Bill holds up an Erlenmeyer flask. The audience ooohs

> Bill holds up an Erlenmeyer flask. The audience ooohs.
> "Now this might look like water, but it's actually an aqueous solution."
> Audience starts clapping
> Electronic dance music starts playing
> Adam from the mythbusters comes out on a scooter with colorful beakers and a lab coat.
> Bill and Adam start dancing with beakers, audience cheers
> Record scratch, music abruptly stops
> Zoom into Bill's face, "Now let's get serious folks."
> "Can you believe there are still people who believe in God, and not climate change?"
> Audience erupts in laughter, more applause
> "Folks we have a very special guest here today to tell you why space is WOKE!"
> Neil DeGrasse Tyson comes out in a space suit
> Audience furiously clapping now, can barely contain themselves
> Tyson: "The potential for life is everywhere in the universe, Star Trek and Star Wars could be real!"
> Audience hands are now bleeding from all the clapping.
> Bill: "Well that's all the time we have today, join us next week when we tell you more about why science rocks!"
> Electric guitar solo, audience starts chanting aggressively "Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill!" Their claps are now full repetitive nazi salutes.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=nVn-yuobpfk
youtube.com/watch?v=1u9meHJFGNA
youtube.com/watch?v=hRNe-QlU8pI
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

Please... s-stop...

I would unironically watch this.

you forgot the part where Bill says "and I'm here to... dare I say it... save the world!", and all the ladies are furiously masturbating in the front row

Were you the poster who posted this shit on /pol/?

beautiful

>starred in a kid's show and was a mechanical engineer
>people think this makes him a "scientist" and therefore an authority on all science

He's a fraud and a massive douchebag.
youtube.com/watch?v=nVn-yuobpfk

This was really fucking bad

>"H-hey you wanna see my impressions?"
>"I have a g-gun, that's funny r-right?"

you magnificent bastard

Jesus Christ what a joke
>"my name is bill!"
terrible. You can hear the disappointment in the audience

>Though the TV show is hosted by Nye, five correspondents assist in the presentation of the show. These include fashion model Karlie Kloss, science YouTuber and educator Derek Muller, comedian Nazeem Hussain, comedian and writer Joanna Hausmann, and the TV host and producer Emily Calandrelli.[4][5] The show also features guest appearances from Zach Braff, Donald Faison, Rachel Bloom, Joel McHale, Wil Wheaton, Jonna Mae[6], Steve Aoki, and Tim Gunn.[3] The thirteen-episode series premiered on April 21, 2017.[3] The show's theme song was produced by Tyler, the Creator.[7]

NOT
ONE
SCIENTIST

I don't get it.

Thats wrong though.

Nazeem Hussain shouldn't be called a comedian.

Religious Nut:
>The world will end on the 23rd!
>I meant the 26th.
>Of next month.
>... next year?
>A decade from now.

Climate/ population scientist:
>The worlds ice caps will all be melted by 2000
>Sorry, 2007
>Before 2020
>By the end of the century
>There's too many people, if we don't act quickly there will be massive food shortages and lack of living space by the 2000's!
>Population numbers are leveling off and even dropping... WE HAVE TO GET THE POPULATION GROWING AGAIN!
>Provided the ones doing it are from African and Arabic countries.


Same faggots, different gods

Nobody smart enough to be a scientist is stupid enough to besmear his own reputation by associating himself with this.

>The worlds ice caps will all be melted by 2000
I bet you can't post a single credible source who claimed that.
Making shit up isn't going to impress people.

>>>>>wil wheaton

That's actually not that bad imo

STOP HAVING CHILDREN, WHITE PEOPLE

A few mild keks from me. I don't get the bob who joke so I must be subhuman.

It means that there are a lot of people with the name Bob.

...

wtf I hate science now

Holy shit! I want to kill myself when I think of cringy things I said/did, I am amazed this guy is still alive, cause this is next level.

...

