Write what's on your mind

That image gives me false nostalgia, I was born in the late 88' but I grew up on a lot of residual North American pop culture and the style and attitude of the times were all around me, my family and friends. Something about the innocence and confidence of these old 80's magazine ads conjure memories that I never had, others which I'm still not sure if I dreamt them up.

great, more stomach pain
eating enough is too hard
weed-fucked appetite

After lurking Veeky Forums for a a few(?) months, I've finally decided to read a book.

So I read the first 2 chapters of The Stranger.

It's okay, but the writing style makes me feel like I am Mersault and I become so terribly bored because that's what he seems to always be in the book.

I think I will continue reading it, intellectual flexing contests and what not.

youtube.com/watch?v=UmbeE81YMwc

youtube.com/watch?v=QaP8oZHVDqc

Everytime I see a cute woman I want to kill my self.

And here I thought I was the only one.

People who post on these Veeky Forums boards about losing motivation, attention span and whatever other important faculty they feel they've underutilized are fools. The easiest shit to do in life is to retreat from those things you know are impeding your development. If something is pulling you forward, don't pull back; use the momentum of that force against it and vault over to scramble.

I want to do a PhD in med science in Prague but my (Czech) girlfriend of 5 years wants me to find a steady job (accountant), "settle down" and have kids.

I understand the practicality, but I'm stubborn.

God, I fucking love RPGs. I hope the one I ordered arrives tomorrow. Man, I want to go outside and read and smoke, but it's so gray. You think it's too cold out to enjoy it?

Fuck, I want to get fucking wasted. Franny better answer. She'll probably say no because she's so lazy. I hope she appreciates how much money I'm willing to spend on food to bribe her to come out here.

God, I can't believe I spent 14 bucks on shrimps. What a moron. That's what I get for not paying attention to the price tag- you even looked, dumbass, and you couldn't find it! You shouldn't have bought it. Fuck.

I need to get drunk. Should I finish that Joe Hill book? What am I supposed to do with that fuckhuge box? Cut it up, retard. Fuck me. God, I have to do my dishes. I hate doing the dishes. I wish I had a bigger place, then I would have some space to work.

I've spilled and knocked over a lot of shit lately. That didn't happen before. Oh GOD. Is my brain deteriorating? Am I getting fucked up? Oh god, I'm almost 30. Maybe my teeth will fall out. Alzheimer research discovered a way to regrow teeth. That's nice. If I become a drooling retard, at least they'll be able to fix my teeth.

Oh no. I think I'm gonna cry.

To truly avoid misanthropy one has to live in complete isolation.

What the fuck is that shit

Same feel here

smoke more

I accidentally inhaled some cranberry juice whilst drinking it. I had a coughing fit for 5 minutes and now my balls hurt

Sounds like you have Cannabinoid Hyperemesis Syndrome (CHS), which is a documented medical condition. Do you find yourself dry-heaving after you smoke, and taking many showers/baths to relieve the nausea?

I am feeling happier now. There are a lot of things I want, and almost all of them I can't have right now for some reason or another. I am alone, I have no real friends, but I've always been isolated since I was a preteen, even when I had some friend groups. I can't choose my circumstances, so why should I let them have such an enormous effect on my mindset? I don't feel strong feelings anymore, I can just laugh and get mildly upset, so why not laugh? Laugh at myself, at all my meaningless desires, at my pseudointellectual mind, and most of all, at my constant self pity, or more accurately, my arrogance.

cranberry juice is so tart. i even wrote a shitty haiku about it when i was 12.

i'll be your friend. we can laugh together.

I like these threads because they make me feel like less of a fuckup.

I have a creepy rapist face.

Giving blood has become an obsession for me. They send me a letter announcing when they're in town yet I still find myself checking online every other day to see if dates have been published. Everything else I do seems worthless, so the idea of doing something so simple that might make a real difference to another person has taken hold of me. You could say it's a form of prostitution; I sell my body and get paid in self-esteem. Another aspect to this is that I'm a literal faggot, and putting a willy in my mouth would disqualify me from donating. It has become a convenient excuse for me not to do anything about my stillborn romantic and sexual life, as if I'm some sort of martyr preserving my virginity for the greater good.

All in all a pretty absurd situation. I reckon you could get a good short story out of it if you ran with the bodily fluid imagery and implied a fetishistic motive.

Why is everyone so hypocritical? It's like one thing and hate the other thing, but they are similar. It's agree one thing and want to destroy the other thing, but they are similar. Why am I so hypocritical?

Even after thinking that I've cleared them up like small scummy ponds, I find more. They create themselves out of nothingness to contradict what you are thinking. There is but one way, strenuous intellectual rigor. Something that would require completely changing everything, even things you like, about yourself. I know such a thing is not possible for me to pursue in my current mindset, but even if I did... would I like what I see on the other side?

