Veeky Forums Writes a (new) Novel, Part One: The Beginning

It has been a while since we, as a board, collaborated on a major project together.

The last Veeky Forums novel (tLoTiaT) is generally agreed upon as a success and, above all else, was incredibly fun to do.

Our next novel is going to have a decidedly more focused, plot-driven structure (which still is not saying much. It's still gonna be post-pomo af, don't worry)

It begins with a lone protagonist who is brought before a Pantheon of gods to be judged at the apocalypse. The basic structure will be built around the questions asked by the gods and the main protagonist's lengthy answers. In between chapters will be intermissions filled with poetry from anons, and at the end will be an appendices filled with additional stories that did not make into the main chapters.

The attached image is part 1/2 of everything you need to know so far.

The first order of discussion should probably be the Pantheon itself, as the main thematic content of the novel will come largely from these characters. We are currently working with 7 as the number of Gods in the pantheon, but this can be changed with sufficient reasoning.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=Ahb1PJquOlU
youtube.com/watch?v=KoMh3XuB784
pastebin.com/raw/7Eqvvn04
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

part 2/2

We wrote at least other 3 novels after legacy of a totalitarianism. And they were all progressively more disjointed (if that was even possible) and worse. Let's hope for the best with this one

>The last Veeky Forums novel (tLoTiaT)

In the pantheon there will be a 3 story statue of a cock

One user had the idea that one of the gods is Joyce, and the mc must interpret something from Finnegans Wake for him.

>they were all progressively more disjointed (if that was even possible) and worse

Which is why they shall not be mentioned

This is a really good idea. I've added it to a master doc I have going.

I think at least one of the gods should be a Greek philosopher.

Plato? Aristotle?

Who do we like most?

>joyce
>DFW
>stirner
>one of the greeks
>john green maybe? or rupi kaur

>joyce
>DFW
>stirner
>one of the greeks

Agree on all. I would say we should limit the amount of Veeky Forums memes here though.

>john green maybe? or rupi kaur

Potentially. Or possibly a character who represents all cucks like John? He would share a few of John's traits but not be specifically him.

I feel like the cuck archtype is significant enough to be a member of the pantheon but not John on his own, if you catch my drift.

He has to have some name though, not necessarily John Green.
Also there needs to be a reason that he's one of the gods, he can't just be some random cuck off the streets.

Now that I think about it, John Green is actually a good place to start. There's just something about his face and his mannerisms. He is already a living meme in a way so why not.

He will have to be built up in stature a bit, but because the story takes place sometime in the future we can easily do that. It could be implied that by this time John Green has become a massive cult figure on par with the rest of the 'gods'. In his particular case though, he has come to be the ultimate representation of the nu-male archetype.

This opens up the door to a lot of themes surrounding the nu-male/cuck vs masculinity dichotomy. Another one of the gods in the pantheon could be an opposite of this, someone who oozes masculinity.

I don't care enough to actually contribute but just a few points of concern from an outsider looking in:

1. I can see this easily falling into 7 pseud philosophical questions
2. The story as answer is a cool concept but the last line being the answer relies on some powerful ass lines (intentionally) or some powerfully dank memes (unintentionally)
3. Literally naming the gods after authors is plen af. If you were to make comparisons, in the same way Dr. Pangloss is a stand-in for Leibniz without literally being Leibniz, you would be far better off. It leaves room for interpretation and doesn't limit the work to a specific critique of one guy or girl at one time but rather everyone who was ever like them.

Something vaguely resembling his name perhaps? last name being a color or something

I semi agree with the third point.

For instance, instead of DFW it could simply be a character with long hair and a bandanna who represents new sincerity and talks about suicide etc. Everyone on Veeky Forums would instantly know it was him, but to an outside reader he would just appear as another random sage-like individual with a unique take on things.

>workshopped
fuck off, it needs to be raw.

Sir John Clover

One of the "Gods" needs to be Hegel and the character has to interpret a passage from Phenomenology of the Spirit and if doesn't get however close to what Hegel actually meant then he fails. He chooses not to because he knows that he didn't actually mean anything and Hegel is so impressed by this rejection of the dialectic he gives him a pass.

holy fuck i like the premise wayyyy too much
i mean, a pantheon is bullshit, but putting a character before god and basically having this shithead philosophize at the big man is golden

Can we get a discord or some shit
also, more than willing to do poetry

Premise is /writingprompts/-tier shitty

hi
Later in an appendix, the same character should meet a sphinx and explain the plot of nge
but his explanation is actually a summary of Looking for Alaska.

