Write what's on your mind

write what's on your mind

The downfall of civilization.

I don't wanna go to work

Retards on the left and right are trying to kill the neoliberal dream

That girls bum

I need to stop fapping because im on a 3 day combo and it hirts my cock, but I am such a stupid lonely 22 year old that anything slightly related to any of the moderate number of fetishes that I have that I accidentally run into I get horny and I am so bored that end up fapping anyways

I want to die.

images on the is2 domain on Veeky Forums don't fucking load like op's image

Things are actually quite nice right now. For as many stressors as I have in my life with school, quitting smoking, and juggling work full time...

I'm working on gaining weight and working out. It's unbelievable how much being physically healthy helps with your mental state and your level of happiness. No longer am I stuck being a hungry skelly.

I feel even more confident in my school work and I feel more confident with women. And to think, not long ago I was in one of the deepest pits of depression I had been in for months.

you were always on my mind, OP

"nice ass"

My roommates are yelling "Fuck me, daddy" out in the kitchen and I just want them to shut up so I can keep reading Oblivion: Stories.

BROTHER

Starting a bodyweight fitness routine + huge reading list tomorrow.

Got 6 months of solitude to turn myself into a super saiyan basically.

Anyone got recommendations for a hermit? things you would do with the time?

Eh at least you have sex drive. I'm 21 and never really feel the urge unless I abstain for like 2 weeks

Do you lift? Do any exercise at all?

i'm a loser and a failure and i should kill myself.

Work out, eat, read. Work out, eat, read. Work out, eat, read.

That's because you are a woman.

>Starting a bodyweight fitness routine
Don't. Do a real lifting routine. The most important part of strength and hypertrophy training is progressive overload. You are going to have a hard time doing that with bodyweight (though not impossible)

You won't become saiyan tier in six month, and absolutely not with a bodyweight routine. Go to Veeky Forums, read the sticky, and Godspeed

Are you on meds?

>tfw no gf
>tfw dont want a job

what was you weight change? and height if you want. just curious.

Unless it's completely impossible for you to gain access to the required equipment. In which case, a bodyweight routine is infinitely better than not doing anything at all

>Wasting God's gift
even if you don't believe in God or even that life is a gift.

I have too much sex drive or something. It fucking sucks ass and I feel like a filthy hedonistic ape. My private fetish life is really bisexual and autistic and I am having a internal struggle between my autistic inner life and my normie decent guy figure that I want to be. The struggle to not fap and excercise and read and work on my craft instead devolve into an ape is tough man. I wish I was above all of this but it's easier said than done.

I'm only up 5 lbs so far, but I feel so much better, particularly from the exercise and my legs are actually beginning to fill out my jeans.

5'10" 120 now 125lbs. My end goal is to get around 165lbs but I know that's a long ways down the road.

Powerlifted for a few years, so I'm no skinnyfat newfag, besides, gyms are out of the question.

That's what being a hermit is.

Gonna use the time to get cut, increase flexibility, muscular endurance, and skills (handstands/planches).

Appreciate the advice though.

You can be a decent guy, and still a sexual deviant. You think all the good you do, is undone by activities done privately in the bedroom, with a (hopefully) consenting adult?
Don't be so hard on yourself. If you keep repressing, you're going to snap.

You're an animal, animals have sex. It is natural and right that you should follow your sexual desires. There are many like you, user

I know that conspiracy theories are bullshit, but talking about it and specially hearing other people talk about it is immensely enjoyable for me. It's my third time listening to this new Joe Rogan podcast full of /x/ and /pol/ tier shit and I should be doing something else and reading actual important things.

>Gonna use the time to get cut, increase flexibility, muscular endurance, and skills (handstands/planches).
Aight, my dude. Sounds like a routine actually worth something. Good luck

You still underweight (BMI chart).
I had similar where I was also underweight and started working out but never got past the 19-20 units.
Good Luck and good motivation.
Never loose it.

In the same situation after this month (and depending on how my interviews go, maybe until next year).

Literally doing the same thing: bodyweight (following BJ Gaddour's routine) + reading list. I'm curious to know what's on your list, here's mine:

Science list
1. Doing Bayesian Data Analysis
2. Molecular Biology of the Cell
3. Intro to Statistical Learning
4. Deep Learning
5. A Student's Guide to Vector and Tensors
6. A Student's Guide to Maxwell's Equations
7. Thinking Physics

Literature list
1. The Synopticon
2. Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire
3. Meditations by Aurelius
4. Thoughts (Pensees) by Pascal
5. The Plays of Aeschylus
6. Complete Works of Shakespeare (mostly the plays I haven't read, Coriolanus, Antony and Cleopatra etc.)
7. The History of the Peloponnesian War
8. Aeropagitica

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

This. And I even lift and run. I have to NoFap for like seven days to be willing to fuck.