"Strenuous intellectual rigor" is not the way. You yourself are the way. Change nothing save what you want to change, and hypocrisy will vanish like a stale fart through an open window

I'm wondering whether to re-read the Presocratics before I take up The Upanishads.

Is psychiatry just a meme? I thought I was pretty well adjusted until I started getting emotionally close to a girl and broke out in a cold sweat. I pretty much ran and I think it hurt her. Also I have irrational fears about trusting other people or vulnerability in general. At first I figured it was typical young man angst, but it just keeps getting worse.
Considering going for therapy, not sure it's worth it, though. Money isn't an issue in this case.

Therapy (psychology) is useful, psychiatry (pill-pushing psychology) is indeed a meme.

This.
user needs some growing up.

I've been warming more and more to the idea that we are the room we're in, and that consistent character is an impossibility, let alone consistent belief systems.

It could be a comforting or disconcerting thouht depending on how you look at it. But wait long enough and how you look at it will change.

Neat.

You are right. As a famous samurai said, all that you need is in yourself. And every path I travel down, I see that more and more. I come back to what is most important; what I crave the most. Not recognition or fame or love, but discipline. That is the heart of my issues and the brain of my anxieties.

BTOPOE ПPИШECTBИE

Bce шиpe – кpyг зa кpyгoм – хoдит coкoл,
He cлышa, кaк eгo coкoльник кличeт;
Bce pyшитcя, ocнoвa pacшaтaлacь,
Mиp зaхлecтнyли вoлны бeззaкoнья;
Кpoвaвый шиpитcя пpилив и тoпит
Cтыдливocти cвящeнныe oбpяды;
У дoбpых cилa пpaвoты иccяклa,
A злыe бyдтo бы ocтepвeнилиcь.
Дoлжнo быть, внoвь гoтoвo oткpoвeньe
И близитcя Пpишecтвиe Bтopoe.
Пpишecтвиe Bтopoe! C этим cлoвoм
Из Mиpoвoй Дyши, Spiritus Mundi,
Bcплывaeт oбpaз: cpeдь пecкoв пycтыни
Звepь c тeлoм львиным, c ликoм чeлoвeчьим
И взopoм гнeвным и пycтым, кaк coлнцe,
Bлaчитcя мeдлeннo, cкpeбя кoгтями,
Пoд вoзмyщeнный кpик пecчaных coeк.
Bнoвь тьмa ниcхoдит; нo тeпepь я знaю,
Кaким кoшмapным cкpипoм кoлыбeли
Paзбyжeн мepтвый coн тыcячeлeтий,
И чтo зa чyдищe, дoждaвшиcь чaca,
Пoлзeт, чтoб внoвь poдитьcя в Bифлeeмe.

I was sad earlier but now I'm pretty happy

いまはもう自分は
罪人どころではなく
狂人でした
╮(•˘︿ ˘•)

Nothing broken is ever broken it just has a new use.

yeah. not degrading in a landfill, for example.

There isn't a sufficient amount of words, nor enough digital space on this internet or any other in any potential and possible future, which can hold the sort of emotions the human being goes through and subsequently purges when you kiss your father's brow and he takes his last gasp.

My Old Man's dead, my personal encyclopedia- my book of knowledge long before cables flowed across the blue water's blackest underside and connected continents together. I am unfathomably incapable of fathoming the next moment, never mind the next day.

I lack the sufficient philosophical language to express my thoughts clearly.

i want lunch i want lunch i want lunch i want lunch

while lunch is coming hello english tea cookies :^)! i shall eat u

I got feedback from my learned friend today on something i wrote.

He said "It feels like you're projecting your confusion on to the character. When she was saying confusing stuff to her friend i felt like you were saying it, not her.". I don't know what to make of it. Sounds like i should fucking kill myself.

i have a big girl crush
youtube.com/watch?v=PaZWu0PgV3k
youtube.com/watch?v=ATEdlqlo3pQ
youtube.com/watch?v=_g9wmya2D1E

woe is hunger

Small and thin is the penis I have.

post excerpt

now i want english tea cookies
i hate you

Same.
Im stuck in some middle ground between thought and intelectual intuition sometimes. But I suspect that its usually a "only rarely a man has the guts to confront what he truly knows" (badly re-translated from spanish) case.
Confront" meaning: observe, make something available to conscious thought.

Post part of it and I'll tell you what I think.

t. user

just got my latest rejection:

>This piece has a certain charm to it, especially if you like Kevin Smith movies (like jay and Silent Bob--which I do), but those are not the type of stories we generally publish here unless they are really unusual and strong enough to evoke laughter. This one didn't reach that level for me.

Kinda weirds me out. Like....the only thing similar with kevin smith is it takes place in a gas station, but the tone is totally different. It's not even a comedy, I mean there's some funny things in it, but it's supposed to be a pretty depressing story.

