Killing oneself

What is the most Veeky Forums way to off oneself?
Not necessarily painless, just Veeky Forums


Helium and nukes and my go to
Helium seem a bit more realistic for me, but one enver knows, might as well go to NK on vacation

What do you mean by Veeky Forums? Get to space and then take your helmet off. I'm not sure that's ever been tested on a human, so you'd be the first live expierment. That's pretty Veeky Forums

chlorine trifluoride accident

Is this helium thing real or just a meme? How come someone die from that?
Also, "Veeky Forums way of suiciding" is not very clear. If you mean the nerdiest way to off yourself, then it could be with some fancy chemical stuff, which I know none of.
I'd kill myself by experiencing a huge collision against something.

>Is this helium thing real or just a meme? How come someone die from that?


it actually just gets you really high you should try it.

It works, I tried

>"Veeky Forums way of suiciding" is not very clear
you could turn into a pickle and get drowned in rain

You sound really smart. I wonder what kind of TV shows you like...

>gets you really high you should try it.

why won't this meme die? you can't off yourself this way anymore, they put oxygen in the helium tanks now

It does before you die

Commercially available "technical" helium contains 20% of oxygen, so good luck. Hanging yourself with sufficiently long rope and with appropriate drop distance is the easiest, fastest and painless way of killing yourself, you can easily find charts giving proper drop and rope length depending on your weight online

except in controlled settings, i feel like it's a risky method. the bag or hose fitting could easily end up torn if you convulse. then you're a vegetable

I mean, functionally there's not much difference

you could end up brain damaged and partially functional. the setup is too technical and too fragile.

from massive hemorrhage by taking tons of Sildenafil and then cutting the head of your dick

Best way to leave calmingly without much resources:
>buy alcohol
>buy sleeping pills
>grab a belt
>fix the belt on something and check it to see if it's really firm
>belt your neck up
>drink and eat pills as much as you can
>put on your headphones and play something chill
>eventually you'll pass out and gravity will do its job
>you'll be too weak to fight against it
>profit
What could go wrong, Veeky Forums men?

/Thread

literally why is this allowed

>1.75 minutes to die from a shotgun to head
WTF?

>17 minutes to die after getting hit by a train
These people are scattered along 500m of track, they are dead on the spot.

Not exactly accurate. Hanging when done right takes seconds and is pretty much painless. It's the strangulation that is long and painless, and that's what happens when the rope is too short

are diy nukes painless?
I need to know this. A human body just cannot be vaporised in an instant, righr?

You'll die from poisoning before you even finish building it. Sorry.

It's a four step process:
>1. Get a PhD in elementary particle physics.
>2. boast about it on Veeky Forums.
>3. Get job at CERN.
>4. Throw yourself in the LHC.

This dude wins.

>WTF?
1,75 minutes untill the hard stops beating, I presume. You wouldn't be concious for long enough to be awake for those whole 1.75 minutes, because your brain would be smeared accross the floor.

>Hit by train
>Duration: 17 minutes

??????

I think it takes into account the preparation time before you die.

>1% chance of surviving shotgun to the head

NOPE

I've seen pictures of it before. The guy blew his entire jaw off but his brain wasn't destroyed. There are also cases where most of the brain is damaged but the brain stem is fine

>the hard

Kek
Is your name Spurdo?

>o shid, i god hid by tran :DDDD
>ids been 1.74 mins what da fug why my hard not stob
>ah der it goes :DDDDD

They might think you were masturbating and that would be a rough one for your family/friends. Definitely cut your dick off first so their can be no mistakes

No need for that. Just don't wear your latex clothes when killing yourself.

Sure is summer in here.

>ODing on illegal drugs is three less agony points than ODing on prescription drugs

>Drowning in the bathtub is only seven agony points less than cutting your guds out with a sword

>Cutting your wrists is eight more agonies than getting hit by a car

I only watch sex parodies of Back to the Future

>Commercially available "technical" helium contains 20% of oxygen
fuk, what assholes


ok, hear this out:
I get heium, and hang myself upside down

>you'll die before killing yourself, sorry
what a depressing thought, not being able to even end it painlessly on your own terms

...

THE Veeky Forums

Okay. For this one you are going to need acid of high molarity.
You will then need helium, but not for the reason you'd expect.
You are going to fill a vat of acid, wait up on a building, ToysRus preferably.
There you must attach balloons to a precipiced vat of acid which you will then climb into.
When the time comes, you must inhale, yell out
at the top of your lungs,

"ABSOLUTELY PHENOTYPE"

And proceed to let go of a string holding the acid.

If all goes accordingly you will soften up like a waterballoon and splatter to the floor, the acid will evaporate and you will cover everything in erosive entrails.

Finally, the balloons and the acid vat will float away, leaving no evidence as to who did it.
Bonus points for landing on a car or people or impaling yourself on a spike.

ordered carfentanil for this reason, got caught. probably going to jail in a couple of months

The /DIY/ angry bird.


>Eat explosives
>Put self in a round container.
>Launch self out of trebuchet towards hated enemy.
>Preferably with lots of glass or at a dinner ceremony.
>Explode into a thousand gibs.
>Traumatized everyone for life.

Bonus points for dressing as a furry when you do it for added lulz.

Or you could try to numerate graham's number in your head, that's also a pretty fucking Veeky Forums way to go

Every one of those failed shotgun suicides were done with shot instead of slugs.

>Finally, the balloons and the acid vat will float away
kek