I do not know what is wrong with me. Just fuck my life up, senpai.

Learn to play an instrument as well while you are at it. Don't wanna become a muscular monkey who doesn't know what to do with his hands.

I know, I can't wait until I get to a healthy weight. Hell, I can't wait until I really get used to eating 3,500-4000+ calories a day.

I hadn't realized how little I had truly been eating. Probably averaging under 2,000 calories a day.

Thrive to become like one of the guys on that show not just admire and listen to them.

what do you mean?

I should be writing and here I am looking at a random girl's ass on a literature board

disgusting old hag

No I disagree. Succumbing to deviancy related to the animalistic traits that I was born with distracts and distorts me from more important things that require hard work, especially when it comes to the spiritual in my life and craft. There are many like me but I have the ambition within to fight all the mud that drags me down.

Man that everyday stuffin my mouth full with so much food really gets difficult till it becomes the norm.
But the awesome thing with being so skinny is
you don't have to really worry about gaining a lot of fat
because even if you just stuff your mouth with pizza and ice cream
most of it will go into muscle
and the bit of fat you gain propably is healthy for you
since you were missing it before.

You're going to destroy yourself. You bought into a philosophy and ideals that are clearly not suited to you. You'll probably never be free of these urges. Why you think you can't be spiritual and sexually active at the same time shows a lack of spirituality, I think.

This line of thinking will do nothing good for you

her ass

Want to learn how to fight lads. What marital art and/or self-defense regimen should I embrace?

I like tell women. I can't see short women as sexual objects. They are just entities running around. I can hardly consider them human.

t. Satan

It's officially a movement.

Philosophy:

1. The Gay Science - Nietzsche
2. Above Good and Evil
3. Thus Spoke Zatharsa
4. The Rebel - Camus
5. The Myth of Sisypthus
6. Resistance, Rebellion, and Death
7. The Order of Things - Foucault
8. The Complete Essays - Montaigne
9. The Essential Epicurus - Epicurus
10. Being and Time - Heidegger

Economics:

1. Leviathan - Hobbes
2. The Conquest of Bread - Kropotkin
3. The Communist Manifesto - Marx
4. Little Red Book - Tse Tung
5. Capitalism in Crisis - Castro

If you squeezed one philosophical text into your list, I would suggest Beyond Good and Evil or Thus Spoke. Nietzsche frequently changes lives.

I wrote a stupid paragraph of why my brother always said that and realized I really don't get it myself.
Thing is he was obsessed with podcast/late night/charlie rose interviews and now doesn't own his own TV or PC anymore
because he is focusing on follwong through with his passion and make something out of it.

>Idk

I don't care if I destroy myself. I only care about creation, expression, and goodness. There is a difference between a healthy amount of sexuality and love peppered throughout life, and being a instinct and pleasure driven animal.

For sport or for real? For sport: MMA probably. For real, buy a handgun and avoid confrontations as much as possible.

Try mindfulness meditation whenever you get urges.

don't know anything about BJ's routine, but I will be following r/bwf's recommended routine + molding mobility/starting stretching + daily abs and jump roping sessions

if you haven't checked out r/bwf I recommend it as well

Studying anything but pure math makes you a fucking pleb

Math is a spook. It's not even real.

Seriously. People always sayin' being 6' whatever is so great ,but no.
Most girls are around 5'5. It's like looking down at a fucking kid.
Then again tall women make me feel insececure
which apparently has to do something with my penis
according to the only friend who I told this to and then started laughing his ass off.

You do as you wish, user. Just be careful you don't turn into a bitter misanthropist, because the repressed feelings and shame will turn fuck you up, and there is nothing spiritual about that

That's great.

tall women are the holy grail though
why date anyone shorter when all you're going to be doing is take it from her

Mostly for sport I guess but partially for real. Really I just want to sublimate my death drive into something healthy and productive, but I'm also looking forward to health / cosmetic benefits and acquiring a skill set that would help me in a dicey situation.

