This is a short story I've been working on tonight. I posted a lot less polished version of this a while ago. Does Veeky Forums have any suggestions for improvement? Thanks!
Short story I wrote: The Necks Are The Worst
Colton Richardson
Ian King
3edgy5me
Evan Baker
I think you are trying too hard with the whole bit about the light leaving their eyes and how their trust turns to fear and hatred etc etc. Try to put yourself into the mind of the character: would he really be thinking about that, with that wording?
Also- people don't die instantly when you slit their throat
Michael Adams
Depends on where you cut and how deep
Wyatt Miller
>Also- people don't die instantly when you slit their throat
>guy wants to post edgelord bullshit on Veeky Forums
>never watched any gore videos
come on son
Aiden Nelson
...
John Sanders
Wow, this is so scary, I bet you are a real twisted fucking psychopath.
Luis Cruz
protip: a lot of isis and cartel videos of beheadings the dude is already dude, so they just fall over like they died instantly...but there are a couple real ones like that one from the iraq war where some pre-isis sadr city type dudes chop some cia jews head off while he's still alive, he squeels, squirms and gurgles until they get his head clean off...now i think they just suffocate or od them on drugs before filming the decapitation video...there's actually one from syria that pol exposed where some refugee is shown chopping a kids head off but it turns out the kid died in a hospital of some non-war related shit but they wanted to make an anti-islam false flag so they took him out on a truck and chopped his head
anyways, if you wanna write edgelord gore porn, get a clue
Nicholas Kelly
I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not
Jace Flores
then u a dumb mothafucka