Well that show is actually objectively fucking terrible. Also the guy is a fraud, not a real scientist and pushing an agenda.

Good thread, OP, funny stuff.

I know man made climate change is real, but why does it feel like a conspiracy? The way they force it into popular media seems so artificial and orchestrated, and it seems like they always give shittier evidence/arguments for it than they actually have. It's almost as if they want to keep a certain percent of people in denial just to keep everyone divided.
Is there any value to what I just said or have I gone too /pol/?

The whole point is that people get tied up arguing about existence rather than solutions.
And what you get is a bunch of fiscally retarded scientists and ecotards trying to think of solutions, but all those solutions involve massive taxation, corruption and straight flagellation of the common man. Obviously the common man sees this and wants no part.
If you feed two retarded extremes into fighting each other it alienates the common man from taking action, so you can keep the status quo going.
Until you get someone proposing realistic solutions without brow beating everyone, you're not gonna get shit to happen.

>I know man made climate change is real
it's not though

>high energy comedy impression
>HIGH ENERGY

He was on the trump train long before any of us

>He's a fraud and a massive douchebag.
this. even in his new show, he holds a bar magnet far enough away from iron oxide (Fe2O3, AKA rust) and claims it's not magnetic, when it in fact is, just not as strongly magnetic as pure iron.
he did this to debunk quackpot homeopathic medicine and crap, but it's dishonest af, and entirely unethical, especially from someone touting science as pure and omnipotent

...

You need to browbeat people because radical individualism was a mistake. The existance of the Human race is a trascendent goal and should take precedence over petty individual goals.

If you ask me the environmentalists aren't doing enough. We need parenting licenses, mandatory sterilization, a global ban on fossil fuels with a deadline 25 years from now, government funded research into thorium nuclear reactors and a manned space mission to colonize Mars.

Voting should also be limited to high IQ taxpayers and military veterans that have earned their right. People receiving government welfare automatically lose their right to vote.

Great, you first. Kill yourself and eliminate your negative contribution the the environment.

The survival of the species is a gola that transcends your individual desire after all.

You don't need to cut basic human rights, just human privileges.

I'm not having kids.
Most people shouldn't be having kids.
Particularly in poor countries like Africa.

Licensing childbirth is morally very different from killing people. You are trying to twist my argument into something that it's not.

>Licensing childbirth is morally very different from killing people.
This. We should be killing people.

>I'm not having kids.

You shouldn't :^)

>guy used to be bad at something
>continued to put in effort at it
>became success at something he cared about
>got more people into actual science even if many more are just dude SCIENCE LMAO types
>user on an imageboard can't accept that people change or that public advocates are important but also can't accept that this guy is doing well despite that

You're just the fox here really.

What's wrong with calling him a massive douchebag. And he is a fraud -- a misleading non-scientist that is

I agree with all besides voting. Politics is for the politicians and the elite. The common person is too stupid shortsighted and detached from events to have any say on decisions that will affect him years from now. China has the right idea and there's a reason this century will be theirs.

>Voting should also be limited to high IQ taxpayers and military veterans that have earned their right.
I also propose that we develop powered armor and go wipe out the arachnids once and for all.

MY NAME IS BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GOY

Neither should you :^)

>NO U

I'm going to put kids in a bitch just to piss you off now. Enjoy being alone. :^)

I'm not alone, I'm fucking a 19 year old that doesn't want kids either

You sound bitter :^)

>Karlie Kloss
Is there a computer science segment on the show?

lel there was one about machine learning and AI. she wasnt on there

What you are proposing effectively ends in genocide. Nice going, Adolf, I'm racist as shit but I do realize we can't just do that.

I would like to know more.

Typical radical individualist warped ethics. I'd be saving billions of lives by sterilizing people.

>19 year old that doesn't want kids
Yet.
Most people grow out of that childish idea.

Wait until her biological clock starts ticking.

Bill the fucking cuck guy?

