Pick up a book

>walk into room
>notice a book sitting on the table
>instantly pass out, getting a concussion from hitting my head on the stone floor
I'm such a brainlet, I want to die.

I fuking hate this. Gonna drown this ooa booga worth nothing two bit trash brain into water someday for good.

I want to read but these stupid trash brains are literally falling asleep every time I try to read a fucking book and I don't know what to do

>be book
>be picked up by some white ghost with a head deformity
>he instantly passes out
>he wakes up and posts about it on some Chinese textbook exchange marketplace website
>repeat daily

Pace around the room while you read, feels good man

Just hold your book in one hand as you read, and put the other on a hot stove.

read out loud, its what i do

I fall asleep each time I touch a book, pretty handy desu

maybe you just have adhd

happens to me too, but only when im actually sleepy.
This was pretty funny during my read of the Iliad, I imagined different fates for the soldiers and i kind of enjoy it even if i had to read the same line 3 times

I was the same and was able to cure it.

I was a big reader when I was younger but stopped reading for a while. All I did was force myself to keep going as much as possible. After a few weeks the sleepiness was nearly gone.

It was so bad just a month ago where I would be 100% awake and the second I opened a book would feel deathly sleepily. Last week I read 100 pages straight of a fairly difficult book while laying in bed so yea just keep forcing it and it should pass.

The second I walk into a book store or a library, I immediately have to take a crap. Anyone else like this?

you’re probably fat and gay, and stupid and ugly

Yes my brother. It was especially bad when I was a kid in high school and browsing the school library. Worst ever was shitting three times at a marvelous old used book store full of estate book collections, usually deep on some anthropological topic.

this, same experience
Just grab something big that requires paying attention and taking notes; I recommend Herodotus

my thread the other day about taking things too literally was unironic

Thing is I've read a lot in 2 years and this keeps happening on hourly basis and I keep being dumb as a fucking brick

I failed to read.
I just picked up PC and started reading fucking Veeky Forums
S.

Reading is mostly just practice.

People these days train their brains on the internet. This gives them lovely little stimuli roughly every five seconds, which they get addicted to.

So read more, and surf less. That will train your brain to deal with a lower level of stimulation.

Don't try to read if you're really tired - go to sleep :)

Don't try to read if you're really preoccupied - go for a walk :)

If you still have trouble, try finding books that need less effort, so you don't get discouraged and just give up. There are many "easier" books which still have value.

Try books of aphorisms which are just bite-sized pieces.

Or try something like Montaigne's or Bacon's essays which are very short, self-contained pieces, just a couple of pages on a particular topic. You can read one of those pretty much "in one breath".

Memories of me crapping at a used book store are now flooding back. Thanks user, good times, that was a cool store.

This. I only got through the first line of Swann's Way yesterday

I know its hard to say but if I limit internet access to 1 hour a day and read for at least 6-8 hours a day how long will it take me to see long term changes

I know its hard to say but if I limit internet access to 1 hour a day and read for at least 6-8 hours a day how long will it take me to see long term changes
how many years will it take me to completely reverse the conditioning?

Not long to get a groove going but Reading comprehension takes years of reading to improve and IQ can't really be improved

>tfw can unironically only read a bunch when drunk

What do?

liver failure

I can't say what would be a reasonable timetable to set yourself because I don't know anything about you.

Don't force yourself to read huge amounts at first. Just a couple of hour good productive reading a day is worth a lot. As you get better and enjoy it more you will want to do it more, assuming you actually have the time available.

>IQ can't be improved.
>Brain development stops at 23
I should just get it over with and jump off the bridge tomorrow morning

Also, it's best to do things early in the morning if you want to really put your best mental energy into them.

Most people try to read an hour or two before bed at night and that's fine.

But if you can set aside 1-2 hours early after you get up each day to read, that is better.

There's this guy at my library whos there every day and all he does is sleep and nobody forces him to leave because he's well dressed and has an apple computer. If that is you I just want you to know you have a short time to live before I have dispatched with your miserable existence my good man.

I second Zoolander’s advice

Few weeks to a couple months, I imagine.

You'll dispatch WITH his miserable existence? Murder suicide?

youtube.com/watch?v=ROFsV18qrdQ

I managed to read 15 pages in 6 hours and I retained nothing. Why

Soy, aspartame, fluoride, xenoestrogens, BPA etc.