Al/ck/oholics Anonymous

Your turn. I'll be there in six months. Enjoy it!

tomorrow I am going to get drunk as fuck

What's tomorrow?

Everyone at work has noticed that I show up drunk everyday now but they still haven't said a word to me yet. Not looking good lads. How long do you reckon I have?

Nothing will happen if you stop showing up to work drunk.
If you continue the first time it affects your performance or annoys someone who doesn't like you you'll be out on your ass.

Tomorrow.

Brother I've shown up blackout drunk, reeking of alcohol, face bruised from getting in drunken fights to work before so Im still not sure what it's going to take. It's driving me nuts wondering when the hammer is finally going to drop.

Never put off till tomorrow what you could do today.

what the fuck do you do m8

A white collar job where I deal with the public. Honest to God I'm not proud of myself but how the fuck am I I still employed? I've worked blue collar before and that kind of behavior was glossed over because you had literal meth and heroin addicts getting fucked on the job site and most of the other guys were "functioning" alcoholics.

Weak manager? Some bosses avoid confrontation as much as they can until things get really bad.

You're probably right. This place is full of women in management. The funny thing is when I was digging ditches and laying pipe plumbing I never worked drunk no matter how miserable the fucking work got.

>This place is full of women in management.

Ding ding ding. Women are fucking hopeless in management. You might have a job for a while provided you don't abuse anyone. I'd try and get it under control though, Even at my worst I didn't come to work drunk. Maybe hungover as fuck but functional.

I'm going to hell anyway, why not take the express?

Because liver failure is supposed to be an awful way to go.

i feel like whenever i drink i pee way more than is normal. but more than other people do when they drink, as well. it's actually gotten so bad that I have to wear diapers when I drink because it even dribbles a bit

Stop letting your boyfriend massage your prostate with his dick.

Shoutouts to the guy who fucking died last thread

You mean the leaf who drank some hand sanitizer, that was ethanol based, didn't have anything really bad in it and posted in the morning, very much alive?

No the man with coffee ground shits to was immobilised by pain

Maybe he just ate a lot of beans?

Nah that sounded really bad. Seen what he described quite a few times, it's pretty serious

back to the real world lads

Nah he also said his tolerance was cut in half, his liver died that night

How many marijuanas do you inject

Fuck that, how many acids do you inject?

I caved and bought some beers along with some Thai food for dinner.
Would you believe I just had two beers and am done for the night? I actually feel really great. Really mellow, I feel like a massage but it's 10:35pm and the only place I'll be able to get one is at a brothel and it'll cost a shitload.

Fug thats bad man. How are you feeling? How long were you in for?

That’ll learn you for cannabising. May god have merci on you’re sole.

>crashing on friends couch
>they both have exams today
>it's 9:00 am and I still haven't slept
Fucking kill me, I'm useless. The only thing I have going for me is that I'm handsome and funny.

>9:15 am
>keep hearing friend delay his alarm
>other black friend is listening to death metal I've shown him, breddy cool actually
>I just want them to leave so I can day nap like a huge piece of shit

Why can't you day nap now

Careful man. I know that feeling of being content with a couple drinks after being sober for a stretch prior, but it always ramps up.

Dad's in jail today
His friend just dropped off his car
Power's out for some reason and my phone is running outta battery
Bought a liter of gin from the corner store since i'll need something to do in the dark

Was 3 days sober :(

How do I into liquor? Any al/ck/ infographics?

Never really had much of it cos I've always stuck with beer. I want to get rid of my excess chub.

People here are drinkers not brewers or tasters

Just buy a cheap 1l bottle of 40 percent gin and a 2l of sugarfree tonic.

But I want variety in my drinks :(

Get a handle of plastic bottle vodka and 10 kinds of Gatorade to chase it down

Just to let y'all know, I'm a senior in chemical engineering and a functioning alcoholic. I've got a test tomorrow in mass transport phenomina, but I'm drinking 16 oz natty light this morning that I picked up from the corner store. Really need to study but I've been on a bender for several days now. I need to quit drinking.

no dude - push through!

Too late.

Such a monkey wrench in my week. I was 2 and some days into a fast to heal myself as well.

you will feel so much more comfy if you dont smash it tonight tho just get a lil tipsy and doze off

A liter isn't that much between passing out and hair of the dog. I'm typically a liter plus drinker anyway. Ty for the concern though

You people need to go to NA or AA or something.

Get vodka, gin, whiskey, rum, tequila. Bottom shelf of course.
Get coke, orange juice, multifruit juice, and gin. Or just an ice cube and water.

>Alcoholic discussion thread on an Anonymous image board
>not AA
Go pray Jesus somewhere else.

>type one diabetes
represent
something interesting I learned recently is that psychiatric conditions are co-morbid with type 1 diabetes
sorry for the slow response btw, fell asleep

Do all of us got t1 betus?

I have an office job and deal with escalated customer complaints. Been drinking a bit at lunch for the past 6 months. Now I have over a 750ml habit, usually have a drink on my way to the office and all day. Honestly they must know but haven't even led on a hint they do. My preformance has gone from the green to yellow metric and we have team members in the red so I'm not too worried.