We need a massive rollout of nuclear power all around the world and the corresponding use of all that extra power to rip co2 out of the air both by greening deserts and by straight up tearing the co2 out of the air and making it into commodities like carbon fibre and whatnot.

>Karlie Kloss

because when it comes down to it these people feel like everyone is too stupid to think for themselves or handle honest facts so they lie and exaggerate things to get people on their side.

what happens though is it just makes people annoyed with them and generally not care about what they have to say since the argument is framed in such vague nebulous terms rather than real concrete ones that individuals can take honest action with.

also climate science is a bit bullshit because they really have no clear idea what will happen with more carbon being releasesed or a slight warming. its like people who thought the first nuclear bomb would light the atmosphere on fire, they are assuming the worst without the evidence to back it up, but they say that they don't need evidence because by the time we have it it will be too late.

>he has to inflate his ego by insulting both ends of the spectrum at the same time using a poorly crafted strawman

grouping the sensible conclusion that "God is real" together with a bunch of moronic statements only makes you look even more desperate.

We know that of the methane stored in the ocean floor is released it can have a trigger effect leading to a positive feedback loop of rising CO2 and rising temperatures.

We do not know at which exact temperature that reaction may be triggered though

but we also know that higher temperatures will increase cloud cover and help to cool the environment

some climate scientists say that will create a "hot box" scenario like Venus but it doesn't seem as likely since the clouds reflect more incoming solar energy than they bottle in.

Climate scientists know and think of a lot more than you might think.

>the size of those fucking error bars

/ T H I S /
Not one scientist. Not a single fucking PhD.
Just hipster undergrads psyop show.

Makes my blood boil every time I see that picture. 90k likes on Instagram.

>Karlie Kloss
cd
cd
cd
cd
cd code
cd
cd
cd

>why does it feel like a conspiracy

Maybe because the guy who resumed selling it to us was also the guy who sold us NAFTA, and what an awesome thing that would be for the common folk?

Inconvenient Truth 2:
youtube.com/watch?v=1u9meHJFGNA

Gore flogs NAFTA:
youtube.com/watch?v=hRNe-QlU8pI

why did every city jump on the mandatory recycling bandwagon as soon as possible? because it gave them an excuse to write a huge trip of laws that allow them to fine people who own property

climate change funds that go to the UN just fucking disappear. it's free money for the jews they just have to guilt ppl into sending them money. the kikes are elite tier nigerian scammers

hey if you don't get the results you want, just change it and expand the error bar so the truth is still in your margin of error. works every time hehe

(((science goy)))

>remember biology guys?
>yeah well it's literally wrong, and racist.

Well that's the thing, people without credible sources are using climate change to convey a doomsday narrative.

gore claimed we are on our 4th ice arctic year, but none claimed by 2000

lol he used to be kind of a chad!

I have a challenge for anyone willing to take it:

Write me a professional thesis on how a virtually universally adored childhood figure jumped the shark so badly.

Fucking kek

Abstract: Because he is trying to overstep his boundary of knowledge to ensue ideas of psuedoscience and pass then off as academic fact.

No thesis 4 u

>typical jew circle jerk

WEW
E
W

They gave him a shit load of money.

I remember his show for kids, and then as far as I knew he just went away for several years. Then I started hearing about him again mostly in the context of global warming and political shit.

I'd say he jumped the shark years ago when his show ended.

wait, those captions are real?

>((Karlie Kloss))
>Is there a computer science segment on the show?
Yes, its called

cd..

underrated post

Jesus christ how did things get so bad this fast. It feels like everything just got turned on its head within the last year or two.

...

Gentlemen, how do we unreddit science? I propose we make it conservative.

Kek

that is a lot of fun. a genuine person for real not alot of those left. not super funny but sort of overthought humor

We'd first have to eliminate the friction (gas the SJWs).

>she needs to join our startup

>writing your own concatenate function
>including a space
>errorchecking a hello world print
Wtf

Sounds fucking awesome to me OP

No, everyone should have children and as many as they want. Then move the age of legal abortion up to 18yo. Then encourage parents to cull the underperforming.

