English Major Feels

The only reason you made this post is because you're hoping for a specific type of response.

I have to imagine that's because of the general hegemony of leftist writers students are made to study. You know what I mean? It's a cultural kind of thing. You'd be a rightist if your curriculum consisted of Evola Stirner and whoever the rightwing equivalent of Marx is.

And that's only for humanities students anyway, all the autistics and spastics in math/engineering are more right leaning anyway

>autistics and spastics in math/engineering are more right leaning anyway
I'm an autistic engineer and literally do not give a fuck about politics. All of my professors and classmates are the same. We are too busy actually caring about our subject matters to worry about banal shit like that.

>English majors
>well-read
It's like the distorted, politically-charged way they read literature makes makes them less intelligent.

That's true; I should've said the ones who are interested in politics

That's a much easier way of saying what I meant.

I graduated as any English major just a year ago and experienced none of this.

Except that the majority of philosophers through the ages hasnt been "progressives"

There's no way this is actually true. This just sounds like a dumb right-wing stereotype, that colleges are nothing but Marxist indoctrination centers. There's just no way it stands up to reality.

>99% of class mates are female

Have you not gone to college/university? I wouldn't believe it either if I wasn't seeing it firsthand.

>every american novel ever written that features 2 male protagonists are definitely gay and represent the author being a closeted faggot

I'm not OP but at my university the philosophy, history, and classics departments were fine but the english department was pretty much exactly as he described.

I'm an English major and I haven't experienced any of this. It obviously varies by university.

I went to college a few years ago, was an English major but also took some Psych and gen ed courses.

I honestly didn't see this. Most of the classes were just very "here's what we're learning, this is what it's about". So if we were reading a poem from the mid 1800s it was just about the guy and what the poem was about. And in the psych courses it wasn't "here's why people are oppressed", we were just learning about things like conditioning, mental health, etc.

There were virtually no politics at all in my courses.

You don't know how good you have it. Being a conservative English major was suffering at my university. Literally could not give an opinion since I would get talked over by other classmates since I am a straight white guy. Kept getting B's and C's on essays and critical interpretations until I stayed on the Left's political line and fed the teacher utter bullshit, then got straight A's since they saw me as reformed. It was basically a joke degree.

Politics is banal?

Hey! That's just like my BFA!

You can always tell when someone isn't an English major when they make these complaints, this shit doesn't happen except for very particular courses devoted specifically to different critical approaches to literature, and even then they are ideologically varied. Just because we aren't all fucking Cleanth Brooks anymore doesn't mean English departments are some fucking leftist propaganda machine. Theory doesn't become a major component of your course work until graduate school anyway.

yeah, it's so obvious these guys have never spent a day in a university classroom, why do they waste their time posting this crap

Stop undermining my "lived experiences", man.

>doesn't mean English departments are some fucking leftist propaganda machine.

Kek. Yeah, okay. Try to put forward a paper with any readings that would oppose Left-wing/Marxist interpretations and I bet your professor will treat it fairly and impartially.

I'm not even that Right-wing really but you are a legitimately delusional person if you think this shit.

>tfw classmates didn't even read outside of class
Well, at least I don't have to deal with having friends anymore.

>one of the only straight males in your program
>classmates unironically like Rupi Kaur
>classmates hate modernist works because they're too difficult
>classmates start discussion with if they liked the book or not
>being the only person in class who read for the day
>those concerned stares when you argue against feminist readings
>surrounded by not only English majors but sub-human English Ed majors
>"I chose to be an English major because I enjoy reading"

I submitted a paper to a 70 year old feminist professor over The Waiter's Wife by Zadie Smith about how a Hindu-British character had a conservative philosophy (and hated his Muslim co-workers because he thought they were lazy) and was being fetishized by wealthy liberal play directors who kept sexually harassing him and patting themselves on their backs for being progressives.

I'm a liberal, but my paper wasn't exactly liberal, and I got an A.

So, yeah, it's not a good idea to submit "I want to rape and kill all niggers just like my boyfriend President Trump" as your paper but you are really exaggerating things.

Not the other poster, but I still feel like I have to blunt my papers to make them acceptable whenever I take conservative positions. There's only one professor in the department I feel I comfortable not doing that and he's on death's door.

Just go to the library and educate yourself. I don't mean quit university; by all means, follow through and get your degree, just don't buy into their reading lists. Sometimes it feels like the study of literature is a joke and you're on your own against the world, but if you actually dig through the history of literary theory and criticism, you'll find this has only been the case for a very short time. The people they hail as gods (Butler, Spivak) are nothing in the major scheme of things. There's a treasure-trove of useful and sane tools for the analysis of literature out there, they're just gathering dust in the library because today's """professors""" haven't even read them, let alone teach them. Sit your ass down and read some narratology, New Criticism, T. S. Eliot and Edmund Wilson. You'll be fine.

