ALIENS CONFIRMED!!!!!!!

idc i want to know about it either way

>hey guys we found little microbes haha

Oh look, another major announcement about it's search for ET. How many is this, like 5? And that's including that one where they mostly had to retract their claims.

it's probably not anywhere near as exciting as you think it is

Agreed... endlessly announcing AMAZING thing to be announced... ends up being something mildly interesting

>hey guys we found a planet that is the right distance from its star that might allow it to have liquid water lmao

>repeating exactly what was said in the post you are quoting

when they eventually announce aliens no one will care

are you implying that wouldn't be fucking groundbreaking?

>huffington post
been there done that

>repeating exactly what was said in the post you are quoting

It would be funny if it really was aliens this time.

is there a stream for this?

Guys, insider here, NASA found evidence of biological molecules from a geyser erupting from surface

I would also like to mention this means there is a chance of more complex life below the surface.

Of course all that a geyser can pass is miniscule.

Theyre just fucking germs they just sit around and dont do shit except kill you sometimes ffs.

but it would prove that life, or at least single-cellular life isn't very rare

Guys, NASA employee here. We found aliens! Live, breathing aliens. They are crab like and fast.

just another bug hunt

Also, based on composition and tissue density we suspect they are pretty tasty.

It proves life is common, that life is not special and anti-science fags would be btfo

Shut up, you're fake news! Aliens found us, and courts won't let me stop them invading! Sad!

why would anti-science fags think life only exists on earth?

...

Can I serve their legs at my movie theater?

because god made humans in his own image and this is the only world living things exist to live, to be judged and to serve god. any other being is demon spawn and is an abomination.

>You can only get your hopes up so many times before you become cynical.
>some faggot actually expected ayylmaos from NASA
kill yourself

Oh look another click bait shit people take seriously.
FYI i found new life in my fridge the other day,it my be a new kind of microbe.

There's a reason this survived so long. When alien life is eventually found they will find a way to interpret it and find 'passages that vaguely confirm life outside earth.

Just throw it under "the lord works in mysterious ways" and call it a day

>and this is the only world living things exist to live
please show me where in the bible this is stated

yea im getting sick of this shit

>"We are positively THRILLED to announce to you that we can add another entry to our long, long list of vague maybes and possible potentialities. I know, I know, this blew our minds too!"

>buying crab legs at a movie theatre

It's like you are trying to get yourself sick

Doesn't matter how many cells it has, it's an alien therefore Veeky Forums BTFO.
>"hurr ayyliums are not reel!"
>"durr we're alone in this fuckhuge universe!"
If there are bugs on Europa then god knows what could exist on the earthlike exoplanets.

bigger bugs?

So the omnipotent and omnipresent God can't created life in other places? I mean God made animals too isn't?

>major announcement about search for life
>nasa is defunding search for life
>search for life is now pay per view

Happeding!

CORRECT

Huffpost
aka
CIA front

please die.
You are not real news. Heck even news isnt real news its fake. But atleast its only funded by your jewish overlords.
>inb4 doubting everything ive said here without evidence.

it's you who requires evidence

Wow, fermat's little theorem must provide such little interest to you.

I have evidence. I just dont need to share it.

I could prove it to you. But i cant be bothered to lift you out of ignorance. Have fun proving it to yourself.

sorry, read my post as Fermats LAST theorem.

Damn google autocorrect.

Also. add extra sarcasm.

I added sarcasm, but the page was not large enough to contain it (swish).

wait, is this sarcasm?

Like 90% of the shit religious people believe it isn't in the book.

The point is that dumb faggots THINK it is. Muhammad explicitly told his followers not to make depictions of him because he didn't want people getting anal about his appearence. His followers responded by getting anal about him not appearing instead. A dumb faggot doesn't have to be right to do something dangerous, he just has to be a dumb faggot.

Fundies don't care if Jesus references aliens, they'll deny he ever said it and shut you out if you try to explain it.

plus jesus was an alien himself right

Liar.

The cancerous fedora is strong in this one.

>be me
>be reporter that can't wright
>be interviewing person who can't talk
>have audience that can't read
>be the """science""" correspondent

>be NASA
>constant threat of budget cuts
>announce an announcement about the search for life on other planets
>get people hyped
>countdown to announcement
>hype level increases
>countdown reaches 0:00
>intern still setting up microphones
>announcement happens 15 minutes late
>"ugh, hello, we are excited to announce that we detected an earth-like planet infinity trillion miles away. no aliens. no aliens whatsoever. we will now show you this shitty slideshow about something you don't care about, and then we'll answer some questions about this that our interns which we planted in the audience will ask us"
>wonder why people in government and the general public want to cut our budget
>repeat process every 3 months

Im a actually an auditor for NASA so am in their building quite a lot. The big excitement this week that i presume will be the basis of the announcement is that through the relativity of light and time dilation they were able to look at earth through to the future and what they saw was beautiful. Everyone was mixed race and no drumpflets to be seen x pls fund

>confirmation that a molecule of the two most common and reactive elements in the universe is also common

aliens are angels

mfw we get to be the apocalyptic invaders for another species

>NASA says they have an announcement
>Idiot: IT'S ALIENS
>NASA: It's not aliens
>Idiot:THEY LIED TO US!
Every time

>Finding cells elsewhere in our own solar system means life isn't rare

What a retarded leap of logic to make.

