What are snails even trying to do?

And nobody really knows why...

Apparently its because snails used to eat all the monk's crops and they hated snails. It was basically a meme. Its the same thing with the hares.

That is certainly one guess put forward on the Internet. But nobody knows.

...and then shit got weird.

Snails are fucking metal. They are all hermaphrodites, and when they mate they basically both try to stab each other with their spearlike cocks. Whoever loses is the "female".

Metal as fuck

it's because snails are always triyng to conquer the world

I am currently developing a theory that the ancient monks down in the Scriptorium were smoking some primo shit.

Survive.

they are doing their best

>What are snails even trying to do?
Once, my buddy and I got very stoned, and saw a single snail on the wall. He saw us, and immediately curled into his shell. He was so frightened, we thought if we got him high, he would be okay.
So we didn't inhale a few puffs, instead blew it onto the snail. He came out of his shell, and tried to 'grab' our fingers. He chilled with us throughout the session. Later I found out that snails actually have cannabinoid receptors! So we did get him high.
This has nothing to do with this post, really.
We named him Washington.

Wtf is like a gay prison

So, prison.

my guess: there was probably some myth going around about how snails are the earthly representatives of the devil

eat, shit, reproduce, rinse, repeat

same as us, except we have all these fancy technology-laden ways of doing these same things

it's kind of depressing. they say having a family gives your life meaning. yeah maybe, but it still doesn't erase the pointlessness of it all

the pointlessness is still there

Might aswell kill yourself then if that's how you think, faggot

this line of thinking does usually end in suicide

but what kind of a world is this where the truth tells you you should die

>le truth meme
Maybe you just stop existing now for real
This is a board for science and knowledge, your enlightenment druggie nonsense is unwanted.

That was a good story, thanks bud.

>decided to grow eyes on it's penis
I've decided I want eyes on my penis too. How do I grow eyes on my penis?

You need to toke three GMOs

Are the other molluscs more complex versions of clams? I was under the impression that the clams were degenerated versions of molluscs and that the ancestral mollusc was free-living instead of sessile.

Not him but lets be real, in the grand scheme of things most of the shit we do is pointless. Thinking about that shouldnt make you want to kill yourself, its kind of funny in a way

Molluscs are our closest friends and we must defend them by any means necessary.
We must secure the existence of our people and the right to see cute snails chew on melons desu

Why are snails so cute, Veeky Forums?

I'm only here to rap, eat, sleep, grow old and smoke stokes through the hole in my neck.

>tfw no pet giant African land snail

Good thread for qt mollusk pics, thanks senpai

Did you end up keeping him?