"I'm an electrical engineer."

>Computer Science
>can you fix my computer lol

literally never heard any of that and i'm in contact with many blue collar workers and tradesmen. try not surrounding yourself with utter retards.

"I'm a Pharmacist"
>You get paid to count pills all day?

>chemical engineer

"whats that?"

"I'm a astrophysicist"
>"you use telescope and count the stars?"

>"farmer"

The shoulders of civilization. Doing god's work user

>heh thanks

Yeah, you're really cool. And you have nice biceps too

>come on now eh he

yeah, you're really lean and muscular... Would you mind If I.. touched myself while looking at you?

>w-wh...at?

You know you want it, you little bitch. Come on now show me that boipucci

>YAMEROOOOOOOOOOOOOOo

"I'm a petroleum engineer"
>Get in my pants

A kardadashian level retard once asked me if all we do is count to really big numbers when I told her I was a mathematics undergrad. I answered yes.

"I am an Industrial Engineer"
>Industrial "Engineer"

>Systems engineer

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA oh my god I'm so sorry HAHAHAHAHAHAH

"I'm an electrical engineer"
>"So you like sucking cock with the lights on?"

"I'm a Civil Engineer."
>Oh, okay...bye.

;_;

>Physics major
>Never interact with people outside of my course so I don't have anything to post to these threads
>Post anyway

I haven't even talked to most of my family since starting uni kek.

So you're not slaying pussy on Friday night's? The fuck?

well that one is kinda true.

I do occasinally go on cat-murdering sprees if that's what you're asking.

but this is true desu

>I'm a neuroscientist
OH EM GEE YOU MUST HAVE AN ACTIVE LEFT HEMISPHERE, IM AN ARTIST BECAUSE IM A RIGHT HEMISPHERE PERSON

>My last experiment looked at x peptide in metabolism
WOW SO I CAN JUST TAKE THAT DRUG AND EAT WHATEVER I WANT AND NOT GET FAT?

"I'm a materials engineer"
>What kind of engineer?

>I'm a math major
>I'll have a Mcdouble and a large fries, to go

ever time

30k starting?

>environmental engineer
"like a landscaper?"

>delusional engineer thinks he's going to earn alot of money, despite the fact he won't while math people learn deeper subjects

pathetic

"I'm a pharmacologist."
>"Oh cool, my cousin's a pharmacist!"

>Software engineer

"I'm a virologist"
>"Can you tell me what cold I have?"

This EVERY time.
>can you tune up my PC so it goes real fast?
>I have these ads that pop up...
>can't get my printer to work...
>can't connect to my wifi...
>can you build me a gaming PC?

>he tells people his title, and not what he actually fucking does

fucking pseud

>i am liberal arts.
>so you started collecting garbage after high school.

Not answering
>sure thing buddy
>you pay the parts
>I will charge 20€ per hour
>when will we start

I get this response 9/10 times

"I'm a paleontologist"
>"like Indiana Jones?"
>"you study like mummies and ancient civilizations"?

>yeah so im going for my phd in chemistry
"phd?"
>yeah its a doctoral degree
"ooooh you're gonna be a doctor? hey my knee's been hurting real bad can you..."

that was funny

"I'm a topologist"
>you make donuts all day?

kek

fuck i'm stealing this for my phd cover story

well? do you?
because if not you're like 60% less cool

>I'm a financial mathematician
oh wow user can you guess my credit score/??
>i can guess how i'm gonna price the derivatives on the economy around your sex tapes in 10 years you slut fuck off

>nah i mostly make cups of coffee

...

I literally got asked that

T. A physicist

UNDERATED

In the span of a week I literally got asked the same question twice.

"What's your major"?
CS
"Oh so do you know how to
Hack stuff?"

And again same question and their reply was
"Can you hack apple products"?

Fuck this major.

>Have friend who was a spotter for NWS
>Shows me all his programs he uses
>"Opinions on the movie Twister?"
>"Haven't seen it but if I did I'd probably spend the entire movie saying that these parts are not real/accurate"

"I'm a software developer / engineer"
>"Oh...so can you make another facebook?"

>Speaking with brainlets
You will never achieve proper wizard status.

"I'm a programmer"
>so, you can hack into stuff? XD

>>"Oh so do you know how to Hack stuff?"
>yes
>>"Oh...so can you make another facebook?"
>yes

was that so hard?

"I'm a systems engineer"
>can you help me with my outlook?