The scene should have absolutely no context but clearly should mirror the same scene in Oedipus Rex.

>last Veeky Forums novel (tLoTiaT)
fucking retard

Building on this, here is an initial list of gods in the Pantheon, + some potential ideas for the rest. I dont think they should all be writers. A mix of personalities would probably be ideal. This is open to discussion though.

The consensus so far seems like the gods, at least the writers, should not be the actual writers themselves but characters based on these writers, so we are running with that for now.

Also just a reminder that we are not necessarily locked into 7 gods, if we feel like it is not enough.

*meant to say Romantic writer in the image

someone who represents normies

Hegel would be great but I'm not sure if we can justify having both him and Stirner. They could be rolled into the same character, potentially.

Let me know what you think.

Keep hold of that idea, because its hilarious.

You mean like a literal Chad Thundercock who fills all the normie stereotypes?

Could definitely work, especially as a counter to the John Green Character.

an idea:
Though we already have joyce from the era, It would be very interesting to add a duality to our green character; my idea was his alter ego as a hemingway type. Otherwise there is no real point of reference for someone who hasn't heard this "nu-male" archetype and it would be an interesting dialectic. Plus there is a lot of potential for interaction between the hemingway facet of the character in contention between DFW and our greek god (traditional conceptions of masculinity v modern day). But maybe im playing on dichotomies too much

Pagan figure has to be this sexy bastard

you might be right too but only because it seems too stunted a narrative. Maybe it would be good to have a forestory for about a third of the book (a university lecturer who kills himself? that seems a bit of a gross idea, but that would give context for his knowledge on all these literary ideas/ his response to the gods. lest the responder becomes incredulous to the character)

Hank Blue
Sarina Singh
Dr. Philip Roberts
Wilhelm Klaus
Corncobs McArthur

>normies
Normalfags

the sphinx has never watched it (besides the rebuilds) so she lets him pass

He enters a modern-style port-a-potty and a long description of his difficulty having a bowel movement with the sphinx begins (and doesn't conclude, it just ends because the writer has met an arbitrary world-limit for the story)

name idea:
der König von Thule

When it comes to backstory, an idea I had is that the backstory of our protagonist could be delved into in the appendix. That way it doesn't bloat the main story out, and anons can have some fun with it.

Once we figure out who our protag is (a university lecturer is a potential idea) anons can feel free to write stuff related to his backstory (with very loose restrictions on creative freedom, since it will be in the appendix). Also contradictory stories are perfectly acceptable, almost encouraged.

The thing is a crowdsourced novel like this is only going to work with minimal plot structure. As it is this will probably be the most structured Veeky Forumswork to date.

Definitely a good candidate to draw inspiration from. I feel like it would be more effective to simply use his likeness though, rather than him himself. Inspiration could also come from the ironpill character, which I'm sure a few of you are aware of.

on the right track

There's already a cuck god, he's called Hephaestus

I suppose this is already nicely structured however? With the seven gods etc etc. I think creative freedoms should be restricted via an astringent (but short) backstory beforehand, introduction of concept and at least aesthetic description of each God. That way, creative and freedoms in concept and plot can be done any way anons would like, BUT the sense of limitation will hopefully (I have faith) prompt anons to at least direct the story in someway close. I rest this on the axiom that although we are shameless, we would be stubborn enough to recognise that it simply isn't good (probably boring) writing and wouldn't submit it. Then again, the meta point has to prevail in the discontinuity and truncation of the story [age of information hysteria that anons minds are prone to, struggle to discern meaning as symptomatic of such an imageboard etc). Its hard, but ultimately it would be more fun if we do lay down some pretty weak groundrules this time.

How do we submit pieces to this?

Make the John Green character Hephaestus then, but instead of making cool things out of metal he writes shitty books about teenage sex for teenagers where he self-insults as the guy doing the sex

Each story involving him must involve a scene from one of these books, where Hephaestus is handsome, has perfect posture, and strong legs.

Here he refers to himself as Dick (instead of John) [something green], ideally they are all erotic scenes that borderline draw lines (and scenes) right from John Green books.

All are written in the same awful style as that scene with the slavic girl.