Get raped, NASA

Is this going to be a weekly thing on Veeky Forums now?

I know it's not the case, but I wish they saw a dead Europa fish in one of the water plumes or something because that would increase the chances of me eating an alien organism before I die.

>WHERE ARE YOU HIDING ALIENS????? >AYLMAO NASA = Never A Straight Answer!!!

>implying christians cannot adapt their beliefs to the evidence of alien life
>implying that christianity is the only ideological front that denies science

>doge-posting
Why the fuck are there so many Redditors on this site?

they shut down a subreddit for the alt right and they all screamed bloody murder and left in a huff

Those were both written well before we'd even be capable of proving whether or not extraterrestrial life exists, though.

God and Aliens have the same amount of evidence for their existence at the moment. It's hypocritical of you as a Veeky Forumsentist to belittle one while supporting the other.

HOWEVER proving extraterrestrial life's presence or nonpresence is ultimately doable via the scientific method, while God requires discarding it. So I guess aliens have a higher possibility of being irrefutably proven.

Isn't that confirmed already? I bet it's going to be something like
>guize we detected minute amounts of x bla bla likely hydrothermal vents bla bla bla huge implications for the most important scientific dis-.. bla bla bla... more bullshit

>Crab-like
Good, that means if they get too rowdy we can just attack the weak points for massive damage.

Why would such news be bullshit?

aliens are angels and demons. demons and angels are aliens. science and religion are both true in their own way - two sides of the same coin. God created the big bang. Mankind evolved into what it is now. God "creating" Adam was God imbuing consciousness in the first human. Fallen angels/aliens had infighting between them and splintered off into various groups, creating different religions and interacting with humans. They gave humanity fire, and educated mankind with regards to technology. We're still being guided and advised.

It's sensationalist pop-sci garbage. I literally could care less that another moon has geological activity.

*couldn't

>be user
>can't spell
>is brainlet

Thing is, even if microbial extraterrestrial life is confirmed, the biggest push back will be from ethic fags. Religiousfags simply don't have a say in the matter, but if some pseudointellectual jerk starts spamming through journalists
>muh contamination
>muh perfect ecosystem
>muh DISRUPTIVE human curiosity
NASA won't be able to send even a probe to gather samples

Those are actually legit concerns that affect humanity and our own place in the world. I'm fine with non-invasive exploration, but we have to draw the line somewhere otherwise we'll treat those alien ecosystems just as we do those on Earth (destructively), and this is plain wrong and unacceptable.

Except their not microbes and you faggots can keep dreaming.

why does nasa keep doing this bullshit? There is water all over the place, it stopped being interesting after water was found on Europa.

When are we going to see some Europan shrimps, lads?

I agree with sterilizing probes.

However, people need to understand that every year, several hundred kilograms of rock that was blasted off of the surface of the Earth, after life already arose here, lands on Europa and embeds itself into the ice, where it is later subducted into the warm-ice layer and eventually ends up in the sub-surface ocean. We know that microbes can survive being blasted into space and can survive landing from space embedded in rocks, we know that microbes can remain dormant for millions of years before reanimating once conditions are right, and we know that this process of material from Earth dumping onto Europa has been going on for -billions- of years.

Even if life never arose on Europa independently of Earth, there's a good chance that Earth life landed there and took hold, evolving to fit Europa's sub-glacial environment and continued to change over time for billions of years independently of Earth's biosphere. Any more modern life that was transported there after the original 'seeding' took place would probably just be eaten by the pre-existing life which at that point would have been far better adapted to surviving there and would simply out-compete the newcomers.

That actually holds true even if Europan life arose independently of Earth life; if E. Coli for example were dumped into Europa's oceans while they were sterile, it may find a way to eke out an existence and gradually evolve to better survive and diversify etc. However, if E. Coli showed up today and found itself in a giant ocean of highly adapted, successful organisms, it probably wouldn't be able to find a niche and would just die off due to the over-competition.

Either way the only way to know is to find out by taking a look with some kind of probe. And for fuck's sake NASA, put some instruments on the probe that look for life itself, not just evidence of it. Optical microscopes are good for that.

