credibility of that research method because it would take an enormous chunk out of their market. It's fucking evil.

Also this . Your brain's threshold for tolerance shifts after a while and nothing works forever. If you dodged a devastating withdrawal reaction from one drug, chances are you're going to step on a landmine with the next one. The MOAs of these drugs is unknown, along with their permanent effects on cognition, cancer risk, and endocrine function.

You probably took these not suffering from the disorder they're meant to treat. If you have a lack of serotonin in the brain, SSRIs are meant to treat that. If you're just thinking you're clinically depressed because of bad habits or over-thinking your current life, SSRIs are definitely a bad idea. The drugs are fine, it's you and your doctor that aren't cognizant enough of your needs, and that's not the drug's fault.

t. Pfizer

Who?

wtf i hate capitalism now

>sissy hypno
I thought we weren't allowed to talk about it

Can you faggot start rec'ing books and not porn?

Serious shilling itt

What the hell is sinapsis?

I've tried SSRIs, SNRIs and bupropion and I'm still the same depressed wreck void of any willpower.

In fact, I didn't react to them at all in any way. If I had eaten mints instead at least I would've had a non-stinky breath. What gives?

Same here mate. The serotonin deficiency hypothesis of depression is bullshit

Depression is just a reaction to the shitty world around us, so yeah.

It's a common misconception. The serotonin deficiency hypothesis is correct, but is more or less also correct. Recursive negative thought patterns caused by the shitty world around us physically causes the serotonin deficiency. Medication is a messy crutch for alleviating the symptoms without addressing the underlying issue, and with a ton of side effects. Barbara Arrowsmith-Young's books provide a good example of how cognitive behaviour can literally change the physical structure of the brain.

Synapse

I dont know mate
I feel alive again, my mind actually works, I got basic human energy back
I guess they just dont work for some people
Is not always a reaction

Dude the drugs are the same. It's not like family doctors prescribe drugs of a lower quality. There's basically two first line choices for pharmaceutical treatment of depression, sertraline and fluoxetine. That's what you'll most probably be started on by either your doctor or a psychiatrist. I mean by all means see a psychiatrist as they're the ones who really know the stuff. But just saying both docs will just be following standard treatment guidelines.
I took sertraline for a while a couple of years ago and it seemed to get me out of a ditch just to get me doing things again. Think of antidepressants like the wedge you need to chip you out of the sandpit. Of course everyone's experience varies. I did find the side effects pretty horrible for the first couple of days but then it was fine.

>However, the Arrowsmith Program has been criticized by several neuroscientists, psychologists and cognitive scientists, including Anne Castles, Max Coltheart, Emma Burrows and Linda Siegel, for basing its claims on anecdotal evidence. They have noted that there have been no peer-reviewed studies published which use randomized controlled trials to evaluate whether it is actually more effective than any other "brain training" programs.[7][8][9][10][11]

Have fun with the withdrawals!

When I started taking SSRIs my dick stopped working and I couldnt be bothered to read, and when I did read, I couldnt internalize or analyze text. I just didnt care.

I stopped taking them.

Do you know calculus/linear algebra/entry-level undergraduate math?

If not, do the MIT OpenCourseWare on single variable calculus, multivariable calculus and linear algebra and then study study Walter Rudin's "Principles of Mathematical Analysis".

If you already know that stuff, read Rudin directly.

Underrated, i lol'd user you're a funny dude I hope you're not depressed

This my man. In the long term, drugs help me get out of bed and shower, but that's it.

Just take tryptophan supplements every day. It has a minor anti-depressant effect but without all the fucked-up side effects

Well not anymore because I'm taking pills but everyone itt are such downers I might have to double the dose

>benzos
Theres your problem
Literally nothing wrong with SSRI

There's a market for personalised medicine, it's just only among the rich, it will eventually become easy enough to do that it will become progitable to do for everybody but that day is something like 20 years away.

t. Biochemist

wtf i love comunism now

OP you should read Diary of a Drug Fiend by Alisteir Crowley, you may find something in it that will help you for the long run.

>What math and physics books do you rec?
Take OCW classes, 18.01, 18.02, 18.03, 18.06. These are your maths, calc 1, calc 2, differential eq, linear algebra. For physics, 8.01 and 8.02. This are your basic mechanics and electromagnetic physics classes. With those, you'll have the foundation to pursue your own interests in more advanced classes.

And keep taking meds. The high might wear off, but your baseline will still be a little higher. The rest is up to you.