Other scenes involving him mimic John Green's terrible history videos

Meme Magic

This is actually a great idea. And we all know Veeky Forums are naturals at writing in John Green's style.

I'm making a note of it.

As a flaw to the stirner character I really want him to be anime addicted. Like really into one piece and clannad and shit and thats how our protag gets around him.

>bad anime
his favorite series is Berserk 2016

Well I would think that it would make sense to include an absurdist like Camus

>you chose to wallow in mediocrity instead of embracing the absurdity of existence and live a grand, meaningless life
>no, but you see i already embraced my life's absurdity. For while I masturbated and boldly claimed that males that convincingly appear to be but are certainly not girls being anally penetrated by a female with a penis was not only a superior fetish for a man to have, but indeed was the most heterosexual thing to masturbate to, I also would reply to myself on a Japanese animation website arguing the opposite and claiming that those who do so are indeed gay, fermenting argument and needless discourse, all the while posting clearly inflammatory writings for the sole purpose of receiving digital notifications that someone replied to my post. I did it all knowing the absurdity of it all, but did it anyway, and then went on to give a quick run down of the Bogdanoff's, to which I am sorely needing a rundown of myself:
>-Rothschilds bow to Bogdanoffs -In contact with aliens -Possess psychic-like abilities -Control france with an iron but fair fist -Own castles & banks globally -Direct descendants of the ancient royal blood line -Will bankroll the first cities on Mars (Bogdangrad will be be the first city) -Own 99% of DNA editing research facilities on Earth -First designer babies will in all likelihood be Bogdanoff babies -both brothers said to have 215+ IQ, such intelligence on Earth has only existed deep in Tibetan monasteries & Area 51 -Ancient Indian scriptures tell of two angels who will descend upon Earth and will bring an era of enlightenment and unprecedented technological progress with them -They own Nanobot R&D labs around the world -You likely have Bogdabots inside you right now -The Bogdanoffs are in regular communication with the Archangels Michael and Gabriel, forwarding the word of God to the Orthodox Church. Who do you think set up the meeting between the pope & the Orthodox high command (First meeting between the two organisations in over 1000 years) and arranged the Orthodox leader's first trip to Antarctica in history literally a few days later to the Bogdanoff bunker in Wilkes land? -They learned fluent French in under a week -Nation states entrust their gold reserves with the twins. There's no gold in Ft. Knox, only Ft. Bogdanoff -The twins are about 7 decades old, from the space-time reference point of the base human currently accepted by our society -In reality, they are timeless beings existing in all points of time and space from the big bang to the end of the universe. We don't know their ultimate plans yet. We hope they're benevolent beings.

There will be a google doc soon for the Minor Contributions

In terms of Major Contributions, we really need the Pantheon members decided on, and each of their questions decided, before the writing can really begin.

Once these are decided, the challenge will be put out to the more adept writers of Veeky Forums to come up with short stories to answer each of the gods' questions.

Because there are so few Major Contributions (compared to Minor) and each one has to be somewhat intelligent and thought-provoking I imagine it will work something like this:

- An user puts their name forward to write one of the short-story answers for the god of their choosing
- The user does their best effort and submits it to the thread

- If multiple anons put their name forward for the same god and both insist on writing it, both can write and give their submission to the thread, and the rest of us anons can decide which is superior.
- On the bright side for the user who 'loses', their story can most likely be easily adjusted to fit in the appendix as something non-related or semi related in some way (such as the answer given by someone else before the pantheon, or the protags answer in another timeline, or something along those lines)

ye you prob right he needs to have more esoteric tastes but Id like to see him slip and mention something like sword art online then get really embarrassed

Kek should be one of the gods obviously

I'd like to write a minor piece, what should it be about?

This is good. Then:
> If you feel this way, then wallow in your absurdity forever.

and as a later backstory:
> Camus char in his absurd simulacrum and its not even that bad (just wanks the entire time)

berserk 2016 is nothing to be proud of
youtube.com/watch?v=Ahb1PJquOlU
youtube.com/watch?v=KoMh3XuB784

Never thought of this, but a Frog God representing Kek would actually be really great, almost essential.

Just an idea, but what if Camus's absurdist characteristics were rolled into the Frog God (kek) character?

After all, kek is a chaos god who delights in the absurd.

Or, alternatively, the answer to kek's question could take the form of an anecdote from Camus, or simply have our protagonist blatantly rip off his writing, or even just his style.