It's my first excursion into fitness so I'm trying to build the habit with time conservative workouts, Gaddour's routine is just 8 exercises with increasingly difficult variants:

1. Hip Thrust -> Single Leg Hip Thrust
2. Pushup -> Plyometric Pushup
3. Deep Squat -> Jump Squat
4. Row -> Plyometric Row
5. Hip Hinge -> Staggered Vertical Jump
6. Handstand Pushup -> Single arm Handstand Pushup (self assisted)
7. Single Leg Squat
8. Pullup -> Single Arm Pullup

Probably won't get super sayain, but I think its a good start and it's something I can commit to since it only takes 30 minutes (10 minute/set)

I got your back, my boy.
Now kill that WHORE you have been thinking about

Like I said, I care about goodness. That wouldn't fall into it. I have no lack of empathy. I am merely battling demons that seek to drag me down into living hell where I can't accomplish my dreams.

Read Letters from a Stoic by Seneca. Godspeed.

Math is realer than the consciousness of other people.

Not really, it's all on the same plane.

I was waiting for the UPS guy to deliver my new dotted journal yesterday like a kid staying up for Santa. The delivery was delayed due to weather, and I had to postpone my 'Day One' of journaling. The fact that I couldn't just write shit down on any other paper or text editor makes me think I've already lost

Why is it that you think your fetishes are "evil"? Do you fantasize about cutting off people's head?

>realer than the consciousness of other people

the consciousness of other people is not real, though, so that is no big feat

>realer than the consciousness of other people
Said my imagination to the other part of my imagination

What are your dreams? How old are you? What have you done to accomplish them? I'm curious about the life and aspirations of one who posts on Veeky Forums about virtue and goodness

Also, you are not above your demons. You are as much your "demons" as you are your goodness. You should turn them into something you control, instead cowering from them.

Your posts read like a future serial killer

Have I said the word evil once? I am talking about excesses and succumbing to short bursts of pleasure that devolve into pain. As much as a large part of me disagrees and hates my own fetishes they are not inherently evil.

My dream is to work so hard at being the best artist as I can possibly be in terms of aesthetic and technical skill that I blow away all of my low expectations and lack of natural talent that I had in highschool. I am 22 and I have found the light that hard work to the highest degree is the only true way to achieve my goal before I die. I believe this was something already inherently known to all the true masters of different forms of art.

Who said anything of cowering? I am in a struggle of learning higher forms and degrees of self control against my pleasure seeking part of me.

huh. sounds typical (not in a bad sense, just accurate) of the world the book is talking about.

>Have I said the word evil once
You want to practice goodness. You do this by ignoring your sexual urges. Thus implying that your urges are evil, because they keep you from goodness.

>Who said anything of cowering
You sound like someone who is trying to ignore your urges, instead of accepting that they are there, and that that doesn't say anything about your character beyond that you have those fetishes. You are trying to hold yourself to some strange ideal and I think it will bring you a lot of sorrow. I have no idea what prompted this, but it isn't a healthy or spiritual view to have of yourself.

You're taking yourself and your life far, far too serious

You are trying to repress, I think. That never goes well.

You also sound kind of mentally ill, my dude. Why is it that you think you can't be an artist if you have strange fetishes?
Tell me your fetishes, user. Are they really as bad as you make them out to be?

It's been a week since I last had sex and I feel like it's gonna be years until the next time. I feel like it's already been years.

i agree with you user. but do take into account what that other user was saying. it seems like maybe you have a certain disdain for your sexual "perversions" or fetishes? if the disdain comes from the fact that they take up so much of your time and energy, that's understandable and right, but you should not disdain them as bad things in themselves. Seeing them as natural is a good way to rob them of their power over you. Might make it easier to waste less time on them. If you feel horny, just rub out a quick one, without guilt, without feeling like you've "succumbed", and then move on.

A lot of the greatest artists had a ton of sex because part of their creativity came from the same energy source that made them horny all the time. The trick, as your comments seem to suggest that you know, is to control, to balance your drives.

Best of luck. P.S. 22 is plenty young. When I was that age I was spending a lot of time chasing pussy and getting into romantic complications and masturbating a lot. But I was still producing work. Writing, reading. It's possible to do both and they can even feed off each other.

haha you sound like a huge faggot

Goodness not in a good and evil biblical sense. Goodness as in being good at something, or being good to somebody. I am a very empathetic dude and care about other people.

If I didn't accept their existence would I talk of them on a message board? Since when was holding yourself to an ideal a bad thing? You think I sound dangerous only because I wish to strike a sense of ambition for myself in my own words.

I am not a deathly serious person but I can see how you get this image. It's hard to speak truth from my own mind without sounding stern and serious and self centered.