I want to quit and find a new job, drinking is a way I cope with hating this job and the customers, but can't get unemployment bux if I quit so I'm hoping I get fired (and not for getting too sloshed at work cuz I'm sure that blocks you from collecting neetbux)

Drink water and eat lotsa salads with red meat. Booze ain't that bad if you've got the rest of your habits on the plus side

Damn. What did your old man do?

Relapsed after ten days.
Feelsgoodman.

If you want to lose weight and still get drunk then stick to vodka, fix up your diet, and exercise more.

Pretty sure I've consumed at least 40 ounces of malt liquor every day for the past two month

Am I an alcoholic yet?

I wish there would be a ‘super size me’ type movie, but with alcohol all day every day instead of mcd’s. I’d watch. In fact maybe I’ll make the damn thing.

Relapsed after 95 days. Feels sad mang

Not sure. Went through his phone that his friends brought home. Calls to his lawyer and his beat friends. He didn't ask for his medication so I'm guessing he'll be home tomorrow. As long as he didn't kill anybody with his car he's probably alright.

Most people itt have been in jail

Yeah, the only reason I started drinking so bad was because of the severe anxiety I get from dealing with all these people, mostly the fucking women though. When I was working in jobs where it was just men I was still anxious but it was bearable enough to deal with it and not have to drink.

How do you quit drinking when all your friends and fellow classmates all know you as that guy whose always down to pound some brewskis? I feel like I'll lose people and connections that may be important to me down the road. (Oil and gas)

Damn. 3 months. I’ve only managed that long once, now 14 years ago.
I feel great right now. Just chucked an ocean of nicotine, tramadol, weed, booze and lorazepam at my brain after 10 days on the wagon. The feel I’m going to have when I wake tomorrow and realise I fucked up, ooft. Not looking forward to it tbqh phamalam

You're probably diabetic.

No you only get the badge and certificate after 3 months.

What's the problem chief? Are you also the guy that's known for doing reckless and regrettable shit after pounding all those brewskus?

Yes. The list is endless

Well I'm on my way then

Prediabetic for certain

I'm drunk right now and it feels so good. All you AA faggots are really missing out

My history medium length
>get drinking after work with colleagues
>I like this
>Always drinking after work with colleagues or friends
>Always drinking after work with colleagues, friends or alone
>Always drinking now
>Health issues
>Stop drinking, lose job, friends, colleagues
>New job
>Drinking with colleagues starts again
>Health issues start again

As I sit here in a pub drinking the feeling of déjà vu and repition and life is just the same old shit day after day is making me feel bored and wanting to drink. A lot.

That's why we have kids, buddy

You deal with monotony to observe the hopeful try their luck

can't stand the little brats and they would get in the way of drinking

Well then there's sports

Not that guy, but dude I can’t even lay down without getting out of breath.

Never stopped my dad from enjoying his alcohol.

I miss when it felt good.
It stopped feeling good after a while.

LMAO

I meant watching sports

drinking is a sport right?
you need to train for it
doing a lot of it makes you better at it
do too much and you risk injury

all I need is corporate sponsorship

I'm getting breathless doing normal stuff and getting pains left side of body
hearts fucked and spleens swollen I guess
damn you alcohol... better have a drink to relieve the stress of drinking

tonight I am going to get drunk as fuck

youtu.be/E8gmARGvPlI

Holiday season soon guys

Reeeee

Jesus lads, it's not that hard to at least do calisthenics to keep yourselves in shape. If you have severe self-loathing you can also buy a heavy bag and do 3 minute rounds imagining you're beating yourself up.

t. degenerate work drunk

Gonna die alone lads

>implying I gave my heart to anyone last christmas
>or the christmas before that
>or the christmas before that
>or the christmas before that
>or the christmas before that
>or the christmas before that
>or the christmas before that

>implying this isn’t the only Christmas tune. And that Sarah isn’t the only waifu
youtube.com/watch?v=7gzJFwB0JzE

Pretty gay T B H

I get a lift to work and back
I sit all day in an office
Shops are a minutes walk from my house
Throw in drinking and I have no time to exercise
Unless you count lifting bottle to mouth and walking to toilet as exercise

Get a gym membership and just drink faster post workout

I'm not having a gym company direct debit money out my account every month for something I'll start then give up on after a few months

I would watch that.

I watched a documentary on HBOGO called 'Risky Drinking' the other day. The last guy chronicled in it is practically that. At a 0.43 BAC he was having full body shakes. It was amazing to watch.

That's why I said calisthenics. You can do them in the comfort of your own home. You won't get yoked but will keep the weight down which is the worst for chronic illnesses.

Only Egyptian Pharos, Xin dynasty folk and the like got to die in a room full of loli concubines who’d been put to death and entombed until this day at the time of their death, and even then, they were dead when it happened. Even the most powerful humans ever to live experience at best cruel and fabricated glimpse at what it’s like to take someone’s hand to the gates of eternal non-existence. Everything dies alone.

>Mr.Cheerful These books
My childhood

I've actually lost weight these last few months
... Wait that's bad right

Someone needs to update these to modern life
>Mr. Internet Troll
>Ms. Insinuated Rape Claim