Veeky Forums shares their best *original* aphorisms

Veeky Forums shares their best *original* aphorisms

I'll go after you do, swear it.

My fellow Americans feel compassion when they look into the whites of a foreigners eyes, but nothing when they look at the whiteness of their countrymen's skin...

>If one wants to be what one wills, then one must will not to be otherwise than what one wants; but if one wishes to be known for something other than what one wills, it is necessary that rumor not persuade one to wish for changes in what will or will not be.
- La Douchefoucauld

They say don't fix it if it ain't broke, but if you never open it you'll never know.

see a nigger pull the trigger

"Egyptian posterity is a pyramid scheme."

Donald Trump may be the ass hole, but Hillary Clinton was the one full of shit.

Consciousness is the victory
Existence is the bonus round

bimbler jones'd it again!

A bird in the hand is worth more than two beating around the bush.

If you kill your enemies, they win

Don't be yourself, free yourself

men are but vessels for their ideological beliefs, for the world is so utterly tangled, complicated, and chaotic that the truth can only ever be found somewhere in the middle of competing theories, with a margin of error appended to it.

The time women don't want the world is when they want time and space.

one in the pockets better than two in the socket

If the meaning of life was to be happy, it would hardly be worth living.

itt: anons don't know the meaning of the word "aphorism"

It's very easy to love women, until you find yourself in love with one.

Rituals are the bedrock of life.

Without superstition, reality becomes a supposition.

Oncw you've bothered to masturbated ten times in a day, there's no reason not to put in the 1/11th more effort.

The best insofar

I am sceptimist.

With the spring comes rain.

Más vale pájaro en mano que mano en pájaro ajeno.

2+1 not always equals 3. Two balls of snow and one hot frying pan are not the same as two Veeky Forumsanons and one book

"Having epiphanies to music is cute."

The turd doesn't fall far from the hole

The best argument for fascism is a five-minute conversation with an average communist.

The best argument for Reddit is a five-minute conversation with an average Veeky Forums user.

The best argument for communism is nothing because commūnism is Satanic

The best argument for Lesswrong is a five-minute conversation with an average Reddit user

The pros of eugenics far outweigh the cons

The best argument for active sex is a five-minute passive sex.

If your nose is running and your feet smell, you might be upside down.

There's no handle on a falling knife.

That got drilled into my head back when I was a line cook but damn if it's not just solid advice on people with self-destructive/toxic behavior patterns.

If you are hungry eat food. Food kills hungry.

Unattained love is still called love.
Why do we call an unattained dream failure?

Everyone has to be a Gregory Berrycone every now and then.

Wrong
1+2 implies the same objects being added
assuming anything else, or talking about anything else, is retarded