They can be very useful short term. Got me out of a mental rut I had been stuck in for a while. Withdrawal really sucks btw. Brain zaps and nausea for a full week at least

Aleister*

>You probably took these not suffering from the disorder they're meant to treat.
False. Diagnosed with anxiety and depression, which is what they are "designed" to treat.
>If you have a lack of serotonin in the brain, SSRIs are meant to treat that.
False. SSRI stands for Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor, the key there being REUPTAKE and INHIBITOR, meaning that the drug acts a long a neural pathway that prevents your brain's Mast Cells from reabsorbing your naturally occuring serotonin, keeping you "happier" for longer. No drugs used to treat depression add serotonin to the brain because that causes schizophrenia.
>If you're just thinking you're clinically depressed because of bad habits or over-thinking your current life, SSRIs are definitely a bad idea.
I was unable to function due to being so anxious despite literally nothing being wrong with my life.
>it's you and your doctor that aren't cognizant enough of your needs
Do you know how many psychopharm courses i've taken in school since this happened to me? Do you know how little correlational evidence there is supporting the idea that SSRI's actually treat depression? Do you know the failiure rates?

Jesus christ, you are so full of shit.

exactly

THIS. I was placed on a fuckload of drugs, taken off drugs, and put on new drugs since the age of 8. When I turned 18 and emancipated myself from my parents, I got off of everything, started CBT, meditation, and therapy for post traumatic stress disorder, and I am able to string senteces together for the first time in 12 years. The best tools we have to heal are our own minds.

Cringe just remembering it. Withdrawal is it's own wonderfully unique type of pain, very difficult to put into words. Explaining what its like to the dipshits here is like trying to tell a blind person what the color red is like.

SSRIs are shit dude, they make you emotionally flat and will kill your sex drive while you're on them, look into low dose ketamine treatment. It has unbelievably higher results of success than any kikepill currently on the market with alot less negative side effects

>they make you emotionally flat and will kill your sex drive while you're on them, look into low dose ketamine treatment.
It's crazy how few people realise that there are a shitload of documented cases where people have been permanently zombified, "blunted" or "dulled" as they say in the medical/pharmaceutical world. Also, fucking with your serotonin pathways can lead to permanent parkinsons-like movement disorders. Truly the stuff of nightmares.

>SSRIs are shit dude, they make you emotionally flat and will kill your sex drive while you're on them

might be a bonus if having no sex drive decreases my discontent about not being able to get laid.

What's your endgame?

placebo. go for a jog

it will decrease your discontent, but you will never feel any good emotions again either

My pee pee still works
But my head hurts now and I feel sick
I dont know what happened yesterday was great
Into the trash they go

I hate to say I told you so, but... Enjoy your inertia and cartoon porn, user.

Nah, Im going for a jog :^)

ssris helped me at least, i don't want to kill myself anymore, have energy and motivation to do stuff, the lack of sex drive is only a good thing
been on them for a year, starting to decrease the dosage, might stop in a few months

I'm wondering whether I have anhedonia/depression/GAD or if my friends and associates (many of whom have some diagnosis and are medicated) have merely convinced me I do. I certainly remember feeling unhappy more or less all the time, but in college it seems to be approaching a pathology. I originally went to a counselor with designs on a referral and some SSRI script, but I'm plagued by the same doubts being expressed in this thread. I've self-medicated with phenibut, psychs and of course alcohol and I've felt these substances have helped me. But what's to be done? Do I put in all the CBT work, meditate, exercise, eat vegetables and hope something gives? I just don't seem to have the inclination. My fervent hope is that SSRIS or possibly some GABA agonist will give me the push I need to make these lifestyle changes. Is it really such a big deal?

Try LSD

I've taken LSD numerous times and it unambiguously helps but doesn't seem viable for me long term. Do you recommend micro dosing?

Not the guy you responded to, but has anyone else found that psychedelics like shrooms and acid actually make depression worse? I was pretty depressed before I took shrooms and after I took shrooms I was worse than ever. Half of my trips have just been anxiety-ridden pits of existential terror.

[citation needed]
and parkinsons is involved with the dopamine pathways you tard.

>serotonin has no effect on dopamine pathways

SSRIs can cause mania during initial onset. How long you been on them for.

Ive microdosed once. It makes you feel emotionally connected, social, and optimistic.

user, this is a literature board, you should be literate about the subject at hand before posting. Thank you for your cooperation.

the problem I find is coming back to "reality". psychedelics definitely seem to approach some kind of deprogramming that is quickly undone once the trip & day after glow have subsided.

you're not doing them right.. Read Tim Leary- The Psychedelic Experience. It's a manual on how to trip based on the esoteric wisdom of the Tibetan book of the dead.