The sensationalizing is what is a conspiracy, not the science of it. It's jumped on by people who do have an agenda to pursue that isn't simply environmentalism but rather accruing more control and power (And no I'm not referring to some Jewish conspiracy, simply the fact that any organization or institution by nature never likes to give up power and by nature will obtain more power if they can) or those who do have an environmental interest at heart but pursue it with a messianic fervor. This turns off people in the middle who mistakenly think the choice is either "fuck the planet no global warming" or "Fuck humanity sacrifice yourself on the altar of Gaia". And there is a real class component to it too. "Stop using AC and eating beef but don't mind us with private jets and haute culture cuisine"

Never underestimate the capacity for corruption and cronyism to find a way to make a buck.

Bill Nye needs to go back to making children's television. If he wants his show to actually "save the world" he should be trying to inspire the next generation instead of pandering to millennial that watched VHS tapes of him in science class 20 years ago.

>Bill Nye shows up on stage riding a Segway with periodic table decals plastered all over it
>crowd cheers and starts chanting BILL BILL BILL
>"Alright guys, we're gonna do some SCIENCE!"
>crowd erupts into a frenzy
>electronic dance music starts playing as Bill mixes two flasks of identical looking liquid and produces a blue solution
>the audience is turning genderfluid nonbinary as he's doing this
>"As I mix these two compounds, I want to remind you that, just like this liquid flask I'm holding, race is a SOCIAL CONSTRUCT!"
>chants of Black Lives Matter roar through the audience, whites are checking their privilege en masse
>suddenly a voice from the back of the audience says, "But I have data proving there's differences in IQ between the races!"
>the music stops
>the crowd turns immediately silent
>"Who said that?" shouts Bill Nye as he steps off his segway. "Who fucking said that?!"
>A lone white male stands up in the audience, with two charts showing intrinsic differences between the races
>"The facts speak for themselves! Blacks have lower IQ even when adopted by white parents!"
>deathly quiet tension in the air
>suddenly somebody starts chanting "Hate facts, hate facts, hate facts!"
>the crowd joins in
>they start encircling the white male, their chants getting louder
>a Pansexual Fairy Sprite starts screeching and hissing in demonic tongues about privilege
>this is the signal for the crowd to rush the poor white man and tear him limb from limb
>as this happens, Bill Nye drops his pants and starts masturbating at the carnage, using the flask he was holding earlier as an anal pleasure tool
>the audience joins in and partakes in a massive orgy of semen and the white male's blood
>in the midst of this, an AfroAsian queerkin finds the papers used by the white male and burns them with his bong lighter
>crowd cheers at this spectacle
>Bill Nye shouts, "That's science!"
>roll credits

>It's season 3 of Bill Nye Saves the World
>The highest rated show ever
>The show is so successful it has ushered in a new era of prosperity for the United States
>The roaring 20s are happening again
>Season 3 has been great
>Everyone loved it
>99.7% of American households report watching it
>Religion has been wiped off the face of the earth
>Climate change is real and everyone donates to the Bill Nye Fund to help stop it
>The US government formally recognizes 853 genders, with more added virtually every day
>Trump got lynched last year, and now-president Degrasse Tyson personally held the noose
>The audience holds its breath in anticipation of the season finale show
>He enters the stage
>Crowd goes wild
>400 babies are conceived and immediately aborted
>"Who's ready for some science?"
>Collective orgasms can be heard across the country
>"Because today"
>World peace would have happened if it wasn't already a product of the show by season 2
>"We"
>The crowd prays to nothing in thanks for this gift
>"Are talking about"
>A Mexican family vaults the border wall as ICE agents cheer them on, the show playing on a massive TV screen embedded in a nearby hillside
>"How race"
>The four remaining Christians in obscure parts of the world commit suicide
>"Is actually not real"
>The 104% LGBT crowd gives a standing ovation

