What in your emergency stash?

What in your emergency stash?

A glock with the serial shaved off and a box of hollow points

No dildo?

>not having an emergency door

Tons of porn

a can of spam

several half-gallon bottles of the cheapest vodka imaginable stored in about a dozen locations around mine and my parents' home

A bottle of rosé to remind me of good times with the gals.

A bottle of Starbucks caramel frappucino to remind me that it's okay to be sweet.

Some flour to remind me that I'm the glue that holds this family together.

A grapefruit to remind me that life can be bitter sometimes.

A bar of chocolate because sometimes a girl has to have a little bit of fun.

I usually keep some dried dates and raisins for when I run out of fresh fruit.

a wad of cash and a fake passport

that does more look like a "regular occasion door"

This is painfully accurate satire

You have a bright future in creating kitschy home decorations

>be young (~8yo maybe?)
>had a secret box full of candy bars
>took ages to hoard them, most were probably stale as hell but they were mine
>one day go to get one and my FAGGOT uncle had been into my room while I was at school and eaten them all, just left the wrappers
>literally 20+ bars consumed

fuck YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU

every single thot thinks like this

I have a modified first aid/72 hour survival kit that I added a bottle of whiskey to. No one remembers to include alcohol in emergency kits but it's insanely useful.

>faggot uncle sneaks into your room while you are away and eats all the candy bars you stashed away
>uncle gives you the nickname "squirrely" for hoarding and stashing your food
>nickname sticks the rest of your life

Xanax

I really want you to die

10 cans of this and 10 cans each of several other flavours

incredible

This is a fun post

A pinkie pie plushie with a hole cut in the back.

You gay

Live Laugh Love

Whiskey or slivovitz.

Kek

...

JANNY SEETHING

What was it that got deleted

A bottle of rosé to remind me of good times with the gals.

A bottle of Starbucks caramel frappucino to remind me that it's okay to be sweet.

Some flour to remind me that I'm the glue that holds this family together.

A grapefruit to remind me that life can be bitter sometimes.

A bar of chocolate because sometimes a girl has to have a little bit of fun.

jannies btfo
for me it's a 6pack of beer and a bottle of whiskey

>that does more look like a "regular occasion door"

>Chubby kid
>Been hoarding all my Easter candy, didn't eat any of it because I was a smart kid and I knew there where going to be plenty of deserts and candy for everyone anyways and I could eat that and save my chocolate for later
>Massive hoard because I got lucky and distant relatives visited
>Make plans on how I'm going to enjoy it
>Come hom, mom threw it all away
>Sorry user, it just got, I had worms and everything haha
>Bullshit
>Bitch threw away my chocolate
>Didn't get to even try any of it
>Take a good long piss on her lemonade in the fridge that night

...

Just a big sack of basmati rice, assorted types of canned tomatoes/beans/corn, iodine drops (Sandy hit us fairly hard so I just added it) and a few things of powdered Gatorade mix. Some basic spice mixes as well.