Sick wojuan

>turn up to my first English class (on Milton)
>tutor begins the class by having us sing The Internationale
>asks us what we thought about Paradise Loft
>everyone hated it because it "justifies and perpetuates the patriarchy"
>I object saying that such a reading is reductive of Milton's intent of justifying the ways of god to man, at best
>several girls and one guy run out of the room, crying and calling me a rapist
>the students whose interpretation i disagreed with react angrily at me for mansplaining and hate speech
>the tutor looks me straight in the eye and asks me if i am a cismale
>i tell her i don't know what that is
>she calls security and they hold me down while the tutor dyes my hair green
>i protest but am powerless
>i see the tutor brandishing a large pair of scissors
>please don't cut my hair too, i say
>that's not what i'm going to cut, she says, and i hear a loud crack and feel a horrendous pain in my genitals
>before i black out from the shock and pain i see her hold up my penis to my face and tell me that perhaps now i will accept the reality of the determinate relationship that the base has with the superstructure

well that was some weeks ago and i can happily say that i am no longer an oppressive cismale but a tolerant and progressive gender-fluid transnigger (i can say that because black is my state of mind) who is fully committed to destroying the system of violence that constitutes the western world. i love being an english major.

But where I itty now, O my brothers, is all on my oddy knocky, where you cannot go. Tomorrow is all like sweet flowers and the turning vonny earth and the stars and the old Luna up there and your old droog user all on his oddy knocky seeking like a mate. And all that cal. A terrible grahzny vonny world, really, O my brothers. And so farewell from your little droog. And to all others in this story profound shooms of lip-music brrrrr. And they can kiss my sharries. But you, O my brothers, remember sometimes thy little user that was. Amen. And all that cal.

I mean, you know there are other schools of lit crit. If you really want to stay apolitical, you can do narrative theory shit. That's pretty popular right now. If you get good at it you can probably get a scholarship for an MA or PhD program at Ohio State, which is one of the better Narrative Theory programs in the nation.

Most undergraduate programs don't really expose their students to critical theory. Some will give their students a small taste of it and usually start with the basics, which were usually structuralists or Marxists, because that's what a lot of later critical schools were responding to. It sounds like he got a basic overview of some lit crit in his undergrad program and took it the wrong way.

So they put you in your place and then you were so infuriated that you came to Veeky Forums and phrased the story in a way that shows them oppressing you?

I get the feeling that not only are you an idiot but you are a pussy as well

Which is deplorable. There should be one literary criticism course in all English departments. The problem is no one wants to teach it and the departments don't think it's important. I'd kill for that class.

>Triggered this hard

English major detected

t. cuck english teacher detected

thinking an english teacher and a literature professor are the same thing, kill youre self fag

>gets so emotional that they end up doing the very same thing that they are trying to criticize
>totally blind to the hypocrisy because hypocrisy ends where my feelings begin

possible womeme posting

>tfw chemical engineering major
>trying to into philosophy and literature
>How do I relate Wittgenstein to Mccabe Thiele Diagrams?
confusing times

anyone who doesn't think this is funny watches sissy porn while shitting into a diaper

this nerd really took the time to write this

I just graduated in May and saw none of this outside the women's center and the multicultural center.

I feel like you're just experiencing extreme confirmation bias of some kind.

My dissertation was literally titled Pinko Scum: Why People Who Follow Marx's Doctrines are Gullible Idiots and I got a 60/50

>those concerned stares when you argue against feminist readings
>Arguing as to why the lense being used is wrong instead of the quality of the photo it took
You should probably not be an English major. Maybe switch to trade school.

Probably because your conservative opinions don't belong in an analytical paper, they're poorly reasoned, or there is no real state for politics in what you're discussing. Stop blaming the system.

i was a real marxist dickhead in school during my history degree and did some materialist interpretation of every situation ever covered in every class, i did ok, but believe it or not most professors, while obviously familiar with marx and marxism, are not really eating it up, when i was in school in the 2000s the whole "human agency" was the real fad, i got told all the time how "economic determinism removed human agency" blah blah blah. although the couple professors i knew who were straight up out of the closet leninists were both in the english department, i chilled with them but never took their class cuz i was a lazy student and it would be awkward to force them to give me a B- or something hanging out

this is the real reason "conservative papers" end up getting shitty grades, putting a bunch of angry foxnews talking points in a paper you whipped up at the last minute is not going to get a good grade

To those providing conservative readings, what works did you base your readings on? Who are the contemporary conservative literary theorists?

>use RateMyProfessor to avoid any nonwhite, nonmale, or jewish professors, where possible
>only about half of them are open marxists, and they at least lean toward intellectual honesty

comfy-mode desu

female english teachers are pure cancer 90% of the time tho.

Man, I'm glad I graduated from university years before idiots like you showed up.

same

>Try to put forward a paper

Oh you mean you don't actually attend higher education? Funny.

There is no single way to 'appreciate literature'. Deconstruction is one of many.

Anyone have the image of the reddit stemfag who complained about his leftist professor giving him a C on a paper due to it's politics, but then he posts the paper and it ends up being complete shit?

I really have to wonder if this is the case for 90% of people who bitch about leftist professors giving them shit grades.

A Seperate Peace was pretty gay though

What is he complaining about anyway when he passed?

