Veeky Forumserary confessions. Confess and repent, anons

>passenger
Bus rider detected.

Yeah, but I live in the midwestern United States so its a horrible experience, always smelly old people and negros talking on their smartphones as loud as possible

Not the guy you're responding to, but Britbong here: the buses I've gotten on in the past had scruffy chav teenagers sitting on the back seats, playing loud music through their phone speakers. One time the bus driver refused to continue driving until they turned it off, which meant a 20 minute ride home lasted a fucking hour.

I feel you man

I am busting my ass right now trying to save money for a car, even a piece of shit would be worth it just to get me around town

American literature is all downhill after Henry James

Probably because it's lazy, derivative, and tries to pass as more than YA fiction when really it isn't.

Next thing you're gonna tell me Percy Jackson is some good stuff.

i've spent the last week reading harry potter fanfiction
i liked it

How old are you?

I can't read any book over 200 pages long without putting it down for several weeks midway through.

>Kafka isn't funny. He's a good writer but "Kafkaesque humour" isn't humour
Only one I disagree with. His stories are so darkly absurd to be humorous to me.

47

Nah, user. I'm not that far gone.

This is awful, you have no excuse.

I found a photo album at my uncles house when I was house sitting. It was full of naked women in lingerie, but all had their faces scratched. One photo of a blonde milf in stockings looks spookily similar to how my mom looked when I was growing up. She divorced my dad when she hit 30, enhanced her breasts to DD's, dressed in clothes that shouted confidence. She took myself, my bro two pals and my cousin to cuba with her divorce money. us lads shared a room and my mom had a private next door. I had stayed back to unpack my stuff as the rest went to go look around. I heard voices next door so looked through the key hole of the ajoining door. 'your not my blood aunty, so it's not wrong' I herad my 20 yr ols cousin say as he stood infront of my mom 'all I want to do is see your new tits, please' my mom was sat on the dreeser chair and had on a gown 'just a quick look then leave me alone?' she said before slipping open her gown slowly exposing her naked firm breasts, which quivered in my cousins gaze, I could clearly see both her thick dark nipples were hard, the sight of which had me hard as well. 'do they fell different though?' john my cuz asked, reaching forwards and cupping her left pert DD enhanced tit ' just a quick feel then' my mom said, sliding down her gown further and offered her swollen orbs towards her nephew. 'your nipples are so hard, can they go harder?' john enquired as her leant closer and engulfed his wet mouth over her right nipple. 'easy soldier' she breathed heavily allowing her naked erect nipples get sucked and licked at hungrily. John had slipped down his bathing shorts and his throbbing hard cock was straining at his blonde aunty. I too was stroking my cock watching as my stepmom....

that's one cute dog

>there are people (Faggots) on this board right now who don't like dogs

i read a shitload of YA fantasy (like, unimaginable amount) in the years immediately after Harry Potter ended. age 10-13. like i cant post my entire shelves because i own like 5x as much as YA fantasy as i do actual books

I only pretend to have read Proust :(

nice fanfic user.

At one point I had every first edition of Chuck Palahniuk signed, to me (thru to "Rant")

I own a Barnes and Noble leatherbound classic

I miss taking the bus. You can overhear some good stories on the bus, and really experience some of the dregs of humanity. And you get to just stare out the window and actually take the world in for a while.

My literary confession is that I majored in English at university despite having only read like 15 novels in my whole life before I started. Don't worry though, I've read a lot more by now.

Kafka is hilarious.

It's sad that some of these are supposed to be confessions on Veeky Forums.

>repetitive in their shitposting

That's the point of shitposting, you pinhead fuck-up. Ya spam a lil yecarthy eggs are breakfast pa parody with no punctuation, and ya got yourself a nice lil homage.

i love to read Heidegger but i have to spend about 2 min per page, getting the exact meaning/translation for his works, only to have to turn back 3 pages to find an old example of what hes referring to 14 pages ago about a book he wrote 4 series back.

god damn i wish some writers would just dumb things down for me.

The ass goblins of Auschwitz was a good book

>2 min per page
You should probably be spending more than that one works of dense philosophy. 5 minutes per page isn't uncommon. It's not like reading a novel.

Don't spread lies, user. Nobody dislikes a good pupper.

> implying I don't have a folder dedicated to cute doggos and a sub-folder dedicated to doggos in children swings

I really enjoy feminist literature

African-american literature is also something i enjoy. I think i like stories about an underdog and an oppressor, although i also enjoy the gothic-parody of most feminist literature.

I hope you sold them for a good price, a signed Palahniuk would be worth something.

Absolutely disgusting.

Agreed. When was it so bad to enjoy Orwell or McCarthy?

>Don't force yourself to read. Commit to read 5 pages a day.

Don't force yourself to read. Force yourself to read 5 pages a day. Ok.

> Read various books at the same time.

This is good advise though. I can't read one book straight through very often without getting bored. Before I would have just watched some TV but not I just read another book.

You can't honestly say that reposting some copy-pasted pasta is as fulfilling as actually forming your own opinion on something, surely.

Yeah, I'm liking the foot notes, even though they're like 80% of the books bulwark.

Definitely my hardest read yet, quite the challenge, but I'm enjoying it.

I want to read more books of merit from people of colour.

I'm genuinely interested in historic accounts of slavery, or growing up in Africa, or the civil rights movement, as well as the music of ethnic minorities, food, childhood, etc. I just don't know many worthwhile books by them. Not saying they're not out there, I'm just ignorant to them.

Any recommendations?

> chartposting

You are a kind user.

I would also add "Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man" to the Reconstruction Era (it's a work of fiction). It deals primarily with the topic of "passing" (the notion that some black people were light-skinned enough to pass as white if they spoke and acted like them). It's only about 115 pages or so, so it's a fairly quick read, but it's lean. It doesn't waste your time and covers a lot of ground.