Also chose this magazine because that's pretty much exactly what they publish.

also makes you wonder what kind of writers these guys are, they don't have to say Jay and Silent Bob, we fucking know what you're talking about when you say Kevin Smith. And it's kind of pretentious and insulting when you say, "Certain Charm,"

Oh well though, they're nice enough to give feedback...

I want a qt gf but I also want a qt bf.

So, be different. Rise above it all.

I, as a male by birth and orientation, came across a mutible orgasm.
I feel sick, thinking of it makes me feel depraved and i have a slight urge in my gut to forgett it.

Happy Ash Wednesday, friends.

Can't believe Mardi Gras went by so quick

My sleep schedule is so fucked and by extension my metabolism so fucked that I'm waking randomly at 1 PM, 5 AM, 4 PM, or 12 midnight. It's incredibly disorienting and depressing and I'm mostly running on coffee and cigarettes at this point.

I envy my well-off neighbors so much, they look so happy.

I just wrote that because I'm sleep deprivated and I looked at my wrist

old friends that I
don't talk to anymore
old friends that I
don't joke with anymore
gave me this bracelet
So we'd never say goodbye
a lie we all glorify
a lie that we all fell for
we knew we'd drift apart
but we did not face it
I tought it'd break my heart
old friends that I
don't care for anymore
left me with this bracelet

Sounds very pretentious and emo to me, but it's what my mind shitted out
English isn't my first languange, I'm not even sure everything rhymes

They're probably beating their wives and attempting to solicit sex from minors online.

I really doubt both parts, the dude used to be a police officer.

wtf

I fear the day when I'll have to face what you just faced

Be strong

Or be weak

Whatever makes you happy on the long run

never use a colon after a verb.

gay sex seems like it would be very awkward and tiring

Me too. It's nice to see other people voicing feelings you thought were unique to yourself. But it's also sad because we're still all alone here. A lot of the time, imageboards is the only way I can connect to people. It's hard to imagine all this not being anonymous, having to go through the initial meeting phase, etc. We wouldn't ever get to the point where we could comfortably share things like in this thread.

Eh, at least you don't lack the cognitive ability to do so.

I on the other hand...

HAH!

Frotting >anal sex.

what the hell is frotting? i see this in m4m ads all the time

grinding your junk together through clothes

It isn't through clothes.

that seems gayer than ass fucking

huh.

it is.

But much more hot.

Hmm why isn't it Friday yet. Fuck.

Her

Aй лaйк зe opиджинaл бeттep.

literally this

I fucking hate job hunting.
Come on you sons of cunts, gimme a job, and make it full time. I have skills, just gimme a full time job.

I was job hunting for like a year. I got two degrees, couldn't even get a job at a gas station. Nobody even called me in for an interview.

I just wrote stories about it the whole time.

Penis still hurts when touching and can't get fully hard. I think I should just chop it off.

Time is the most unfair and prevalent force in our universe.

I've been having some sort of erection problem for almost 3 years now, and at times it makes me feel less-than-human, other times I'm glad I don't have to be inconvenienced by all that sex shit. Most of the time I don't think about it, I'm as sexless as a snail or something equally sexless.

It took me 2 years to find my last job. And this was with full-time job hunting. Anyone who was looking for unskilled labor had high standards like 20+years experience, an Oxford degree just to bag groceries at walmart.

I attempted to write, but I was angry, depressed and frustrated to the point I couldn't write. I ended up reading whatever I could grab when I was a warehouse volunteer.

Now that I graduated trade school, I've only gotten one interview and they are still going through other applicants.

My problem is still recent so I hope it goes away on its own, you never went to an urologist?

>an urologist

Sorry, is that wrong? Non native here.

God I hope this story gets published so I can justify dropping out of law school

I have nothing more to say

That's what I thought at first when my dick broke. Nothing really changed since then. What happened to you? I'm curious. Seems like a lot of things in life are smuggled in like that, under the pretense of being temporary. Then they just never leave.

Went to a doctor once, he gave me some expensive tests to do, and that was that.

suicide is the answer

Are you the same guy?

Nothing 'happened', my prostate, balls and dick and the whole area started to feel sore all the time a couple of weeks ago. I live in a poor South American town with no health insurance so I don't even bother, it's not like I'm going to use it anyway.

Anything showed up in your exams?

Generally I must say even not very stylistically complicated English translates rather poorly into Russian, and more often than not results in rather prolix text.

Did you start taking any meds lately or anything like that?

I indefinitely postponed the tests, and then sort of just forgot about them, figuring I wouldn't have enough money for whatever it is, and it's not like I need it anyway, yeah.

It's interesting reading about sex and how it provokes near-religious experiences in some, and realizing that that whole ostensibly spiritual part of it can be removed by removing the physical part. But also it's a bit sad that I won't get to find that all out first-hand because I have something like sexual anhedonia now. It'd be interesting to read about this in literature as well.

Yes.