Burger Thread

Europeans are asleep. Quick, post burgers.

That's a sandwich.

FUCK.

OFF.

i never understood how to properly eat burgers this big

1 patty is the ideal burger. 1/4-1/3 pound. Any more is too much. This is only hersey if you are a fat fucking slob.

>he doesn’t know hamburgers originated in Europe
Retard.

How dumb do you have to be?

I recently realized that I don’t like burgers. They all taste the same to me. From farmer boys to five guys and in n out it’s all the same.

He was referring to the height of the burger you retard.

You can still use cutlery no matter how high the burger is retard

>Tfw Eurocucks think horse meat tenderized under a fucking saddle can hold a candle to the culinary engineering and gastronomic marvel that is the American Cheeseburger. Or that the two are comparable.

Just admit that the unofficial national food of the U.S. is the perfect meal.

It's faggotry like this that makes me think /pol/'s theories about soyboys might be right.

> Butt huw do i eat bige burger n at sam tim into sucking my wife's boyfriend's cock??????

You fucking PICK THE BITCH UP, COMPRESS THE BITCH DOWN, AND EAT THAT BITCH UP. And if some of the burger falls out and into your wittle platy-waty you PICK THAT SHIT UP AND EAT IT. Then you take your date, with her small tits and thick ass, and dick her down like you just dicked down that delicious meaty, cheesy, umami, concoction.

I mean your ancestors ripped the throats out of antelope with their bare teeth ffs.

>testosterone levels are just a theory

> tenderized under a fucking saddle
This is a false origin myth made up to go with the "savage tartar horsemen" etymology which is also completely made up. Also stop being such a pussy

t. history minor amerilard

Mayor McCheese will slap your shit.

Dubious.

Yeah tartare is def the origins of the American Hamburger. Never mind the fact it isn't cooked on a grill or flattop or in a broiler. And never mind the fact that the first time Europeans where served hamburgers was on sealiners BOUND FOR AMERICA. Eurofags definitely invented the hamburger. Foooor suuure. I just wonder where? I mean the the British have always been too hung up on fish and chips, meat pies, and eel jelly. The Germans have been too busy eating everything to come out of a pig, save the shit. And the French STILL consider the cheeseburger to be a culinary vulgarity. THE FUCKING POLISH MUST'VE INVENTED IT.

Saying the Europeans invented hamburgers is like saying the Nazis put a man on the Moon.

...

I do not eat beefburgers.

how's the hypertension going

Mate, that's a scotch egg sandwich.

Right, but it doesn't reduce the height of the burger. You still have to unhinge your jaw to wrap it around that pillar of meat.

> like saying the Nazis put a man on the Moon.

they actually did.

the only reason anyone has been to space is because the US took 15,000 of the nazis best and put them in positions of authority throughout the united states military-industrial complex and scientific apparatus. attempting to make rockets based on stolen plans didn't work, interrogating the nazis to have them explain it for us didn't work, it took actual nazis to make actual functioning spaceships. they understood vibrations and harmonization in ways we didn't.

>Implying Goddard did nothing

I love these.

...

Right over your head, eh?

Everyone who isn't a nigger knows about the relevance of the V2 rocket program to modern rocketry and aerospace engineering, Operation Paper Clip, and von Braun's contributions to the Saturn V Rocket Program. What I was saying is that despite the fact that the seeds of the Moon landing were planted by the Nazi's, actually landing on the Moon was done by America. And off of that I made a simile to the origins of the hamburger.

BTFO, Brainlet.

Ewh boi, what a burgie.

Ewh boi, what a burgie.

Ewh boi, what a burgie.

Ewh boi, what a burgie.

...

Can you get these in the U.S.?

Ewh boi, what a burgie.

Not gonna lie, as toxic as McDonald’s is they have a lot of flavor. How do they do it?

I just cooked a beef patty in a pan with water, smothered it with Tabasco sauce, and ate it between two pieces of boule bread. I should have salted the patty before cooking it, but I forgot to. Does that count as a burger?

But you literally wrote
>like saying the Nazis put a man on the Moon...
I don't think you mean what you logically inferred, friend.
Words, are important.
If you meant "Nazis never landed on the moon" say that.
Don't just flippantly rhetoric when you are analogizing.
Keep them separated for hecks sake user pull yourself together.

They've been a part of KFC's menu for years. It should be there.

>PICK THE BITCH UP, COMPRESS THE BITCH DOWN, AND EAT THAT BITCH UP
Holy cringe. I bet that sounded really masculine and cool and your head when you typed it.

That little snippet has more testosterone than you ever will, cuckboy

Made everything from scratch the other night. Used my dad's burger recipe with chopped bacon, a cheese sauce, and buns

maybe its the picture but the bun looks a little underdone. meat looks good though

Americans and their burgers.
God bless.

Like an idiot I didn't roll the dough so they cooked all uneven

>implying that a nice skirt steak, tenderised under a saddle, then grilled on a campfire after a long day of riding isn't godtier
An American friend of mine actually taught me that trick, and I still remember the way he made it as being the best damn steak I ever had.

You fucking donkey

No lie that actually sounds legit. But it's not a burger. That's the point I was making.

Eh, I think it was easy to infer by anyone who has a reading level higher than 8th grade.

>or watches Rigband Morchie.

>Implying we aren't just memeing here, fren.

Ewh boi, what a burgie.

At least a 1/3 lb. burger is more intuitive than a 150 g. or a 1/7 kg. burger.

> Metricucks BTFO

Ewh boi, what a burgie.

It is 100% legit. We even tried doing it carne sada-style, on a bun, with typical hamburger condiments. Literally a steak hamburger.