What think?

I say we keep it simple as a frog deity of chaos. Almost like sheogorath from TES Oblivion if you're familiar. He asks user what is the greatest power of civilized beings and to that he replies meme magic

What an utterly retarded premise. What monstrous stupidity to believe that anything of any value could result. It's too self-important to be bad even in a funny way. Everyone in the thread, OP especially, should literally commit suicide. I am not kidding. If I could press a button and make everyone in this thread die, I would do it without hesitation, even if as many innocent people had to die. Even engaging with this thread (except in a spirit of perfect contempt) proves you are unworthy of human life, almost animalistically stupid, parasitically feeding on the festering corpse of Western culture. You are less than ants next to even a mediocre Romance novelist. Some of you call yourselves nihilists. So please be consistent and kill yourself, please, I implore you with as much sincerity as I can muster. Please, please, kill yourself.

This will be good material for the appendix

The themes of the novel haven't been fully established, but thats not a huge deal for the minor contributions, since they only need to be tangentially related to the rest of the novel.

Potential inspiration can come from any of the books/authors/themes typically discussed by Veeky Forums, since the whole work is going to contain these same influences.

Or from any of the confirmed members of the Pantheon so far Basically though, its really open ended.

Worth noting, in terms of minor contributions, if you want to contribute poetry it will be used for the interlude section(s) which will take place between the major chapters of the novel, and If you want to contribute prose it will be used in the appendix.

For some added context, all the poetry in the interlude is, within the context of the novel, coming from the voices of random dead/dying souls that somehow find the ears of our protagonist. This doesn't mean that the poems have to be about dying though. They can be about anything, really. just keep this rough context in mind is all I'm saying.

This is a recipe for another meme filled collection of shitposts
If we want to be serious the gods should just be symbolic

>It's too self-important to be bad even in a funny way

There is no reason it has to be written in a self-important fashion. I honestly think the less serious it takes itself the better, just as long as there are some gems of seriousness throughout that get the almonds activated, if you get what I mean.

this

I like this a lot

>If we want to be serious the gods should just be symbolic

This is kind of what we are currently running with.

I think there is great potential to have our cake and eat it too, though.

Like, if the writing is clever enough, we can fill it with as many memes as we want, as long as they are buried deep enough that only Veeky Forums would be able to detect them.

The goal should be a story that a normie could read and not encounter anything that is obviously a meme from some internet forum, while Veeky Forums could simultaneously read it and spot hidden memes left right and center.

Me too. It is noted.

Yes I agree

Interesting idea for some sort of philosophy novel but if we want to write something as a collaboration we should just submit Dubliners style short stories about post modern life

This will be impossible to coordinate and execute

Another God should be Saturn or a similar Sungod. user will earn his favor through his cleverness and the God will reward him by admitting that the Rothschilds have been nothing more than interesting toys for him to combat his eternal boredom. The selfish "reptilians" are nothing more than spooked humans who fell for the saturn meme and became his bit cu. He feeds off their inevitable pain and suffering

This post gave me an idea.

Thoughts on a Nihilist God?

Pic semi related.

I like this, because it it opens the door to all the classic, alex jones style, conspiracy theories. There would easily be enough material there for a great chapter.

Noted, user.

On a more serious note the spirit of Jesus would be an interesting god. He asks user what the most just cause in the universe is. The answer is the truth. Btw this is human revolutionary anarchist Jesus not Catholic Jesus. This is a good opportunity to break down notice psychological conditioning and show them that world peace could exist if it weren't for Saturn's disciples(slaves) and their slaves (slaves of slaves)

Normie not notice. Using cellphone

Jesus is definitely a tantalizing idea for one of the gods, for a number of obvious reasons.

I think that if we are going to have a biblical figure (which just seems like a logical idea), he would be one of the first choices.

Having Jesus as a God would totally undermine the whole concept because Jesus represents monotheism
Including Jesus turns the whole thing into a meta ironic joke

This could be new age Jesus tho. He doesn't have to say worship me and only me. He could be a redpilled Jesus

Make him new age moderate Islamic Jesus

What if he was never officially stated to be Jesus, but just heavily alluded. E.g. just a man in contemporary clothes with long hair and a beard who talks about forgiveness and loving ones neighbour and has a really chill vibe, etc... you get where I'm going. Kind of like in GTA V.