Not trying to repress or impress. Not mentally ill either. You maybe misunderstand me because Veeky Forums isnt the best place to have a coherent discussion.

Write

me'd be a fat boy if I weren't too lazy to buy food

Lol maybe I am but I am pretty confident in my own self examination and life strategy.

You're trying to use a continuum-mechanics model of electrodynamics to create and program a computer with a neural net to handle cellular biology? Or what is all this for?

>If I didn't accept their existence would I talk of them on a message board
No, you acknowledge their existence, you don't accept them. If you did, you would never have made that post. They bring you far too much pain because you think they are wrong to have. It's not wrong, user, it's a part of yourself that you seem to want to bury. And ideals aren't bad, but you must understand that you will never be ideal

Listen, user. You are not your fetishes. It says nothing about you beyond the fetish itself. Please tell me your fetishes, user. I want to understand why you think so badly of them.

Beyond that, this user Seems to have a more healthy view of your what I think your philosophy is.

if only there were angels to answer my calls,
to intervene in and make right our disasters.
if only the sincerity of a thought were enough
to change my life.
but i am here, in these mundane days full of
headlines and tragedies of all shapes and sizes

beauty used to be enough in my younger days
a beautiful woman in my arms, or just a beautiful woman in love, for example
was enough to make me believe this world was somehow redeemed,
that this manifestation of beauty could hold itself above all the ugliness and wrong, all the stupidity, even for a second (see OP's pic)

But now. Agh.
Now is "a time between ashes and roses", and a particularly cluttered and filthy one at that.
Just look at where we're meeting and sharing our most intimate meditations.
This is the world now. This wasteland, literal and virtual,
is the house of our contemporary minds.
How to flourish in chaos and give shape at least to the sphere
of our immediate presence, even for a few moments in which to make a real event,
a real human connection possible!

What would Goethe do?

What would a hermit say to a valley of clouds at the end of the world?

I put my queer finger to the keyboard and post.

Also, you seem very civil and accepting of others. There are people out there who, despite having the most vanilla of fetishes, are egomaniacs and selfish scum. You don't seem to be so, despite your supposed perversion. So clearly, it does nothing to detract from your goodness

What is your fetish? You like getting blacked?

LOL

Why do liberals hate the Bible so much?

Ah, that's all much more reasonable than I expected. On Veeky Forums especially there seem to be people who read the Stoics and then decide that self-control is a goal unto itself. It's not, and it seems a lot of people strive for virtue just to seperate themselves from what they see as a degenerate (a thoroughly de-toothed word) society. Glad to see that's not the case with you. Though as some other user said, many great artists were also famously perverted. Anyway, what's your medium of choice?

I understand you now and in a sense agree with you but you must understand I have chosen a life of constant transformation and self change. I cannot fuel the areas of myself that I wish to change or get rid of in order to fuel the areas of myself that I wish to refine and change. This is not a life of tranquility and peace. This is a life of forging and struggle. I cannot become comfortable because I must turn all the time of my life into as much useful energy as I can.

I possibly sound more crazy with this post. My main point is I am not you and don't live your life but i see your message.

Alright, user. I hope you bring yourself success in your endeavors, even if I don't agree with them.
Man should choose for himself what is important and what should be, and you have done that

should i buy against the day or mason & dixon

I don't have the dedication it needs to get some actual decent writing done, but it's the only thing I really wanna do.

So whenever I try I just sit there and stare holes into the room and get drunk and sad.

Keked yea love taking huge black cocks in my butt and eyes

Nah but I used to and it helps a bit but I think it might be a bigger problem like low t

Nope. I don't know why I have this my family members don't have issues. I want to see a doc but I just did and I don't have money for it. Fuck American health care.

Dude that's a gift. I know a guy who is probably mild autism and he got into pickup and quit then hit on a few hundred girls and now he gets laid by hot girls all the time. He said his motivation was his sex drive and some rich guy linked high sex drive + abstaining and putting that energy into work as something a lot of hyper successful people do. Leverage that shit.

Sometimes life gets in the way of reading books and writing.

kek. Close actually. I'm planning to model poly-pharmacological protein-drug interactions and biochemical pathway perturbations using statistical learning techniques and/or neural networks.

The physics stuff is just for fun.

Write what's on my mind? I hate that sort of question. "What are you thinking about?" is another. "What's you favorite X?" is one more. The moment anyone asks me to explain my thought process everything disappears and I am left being a mumbling idiot.

It's just an invitation to blogpost worded in such a way so as to give this thread the illusion of being Veeky Forums related.