So I was in Toronto the other week to visit a friend who moved there. Him and girlfriend were going to bed fairly early, so I thought I would explore the city as I have never been. Fucking awesome people. Met a crowd at the bar by his house, had a few laughs and exchanged numbers. He said to come by for a pig roast at his house just outside of the downtown area. So he actually texts me, and insists I come, as it will be quite a party. And fuck it was. Those Canadians held it the fuck down. Anyways, got there around noon and they had started the roast. They got me black out drunk almost, I think the weed they kept passing me contributed. But holy shit, such fun. I never knew how much you could get of a pig. I woke up the next morning on a couch, and smelled all the meat they had been smoking/curing. Best. Breakfast. Ever. Some country boy brought a fuck load of eggs, and a dude was outside making giant pancakes in a cast iron pan over the still going fire. Don't think he slept all night.
Tldr; went to a pig roast in Canada and had a load of fun. Look forward to going next year as they invited me back.
Robert Rogers
what a boring story.
Brayden Sanchez
Gay.
Jonathan White
This. It needed more gay sex.
Zachary Flores
What a fucking degenerate
The food parts were cool though
Cooper Davis
Never fear, they raped the shit out of him when he blacked out.
Jayden Robinson
>eh goe to pig roast >pige is on roast >have some beers >pig roast is roast >fun times because have pig >got cool with the pig and the roast
Kevin Martinez
lel
Matthew Sanders
Once, a guy invited me to fuck his wife while she blew him. They served zinfandel
Zachary Nguyen
used to work pig roasts. good times! ate as i served so always full
Robert Kelly
how much bacon do you actually get roughly? Can you eat it right away like OP is saying?
Juan Bennett
>in high school >get first gf >she black >her whole family black >from the swamp >go to family reunion with her >only white person there >they love me >get trashed with her country ass uncle >he calls me his nigga >tells me how he hates other blacks >help the guys kill a pig >string it up and have to hold it still while they slit his throat >help cut up meat and cook >we make pork chops and boudin and roast and cracklins on the spot >grow to hate her but continue relationship another few months solely bc of her fat ass and cooking
Elijah Bell
hi op i just moved to toronto and i have no frens can i be your +1 next year?
Caleb Moore
huhhuhuhuhu. this is funny
Asher Sanchez
you literally cook the whole pig, head and all and just dig away at it.
Nathaniel Myers
So when OP said he was eating bacon in the morning, you don't have to do anything to it? I thought it took more time to prepare after roasting?
Hunter Jenkins
i dont think OP mentioned bacon.
Sebastian Cook
> I woke up the next morning on a couch, and smelled all the meat they had been smoking/curing.
No bacon here
Angel Roberts
How many of you did it take to screw the ostrich?
Jacob Campbell
Maybe it's because I'm drunk as hell, but I giggled like a faggot.
Isaiah Cox
Is it just me or is this story actually about an all night gay orgy?
Ryder Bell
>toronto >ostrich >bestiality >mixing up the commonwealth memes this bad Americans really are retarded.
Xavier Walker
>Him and girlfriend were going to bed user, I...
Jaxon Carter
they were kindly telling me to get out while they fucked I think....
Charles Morris
how the fuck
that is the whitest shit I have ever heard of black people doing
that is straight up hillbilly shit
Ayden Watson
I think he means his friend's girlfriend
Camden Howard
Dems bayou country, boah
Caleb Miller
I take it you've never seen Letterkenny?
Ryder Baker
nice blog post faggot
sage
Sebastian Sullivan
well that is a better time than I've ever had in toronto, glad you enjoyed it
Lincoln Murphy
I had such a good time in Toronto last time I went. I went for work, ended up just staying another 3 days for a little vacation. Didn't even get docked the pay, boss was drinking with me. Nice people for sure.
One day we had a greasy breakfast, indian for lunch, greek for dinner, then got drunk at a bar and went and had late night sushi. I was surprised at how good I felt the next day. Everyplace we went was really good.
Thanks Canada! The only thing you need to fix is your laws regarding alcohol sales. In Toronto, you couldn't buy beer at any store, some province run/company run bullshit.
Angel Sullivan
>never been in the wonderful south of the United States.
Noah Jenkins
went to a pig roast, met the host, nice guy, wearing shorts and an apron - sweating his balls off standing over the pit. spent all night there, got another keg delivered, dude was having a blast. 6 months later he kills himself, had major depressive disorder. crazy that you can just forget about the great times when you're in an episode.
David Cox
went with a friend to his friend's birthday party. they're West African and it was a big family event. only went because i heard that they'd be roasting a goat.
drove an hour to the suburbs to the house and wandered into their backyard. about 30 children/family members, felt hella awkward.
goat was good tho.
Cameron Hernandez
Or he could've already committed to the plan, it's not unusual for people to go sky diving or buy a sports car before they off themselves.
Either as a way to see if doing "fulfilling" tasks will make them see that life is worth living, or just to knock it off the bucket list because what's the worse that can happen?
Daniel Young
I know it sounds fucked, but sometimes I wish i was suicidal. Like, no care in the world. Blow all my savings, rack up debt with no concern, only looking to the next good thing, not the next day....