"Im a biologist"
>Whats this bug user?
>What should i eat to speed my metabolism?
>Hey user, my cat has X symptoms, whats wrong with him?

"I'm a medical student."
>"can you take a look at this zit on my back?"

Well, what was wrong with it?

More like
>"Wow, like Dr. House?"

When you think about it, the IQ difference between a math PhD and a person like that is at least 4 SD. It's like the difference between a normie and a vegetable level retard. It's quite plausible that there are at least a dozen peoole alive with literally twice as high IQ. It's mind blowing.

And then you realise there are countries with

Im a molecular biologist.

"I'm an archaeologist"
Oh, you mean you study dinosaurs?

You haven't answered the question. Is the cat fine?

"I'm an oncologist"
>what do you think about this big boil on my ass?

there exist people on the top end with IQ triple that of people on the low end

Yes, tasted great.

the electrician thing is too true

even when i hear "electrical engineer" i immediately think of electrician

>when you realise that by definition, half of the population has a sub-100 IQ

the more you think about it, the more you realize what a blessing it is
people like us wouldn't plow the fields, wouldn't clean the sewers, wouldn't tar roofs, wouldn't collect garbage
society wouldn't be able to function without a huge number of tards

kys fgt

kek

So. You literally can't hack anything?

Knowing this doesn't make me feel much like a genetic failure with my 112 IQ brainletism.

That's just sad user.

"Right now I'm studying algebra."
>"Oh really? I took that in middle school."

Whats so funny huh? You wanna go??

>Oh so can you like make video games?
Yeah
>Woah dude totally awesome, why don't you work for Ubisoft?

Im a robotics major
>can you make 2b for you?
>for you? Step off shes my robosqueeze.

And we proceed to fight

I get this shit JUST because of my Asperger's and I apparently come across as the "smart guy", when I tell them I study mathematics, physics; chemistry and computer science, it only serves to further reinforce their assertion that I'm:
>Real life Sheldon.
Why? Why are we a meme?

Oh and whats more, for my 21st my own MOTHER bought me a Bing Bang Theory trivia book, I've never watched the show in any meaningful way.
Why am I a meme to my own parents?

Just say:
>A viral one.
That's all we're told to say in med.

Do you wear tighty whities?

Just think of it this way: you've transcended humanity so far that the only way normies can hope to relate to you is to conpare you with the smartest person they know. Sheldon.

Nah, I go commando because of an injury.

I just say engineer now and let their imaginations run wild.

>get a summer job
>boss asks me what I'm taking
>"medicine"
>calls me engineer the rest of the summer

T-thanks

"Graphics designer"
> Please can you design logo / website / brochure / posters / stickers / t-shirts for my business
> You're really good. It should take you 10 minutes max
> I can't pay you but I'll talk to others about you

> I've got this genius business idea that could replace Facebook / Twitter one day
> All I need is a good motivated programmer to make it happen.

> I have this idea for a car engine that runs on air
> All I need is a good motivated chemist

>dad phones me from halfway across the country
>"hi microsoft word isn't working... it's doing this weird thing"
>"what weird thing?"
>"I dont know the words keep skipping back and forth"
>"can't really help, sorry"
>"oh wow so much for computer science"
FUCK OFF DAD REEE

"I'm a Physicist"
>wow you must be very smart
>omg realy
>like sheldon cooper from the bing bong thory zimbabwe xD
>do you know string theory
>what is dark matter/dark energy
>like einstein?
>is bing bang real

"I'm a philosophy major"
>what is the meaning of life?

That's a lie mate, noone knows what a torus is but doesn't at least know the basics of topology.

Dumbass med student, get out of our secret club. You're embarrassing all of us.

Just remember who's gonna be doing your prostate exam.

Relatable

I feel like counting vegetable tier 60IQ people is cheating.

Y-yeah, amazing how there are people with brain power 4-5 SD above an average human. I mean we aren't that much higher than some animals, when you think of it that way, the only reason we are here is that as a collective we all have a vastly higher intelligence. Just imagine what a billion sized society of 180+ IQ people would look like. Regular human civilisation would be a literal lower tier species/culture. We'd be seen in a similar way the west looks at those backward isolated tribes in Amazon and Polynesia. Fucking amazing.

"I'm a chemical engineer."
>Oh wow, you must be pretty smart.
"Well thank you, I'm working on ..."
>Zzzzzzz