>SpaceX develops the ITS
>decades later the system has propellant plants up and running on Mars, the Moon, and Callisto.
>the Jupiter system becomes a space-economic hotspot, surface colonization of Callisto and subsurface colonization of Ganymede and Europa are taking off
>space immigrant Jamal Brown, a young entrepreneur from Florida sets up a shrimp farm in a brine pocket embedded in Europa's surface ice sheet
>all is going well until seismic activity cracks the ice sheet around Jamal's shrimp farm and some of the crustaceans escape into Europa's interior ocean
>most starve but a few make it to the bottom and find geothermal vents colonized by Europan bacteria
>after a few decades of harsh natural selection the shrimp adapt well to their new environment and now fit into the Europan biosphere as the very apex of the food chain

and all was well in the solar system

>captcha; select all of the images of shrimp

spoopy

ITS REAPING TIME

>Hey guys we found organic compounds life may be out there stay tuned

Would such a thing even be possible? Panspermia by objects falling inward due to gravity is one thing, but could it travel outwards as well?

give any number of reasons why it's "plain wrong and unacceptable" you vacuous mook

Sssh. Don't shake the conditioning

Evolution doesn't work that way. It's more of random mutations that EVENTUALLY after a bajillion generations MIGHT result in something useful.

>objects falling inward due to gravity is one thing, but could it travel outwards as well

Orbits don't work like you think they work. All objects fall inwards for half of their orbit, but falling inwards speeds them up so that they end up slinging away again on an elliptical path. Spacecraft get around in space by accelerating along their orbital ellipse at specific times in order to change the shape of the ellipse so that they can coast to their destinations. The parameters of an orbit are determined by the gravitational field the object is orbiting in and the kinetic vector energy of the object being considered. A giant impact is an event that accelerates a large number of small objects on random trajectories.

Impact ejecta on an escape trajectory from any body can either be escaping prograde with respect to the Sun, retrograde, or on some more radial/polar trajectory. An object can be kicked either faster or slower with respect to the Sun. The result for an object moving faster is an elliptical orbit that goes higher than the starting object's orbit, and for an object moving slower is the opposite happens.

What determines how far the material can go is actually not the Sun's gravity, but the Earth's (in this case). Earth has pretty strong gravity, which means the impact energy must be very high in order to get any material at all going fast enough to end up on an escape trajectory. This also means that most Earth impact ejecta doesn't get onto a high enough or low enough solar orbit to encounter any of the other planets in the solar system. However, some of that 'nearby' ejecta will gravitationally interact with the Earth and the moon later on, and end up being gravitationally kicked around, which can then lead to further encounters with other planets and the eventual migration of material all throughout the solar system. On other worlds like Mars, with low escape velocity, much much more material can be blasted to beyond escape velocity.

>It's more of random mutations that EVENTUALLY after a bajillion generations MIGHT result in something useful.

Did I imply it worked any differently? I said Earth life dropped into Europa's oceans would eventually adapt to better survive, as long as it survived at all in the first place. Of course there's no 'choosing to evolve' or anything like that. Evolution by natural selection pressures results in organisms better adapted to their environment, through the filtering out of disadvantageous mutations and thereby the 'selection' of beneficial features.

As for the time scales, it does not by any means take 'a bajillion generations' for an organism to evolve useful features, especially for bacteria. Nylon is a synthetic chemical invented by humans in the last century, and bacteria have already evolved an enzyme that can break it down for use as food, similarly to sugars. Even macroscopic life can evolve quickly under the right circumstances; Italian wall lizards accidentally introduced to a small island near Croatia evolved an entirely new gut structure, a larger head, and stronger jaws, as a result of being forced into a herbivorous diet, in just 30 years. To think that a population of Earth life introduced to Europa (again, as long as it could survive in the first place and continue to reproduce) would not rapidly adapt to better survive in its new environment and diversify to take advantage of different aspects of said environment is not supported by what we see on Earth.

>Would such a thing even be possible? Panspermia by objects falling inward due to gravity is one thing, but could it travel outwards as well?

Considering that:

1. Over 100 meteorites that were ejected from Mars' surface have already been discovered on Earth's surface so far

2. Impact events that have occurred here on Earth (such as the impact that caused the Cretaceous-Paleogene extinction event over 60,000,000 years ago) are known to have been so intense so as to release ejecta from Earth's surface and out into space

...then, yeah. I think it actually is possible for life on Earth to have been distributed throughout this star system over these past 4,000,000,000 years or so that terrestrial life has been around. And after billions of years, terrestrial extremophile bacteria could have evolved and adapted to survive in some of the most extreme environments of this star system.

Considering that:

1. This star system is only one out of over 100,000,000,000 star systems in this galaxy

2. This galaxy is only one out of over 2,000,000,000,000 galaxies in the observable universe

3. Life on Earth has been around for over 4,000,000,000 years

...if it turns out that life on Europa developed independently from life on Earth, then that could mean that life may have developed independently and survived and even thrived on other celestial bodies (whether they be: planets, dwarf planets, minor planets, moons, comets, asteroids, kuiperoids, etc.) within this star system alone.

is this thing in 5 mins? i don't understand how i am this easily confused by DST and timezones

please let it be something interesting

about to start

nasa.gov/

link: nasa.gov/multimedia/nasatv/index.html#public

i love how socially awkward everyone is