Immediacy-- what are some novels that stylistically convey immediacy in

emotions, feelings, happenings?

I know of Faulkner and stuff like Ulysses, but what I want doesn't necessarily have to be stream of consciousness.

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instagram.com/p/BFrhbWSmF1M/
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extremely loud and incredibly close

The Waves.

Got a source?

>Got a source?
instagram.com/p/BFrhbWSmF1M/

>don't even feel completely present when I'm fucking my gf anymore
What is wrong with me? I'm not even depressed, I just always feel like I'm watching a movie of myself doing what I'm doing, like I'm not really there. I miss childhood when everything felt alive and right in front of me

>be stylish photographer
>women will immediately slut it up for you
What am I doing reading books again?

Are you also often unable to connect recent events with the present? For example, do you often have a startling moment where you suddenly realize what's going on?

I get the same thing you described. I've heard it's from depression

>he thinks sex outside of emotional relationships is going to be fun
It isn't The photographer probably doesn't even get any real pleasure out of it, he just considers it better than NOT fucking gorgeous women

Trust me, no one actually likes it. You fuck and moan and grab hair and put on a whole song and dance, nut, go home, and stare at the ceiling before falling asleep.

Well I mean I do struggle with depression, I'm being medicated for Bipolar II. But even when I'm not in a depressive phase, even when I'm really happy and on top of shit, I'm not actually there. And when I go outside, everything is so bright it just floods my eyes and I feel confused and aimless. My gf constantly tries to get me out of the house but if it's not very foggy, I just can't concentrate the second I step outside. I only enjoy going outside at night

Well, but I'll never get any reading dead guys and writing shitty fiction, which later I'll hate every word of, now will I?

I don't know mate, I've found a pretty good balance

It isn't a binary. Also Veeky Forums women exist out there, my gf is far more well-read than I am

>>he thinks sex outside of emotional relationships is going to be fun
I guess I'm a faggot but I've never found raw sex to be enjoyable, either. I enjoy the emotional bonding, foreplay, and cuddling far more than actual sex. This has led to a lot of problems in my relationships. All the girls I've been with just act like complete animals in bed and it turns me off. They rush into the sex and then do crazy shit like claw my back and bite me, and I lose my hard since it isn't emotional and feels wrong

>I'm not even depressed

Yes you are. Being depressed is not always being sad, it's also just not being able to enjoy or feel anything. They both stem from your brain is not producing enough dopamine or serotonin. Get some help.

>They both stem from your brain is not producing enough dopamine or serotonin.
t. Pharmacy shill

>believing in chemical imbalances

I meant depression in the emotional sense, yes clearly I have some issues I'm struggling with

I'm currently taking Lamictal for bipolar II which has helped massively with my emotional depression and anhedonia but that derealization is still present

>tfw just want a sad cum bb

my protodiary desu

>good goy, your minds are nothing but chemicals, only God's chosen people have souls

You are very smart and have changed my opinions on the things specified. wow!

Holy fuck this is disgusting

t. Jonathan

My life fluctuates between this and an overanalytical anxiety fueled hell of being too present in every atom of the moment to function.

Maybe you'll find a girl who understands and likes it the same way senpai
I do like sex, but only with long foreplay and long cuddling afterwards. By the time we go one round with my gf, other could probably go three, but we enjoy it thoroughly.

Veeky Forums is such a bad place to be... god damn

This is the mental image I'm getting from that photo

The worst thing for me is that in the past year or so I've lost the ability to enjoy poetry, which was once my only solace. When I'm reading it, I recognise when I'm reading something beautiful or moving, but I don't feel the qualia or subjective experience of beauty at all. At this point I'm too afraid to even open a book of poetry in case it isn't beautiful and there's nothing worth living for anymore.

I am convinced that a 24 year old virgin would be inclined to disagree with you.

Kek

>life was handed to me on a silver platter and now I'm incapable of feeling accomplished, reeeeeeeeee it's so tough :(

this sounds like dissociation and if you're overwhelmed by the outside world and if you've been diagnosed with bipolar then I could actually be suffering from some kind of personality disorder. I had very similar symptoms and was treated for bipolar for five years. I saw a new therapist who treated me for bpd instead and now I'm doing much better and am able to connect and regulate the overwhelming emotions better. you should ask a professional about the personality disorder possibility.