It would always be left ambiguous as to whether it was the real jesus or not though. There would be some opportunities for humor here too, if played the right way.

Unless you guys think it would be better to just have the official Jesus or no Jesus at all. I think either could work.

Greek philosopher should be either Epictetus (he will angrily interject frequently about our protagonists slavery to [insert thing here], or Diogenes, who will just openly masturbate onto our protagonist.

bourgeoisie cuck Aurelius would be better

Could actually do Epictetus AND Aurelius, so Epictetus can comment on how much Aurelius fucked up by loving Commodus to much to do the right thing and kill him.

What if we put some eastern relevance? Such as a Buddhist god?

I'm not a honed writer but would it be cliche if we had the people before user represent certain "sin", where as user could represent an enlightenment of objective truth? But ultimately it doesn't really matter as by winning his trial user is sanctioned to the same fate as the others, but maybe wearing slightly more comfortable work wear.

Yo i wanna write about the numale god.

First we need the question he will ask the protagonist. After that is settled you are good to go to start writing.

The working name for the nu-male god is Hephaestus btw (based on the Greek god who literally got cucked). There were a couple posts ITT about this you can easily find.

I think it would be hilarious if he had the physical appearance of John Green (or very close to him), and its been generally agreed that this section should be written in John Green's writing style, at his most obnoxious (like the passage from looking for alaska, you know the one). If you have another idea though feel free to put it forward. .

Alternatively, if you don't want to be in charge of the major chapter relating to the nu-male god, but still write about him, you could simply write a description of him or a story involving him, or something, which would be great for the appendix.

For the euros/aussies who read this thread while Im asleep, pic related is where we're at so far in terms of the gods in the pantheon.

You can start thinking of philosophical/existential/literary, or even just nonsensical, questions for them to ask the protagonist. Remember, each god asks one question, and the question has to be something no ordinary person would ever know/guess, and should in some way reflect the character of the god who asked it.

Another reminder, the answer to these questions will be given by the protagonist in the form of a short story. I recommend reading the quick rundown in the first two posts of this thread, if you haven't already, to better understand the premise, as well as what each question and subsequent short story should try to achieve.

Also, even though these gods are based on real people/gods, most of them don't have names, or a specific physical appearance, yet, so any ideas on that front are very welcome. Also, any names or physical descriptions seemingly decided are still very much up for discussion.

When I come back, I will add anything that has any kind of agreed upon consensus to the master document I have going.

I think its been a good start so far.

pastebin.com/raw/7Eqvvn04

I just hand-wrote this best get added to the book even if it doesn't fit faggot

Diogenes would be a based pantheon

I have an idea for an opening line if anyone is interested.

These threads are disgusting, how can you even enjoy doing this retarded shit?

Lit won't represent Muhommed?

Fucking kill yourselves losers

it's like you put a bunch of words in a blender

...

This whole thread is fucking cringe.

Recommending
a) that the novel begins with the encounter of user with the gods and then works backwards to describe the apocalypse and answers of the previous participants. This way we don't have to come out of the gate with exposition. If we try really hard we can get it to mirror epic narrative structure
b) listen to c) that the protag's name be Pseudo-Dionysius, because it's an easy pseud joke but also because of his real, actual knowledge being used in order to fool intellectual giants

John Green could be depicted as a cyclops to imply narrowmindedness and stupidity. He could be one of the gods or simply Hephaestus minion.

The people in front of user who fail their test would proceed to be eaten by this Green-Cyclops while he calls them his Cheerios, and when user stands before him he would ensure user not to worry because he would enjoy eating him just as much as he enjoyed eating the others.

Maybe one could use The Odyssey and the Odysseus-Polyphemos encounter for more inspiration. Odysseus calls himself "No Man" to fool Polyphemos and I guess there is some word play that could be done here for those who like to go on about nu-males...

Came here to post this.

Hegasias of Cyrene, the guy who argues suicide was the best options as happines could not be obtained should have some space somwhere. He seem like good patheon fodder

>I'm working with the production of a play right now
>one of the characters sings König von Thule in the play

I was thinking prologue.

we could just have an amalgamation of the great greek shitposters

>great greek shitposters
which one thought beans were evil? I forget.

pythagoras

What if we make it a prologue?

I think
should be the intro quote.

This whole thread is fucking disgusting.

I'd never be friend with anyone of you.