Haiku Thread

Toilet bowl with stale water
I sit on it
Splash!

Many files in my folder
Choose the smug green frog
Graciously receive four (You)s

Wind whispering
In the bushes of sakura
OP is a faggot

...

None of these are haikus.
Five syllables, seven syllables, five syllables - that's a haiku.

For example:
>Ein Haiku ist ein
>Gedicht aus siebzehn Silben,
>das niemand versteht.

Didn't manage to translate that one.

Fat body hanging in front of me
The swing of my sword
Splash! - his blood

Ich würde gerne
deinen Anus durchboren.
Bin homosexuell.

Summer,
on a summer day.
An unexpected gift.

I'm a lifeguard now
I look at ass all damn day
Go home and watch porn

If you actually knew what you were talking about, you would know that most poets only followed the form very loosely, even Basho. But you don't know what you're talking about, so why come in here posturing?

Na, geht doch.
(Bis auf die letzte Zeile.)

dassum existential stuff mang

>very loosely
That's bullshit. Of course there were exemptions; nevertheless not everything written in three lines is a haiku (as a lot of people seem to believe nowadays since "haikus" are kind of in vogue). If you just want to ignore form completely you shouldn't lable your poems in a way which indicates a certain form - they are simply formless. If you write a poem consisting of seventeen lines it's not a sonnet and three lines à la 16 morae/21 morae/three morae are not a haiku. You might call it "haiku-like" if it gives you a boner, but it's not a haiku for sure.

You're on Veeky Forums nerd.

>not rigidly conforming to 5,7,5
>chaotic sentence stresses
>no rhyming (yes, the first and last lines rhyme in excellent haiku)

>poetry

based poetry user understands

Should we not be excellent on Veeky Forums? Do you lot believe you are incapable of following haiku format? I think you can. We could have a Veeky Forums haiku collection if any effort went into this.

honestly not the worst life

Haiku loosely follows that rule but it is more important to include the cutting word and seasonal reference. Otherwise there's no point without that poetic effect, just literally saying anything as long as it adheres to some arbitrary structure (i.e. all of Western haiku)

Tfw people don't know this is a Zizek haiku

The anus is sore
Many large negro tree stumps
Have been through that door

This Is Huh... Wow!