A Separate Peace is fantastically faggy and I fucking hated having to read it. It's the one novel from my high school curriculum that I have no desire to revisit. I'd rather reread To Kill A Mockingbird before that shit.

tbqh jewish professors are sometimes brilliant

>politics
>banal shit
m8it's ok to be apolitical but it literally shapes every aspect of your life... but I guess some autistic engineer math is more important

why I left english and joined cog sci desu senpai

if something isn't true, it shouldn't hurt you. especially in the realm of pure thought, ffs

>>"I chose to be an English major because I enjoy reading"
Hate to bite your ankles, m8, but this is the only reason anyone should study English. It's not fuckin scripture.

>>classmates unironically like Rupi Kaur
i want off this ride.

You're probably just an idiot/lying

It's pretty fun to just take the leftist professor's idea xe tried to shove down your throat in class to an obviously insane extreme and write a paper with that as a thesis.

My lecturer cut the sides of this poster and talked for 40 minutes about patriarchy in the great Gatsby and Hollywood because the men are in a position of power by being above the helpless female in the poster despite the full poster showing two other females besides them:)))))))

>yfw the professor takes your insane extreme paper seriously and tries to implement it

/pol/ needs to leave

I was close to applying for an MA in Cultural Studies because I'm interested in how technology affects culture. I didn't because I was worried it'd end up in too much discussion about minority issues and gender politics. My interests are more aligned with questions concerning how perception of reality differs when you use the internet every day. In the end I chose Communication Studies.

Reckon I made a good decision?

They are always these brilliant old treasures, latin teachers. =)

Well it depends. Do you learn Greek and Latin?

Also, thinking about enrolling to the St. John's school but I'm afraid it'll shoot off my chances of grad school because it's not really specialized

Marxist criticism is passé now, isn't it? Literally never encountered a professor advocating it.

Majoring in English Lit and Creative Writing.
What the hell kind of uni did you go to if that's the case? I go to one of the most notably liberal unis in England and we're still taught a bilateral approach.

Stereotypes always have a grain of truth in them.

It is going to vary from college to college, but speaking from my experience (and I tried so hard to be magnanimous, receptive, open-minded) my english department at an Australian university was full of hamfisted critical theorists and chardonnay leftists. Only the "I love Shakespeare" types provided some kind of counterweight. I also appreciated the avowed Marxists a lot by the end because they at least could honestly explain their arguments.

One of my professors actually made us watch Anita Sarkeesian videos during the Gamergate controversy.

Because low GPA literally stops you from being hired which makes everything you did useless. If you don't get a job straight out of college it only gets harder from that point forward because there's blatant age discrimination in almost every field where people who are older but lack first hand experience are seen as if they have deep black marks to be avoided.

>literally shapes every aspect of your life
Retard

>the I bullshitted my way thru critical theory and ended up with a B+ and didn't retain anything I learned

It also helped that I would flirt with professor :3 seriously I don't know why so many gays complain

You're an idiot.

>"I chose to be an English major because I enjoy reading"
Why else major in English :^)

>doing English as minor
>Need one more credit to complete
>Sign up for Shakespearean theatre course
>Did drama and Shakespeare in high school so this would be an easy A
>The instructor is a failed actor whom I've seen in various small TV roles
>She announces that we are doing Midsummer Night's Dream at the end of term
>Familiar with the play and begrudgingly accept
>There was a second class that she also taught that
>Our class was logistics and the Lovers
>The second class was set design and the Mechanicals
>Both classes never met throughout the 4 months of rehearsals and planning
>Finally arrive at the day of the first performance and actually see the other class
>Waiting backstage for the Lovers sequence and watching the Mechanicals
>They've completely scrapped Bottoms aspect of the play in favour of a conversation between two Mechanicals about how hard it is to design a play
>One obsese and extremely flamboyant gay guy starts breaking open mason jars and starts lamenting all the while finishing every sentence with "#hashtag"
>A gothlike girl walks into the stage and begins to complain about the government and how they are attempting to keep fairies down
>Fat gay jumps up and starts yelling out #REVOLUTION
>Scene ends
>Transition to Lovers scene
>I was playing Demitrius and because of what happened before I forgot most of my lines

I wish I was making this up. During the after party I asked the instructor what was the point of that and she told me that she wanted it included because it would excite crowd.

Nobody on Veeky Forums has a degree

Yeah a professor is much deeper in debt

This is why I majored in Biology instead of English. It just doesn't make any sense to major in English in the current academic climate even if you love it.

I also major in biology instead of english.

Majored in neuroscience

shut the fuck up and go back to /pol/

literally the only place where this even remotely happens is in dedicated classes for particular types of criticism.

>OP takes classes about critical race theory to complain about there not being enough white people probably

>Everyone who has an opinion or post outside of my own viewpoint is automatically from /pol/.
Not an argument.

noice miniature, i love them.

Fuck off to reddit

I wouldn't even minded a decent Marxist interpretation of Shakespeare but I was lucky if my lecturers knew how to pronounce interpretation.