Thanks user, I'll check it out.

I do nothing with my life

w-where do i start then

i, too, also want gucci's autobiography.

I enjoy the idea of reading - comfortable seat, full bookshelves of worthy authors, a good coffee, some gentle ambient music, warm room with gentle lighting - more than I enjoy actually reading.

Which is why most of my book collection consists of Penguin clothbound books and Barnes & Nobles hardbacks. Great for decoration and people can recognise the books from a distance since the writing on the spine of the book is so large and easy to read.

i like book

I wish shitposters like you found something more productive to do with your time rather than half-assedly trying to ruin other people's time.

why are you on Veeky Forums if you don't like shitposting? It makes up like 80% of the site.

I don't know where else I can discuss literature with people who don't exclusively read YA fiction.

Since the "doge" meme, dogs really seem to have grown in popularity online, maybe more so than cats back 5-6 years ago were. Especially pugs, shiba inus, and those big white fluffy cloud dogs.

i have this picture of frank walkin a lil dogman

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wiener-Dog_(film)

Is this movie any good? I've heard mixed things.

it's ok. it's an odd movie but worth a look if yu're into that kinda thing.

whenever i get rejected i immediately fall into the trappings of /pol/ and assume it is a conspiracy of some kind. i hate feeling like this. its weak and dishonest and lazy excuse making. i don't want to be a racist shitlord.

there are white males without connections who get novels published, right?

I took the Stirnerpill.

1) Submit to writing competitions. You might not win but if you're work is liked, you'll be noticed. You can sometimes get connections through this.

2) Diversify. Plays are easiest to get made but screenplays make more money.

3) Self-publish, see how people like it (if they notice it) and then cater to them for a while. It'll show you're self-sufficient, that you do have a following, despite it being a small modest one.

4) THEN consider contacting agents. They don't want to waste their time with someone who only has a rough draft, but if you've worked on developing a career through the few opportunities you've had, they'll more likely take notice.

5) Always accept rejection gracefully: nobody wants to work with the guy who flips his shit just because things didn't go his way. If you have the opportunity, always ask for constructive feedback. Most people will be willing to do this.

6) Try learning what it is to be a good writer. Sure, that's difficult to define, but if you're interested in being marketable, there's ways to cater towards that. Lajos' The Art of Creative Writing; Joseph Campbell's The Hero with a Thousand Faces; Dara Marks' Inside Story: The Power of the Transformational Arc, etc. These kind of books might not be completely useful for what you strive for, but there's definitely information in there you will find useful for narrative structure or developing your own characters.

7) Some companies are pushing for a more diverse group of writers/creative people. This means that out of a white guy being equally qualified to a black guy, they'll take the black guy (in the UK this is part of the Diversity Act of 2010, companies are allowed to do this). Although it's irritating - it's technically called positive discrimination - don't let this get you down. If people are talented, dedicated and noticed, they'll be taken on board no matter what race (in the western world). Just keep at it. It might be 5 to 10 years until you notice a difference, but if you're dedicated and really want to be a writer, it can happen.

8) Sell out the first chance you get. Movie adaptations, re-prints/gift editions, book signings, university tours, merchandise, etc. Fucking do it. We all like to act that we want to follow our passions, and you will have the opportunity to do that, even more so once you've made millions getting your literary dick sucked.

9) Please don't bring /pol/ to Veeky Forums.

thank you, this seems like decent advice

Do Japanese people count as people of colour or is that a term exclusive to black and middle eastern people?

Why would you lie on the internet?

nepotism is a real thing. it happens out there.

Nips are honorary aryans.

Literature is not for me.

I love Kafka's humour. Different strokes for different folks, I guess

why are you here then, user?

Film > Music > Literature > Video Games > Animu and Mango > Graphic Novels > Pornography > Braille on signs for the toilet

You know it to be true.

Nothing is for me really. But a man has to be somewhere...

> accident prone porko puppo getting into accidents
> he's crazy haha he always rolls down the stairs
> the sound he makes running into a wall is the same sound you make when you smack your tummy
> haha what a mad dog haha crazy dogman
> feel bad when he gets into a major accident involving jumping onto the sofa and getting stuck in the avalanche of sofa cushions
> almost lost him for good
> got to save this little dogman for good
> for the greater good i save his life by wrapping him in an impenetrable fortress of bubble wrap and masking tape
> he's so safe forever that when he runs into the door now he just gently pops a bubble and has fun every time
> thank you god i am blessed

>I'm an underage retard obsessed with 'r8ing' and building charts
Nice confession. Don't worry, my man, it fades away as you enter adulthood.

>merit
>3/5ths of that list
pick one

he not like the swing

angery hamster no swing

no
NO

I don't really like niggers or feel them equal to white people. I pretend like I do and try to find reasons to change my viewpoint, yet invariably there's a force inside me that creates a repulsion towards them.

Please recommend better books, my man.

...

Nothing to do with literature, sperg the mongoloid.

Good post.

This post makes me wish I had a little dog.

user, thats racistism!

...

Can confirm. My step-dad let his biological sons ruin his business because they couldn't get work elsewhere and he didn't have the heart to fire them.

I really don't care if I dog-ear my books or crease the spine. It's a fucking book, it's not an expensive portrait. If it deteriorates enough, I'll fork out the single dollar it costs to replace a book.

neither is it for anyone else here, hence why we post on Veeky Forums instead of reading or writing a book

This is the cutest post I've read.

Me too.

Some days I feel like I don't even like literature or anything and then I don't read anything for like 2 or 1 day and just masturbate while contempling suicide desu

haha

Im not