> Bill rides onto stage on a tandem bicycle alone
> Crowd laughs
> "HOWDY FOLKS, ARE YOU READY FOR SCIENCE?"
> Crowd says "YAAAAAASSSSS"
> Adam Savage from Mythbusters is in the background throwing vinegar into a paper machine volcano with a disco ball spinning above him
> Bill cracks a glowstick
> Audience begins clapping and says ooooohhh
> Adams volcano stops erupting, his smile disappears and he looks worried
> Audience in unison goes "awwwwww" in disappointment
> Bill looks furious with Adam. This isnt the first time this has happened.
> Adam looks scared, has bruises on him.
> Bill walks over and starts beating the shit out of Adam Savage from Mythbusters
> "Folks there is only one thing I hate more than CLIMATE CHANGE DENIERS" he says in between open hand slaps
> Crowd is nodding their head in agreement
> "I fucking HATE bad scientists!"
> Adam Savage is uncontrollably sobbing under his desk.
> Bill Nye lights a snake firework on the stage and the audience claps furiously while chanting "BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL"

> Sneaky music comes on
> Bill tip toes out from behind the curtains around the stage.
> The audience says "Huhhhh??" in a collective gasp, not knowing where Bill is.
> Bill is in his Nyddler outfit, what could he be up to?
> Tip toes behind little 8 year old girl in the crowd.
> Bill taps her on the shoulder and she turns around
> "ITS SCIEEEEENCE TIMEEEEEEE!", Bill says as he punches the little girl right in the nose, breaking it
> The audience gasps as the girl screams, blood splurting from her nose
> Music suddenly changes, whats happening? Bill is transforming
> Bill rips off the Nyddler outfit and reveals his classic Bow Tie outfit
> "Ooops! That was just my body was identifying as the evil twin, The Nyddler! Science folks, science!"
> Bill begins to laugh and the audience laughs with him and begins applauding
> Electronic dance music comes on, and Bill dances his way back to the stage
> Record scratch, cut music, zoom in to Bill's face
> "Lets get serious!", Bill says as he turns his head sharply towards the camera
> Bill pulls out out a torch and lights a flame
> "This may look like a fire, but its actually a result of a chemical reaction!"
> Biiiiiig ooooooohhhh from the audience
> Electronic dance music comes back on
> Bill freezes, then throws the torch to the side
> Bill begins dancing, as the torch lights part of the set on fire
> The crowd gives standing ovation as they chant "BILL! BILL! BILL!" (The little girl still bleeding)
> Members of the audience begin to catch fire and die as Bill is dancing away in the back
> The audience, despite being on fire, continues to clap and chant Bill!

>Bill rides onto stage with a unicycle
>Whats up folks, excited this episode?
>the audience all monotonously says yes at the exact same time
>Perfect
>Bill holds up a match
>Now this may look like a regular match, but when we apply friction we create a chemical reaction
>The audience is now furiously clapping, amazed by the wonders of science
>a lone member of the audience stands up
>Are we actually going to see some higher then year 9 science here?
>everything stops
>people are shocked
>bill the most shocked
>YOUR THE ONE WHO JUST SAID THAT WERENT YOU?
>what are you....
>YOU JUST FUCKING SAID THAT
>Bill please calm down you're scar....
>DONT YOU FUCKING TELL ME TO COME DOWN, YOU'RE JUST ANOTHER CLIMATE CHANGE DENIER
>At the accusation the crowd is sent into a frenzy, all pull out their thermometers and proceed to stab the poor man, getting orgasms in the process.
>As the demonic pansexualites are stabbing the poor man, Bill is pleasuring himself with a dildo sourced from Lena Dunham herself.

>Geee gender-equal non-racial friends, I just don't understand why those stupid conservatives are so skeptical of nu-science.
>It must be because they are racist/sexist/kkk/literally hitler/bigots
>now watch this cartoon about ice-cream cones having an orgy for science