They are heaven and hell for me but ego death was complete depression killer

Two days
Yesterday was probably mania, yeah

It's pretty normal to have an emotional rollercoaster for the first month before they level out. Personally I think they're garbage, but if they helped one day they might be worth holding on to for a while.

It gave me the shake I needed but I dont think I want to keep taking them, today I felt really weird, for example, tried to read but cant "connect" with the text.
The stuff anons said in this thread really scared me too.

How can I delete this thread?
I was completely out of my mind yesterday, this isnt literature related at all

We are all family here. Be happy and dont worry.

Leave it up. Your crisis is fascinating.

This guy's fucked.
anti-depressants like lexapro permanently damage your libido.

Just that thought alone ought to be depressing enough to override whatever "positive" effects these shit-tier drugs have.

Life is depressing, no cheater drug will let you escape that fact forever.

Pharmaceutical companies are the most vile drug-pushers in ever. They don't give a damn about your mental health, and neither do therapists and pyschiatrists, for that matter.

When you try to stop taking SSRIs, you get random electric shocks in your brain, did they tell you that?

>caring about your libido
>being a sex cuck
>a cuck to sex
When will non-asexuals learn?

even if I only took them for 2 days?
wew lad

anti-depressants aren't supposed to be a fix-all, they're supposed to help you develop a routine that will keep you fulfilled after you go off them in a few months

Is not that cool, with the exception that I was having DMT tier close eyed hallucinations when I tried to sleep yesterday desu
Felt like I had an eye inside my mind

Amen.

Stay depressed Veeky Forums, stay depressed.

I don't want minutely updates; post again in like two hours or you'll use up my narrative interest.

I dont care about what you want

Ok

No its not OK.
I want you to care that I don't care what you want.

Stop roleplaying me

I don't care what you want.

Ok

I've done it. Inquiring about some sort of regimen though. I am dubious that 10ug every few days will do that much. Should I just buy baclofen or something? I know GABA shit works for me

It's hit or miss for everyone but I encourage you to be as honest as possible with your psychiatrist/psychologist if not they CANNOT help you. Personally the only thing that worked was "hitting rock bottom" and noow I'm slowly making steps.

> be as honest as possible with your psychiatrist/psychologist
How exactly?

If I had to put an image to what two years of benzo withdrawal (a result of alarmingly common malpractice) looks and feels like, this would be it.

Used to take Zoloft (sertraline), made me angry as fuck. You know Eric Harris, one of the Columbine shooters? He was on it too and had shared with doctors/ guidance counselors how freaked out he was at his own anger and they did nothing. Researching this it's crazy how many people on certain SSRI's have committed murder.

Actually been wondering, anybody know any good books on prescription drug withdrawal?

>I am dubious that 10ug every few days will do that much.
It's not about the dose, but rather the equilibrium and tolerance threshold your nervous sytem forms around it.

At the end of my withdrawal from clonazepam, I was weighing out on a fucking jewler's scale 0.0001mg in order to taper down painfully but not feel like I was gonna kill myself. A speck the size of Abe Lincoln's eye on the penny was my dose, and eventually I managed to cut that speck in half with a magnifying glass. Without it I would have gone nuts. The significant figures involved in a proper controlled withdrawal (to simulate a liquid administered taper) are mind bending. You'd be shocked how such a tiny amount can make such a huge difference.

Unless you're having suicidal ideations (medically defined as thoughts of suicide without plan or desire for action), which can be a side effect of SSRI's, amphetamines, benzodiazepines, and GABA-analogue class drugs.

>psychiatrists, social workers, etc, here in the US are mandated reporters (will lose their practicing license if they don't tell law enforcement or a hospital)
>get tossed into a mental ward
>handed over to a completely new psychiatrist who doesn't know your medical history
>fucks you up with new drugs and an improper 6-day taper (for insurance reasons!) off the old ones
>get beaten up by other patients
>someone has their eyes on you 24/7 while you eat, sleep, shit, and shower
>discharged even more fucked up than when you went in
>want to kill yourself more than before

Anything else is fine, but trust me this is the one thing you have to keep to yourself.

Going back on topic,
Yes, don't start with the Greeks for math. Go ahead and try either the Egyptians or the Mayans

>my mind is finally free of depression
You were never depressed to begin with then.