Coffein/Coffee

It's the only way I can force myself to work out, study, or stay positive at my shitty retail job.
I love coffee and the smell of coffee, although I've bought some pre workout samples to see how that goes.

So coffein has no negative effects on training/gains?
In moderation I mean

I never noticed any, assuming you drink enough water

Coffee is for swampbreathed hipsters and nu-males.

Drink some russian caravan tea or earl grey.

I love tea, but nu male hipsters are exactly the type of person that drinks tea and not coffee

Also I find Japanese gyokuro or mate tea pump me up more than anything

not in my world of caricatures and strawmen

nu-males drink coffer constantly to fuel their late night gaming sessions and twitch.tv viewing

Nu males hate gaming though because muh sexism

this, fuck coffee and everyone who drinks it. Do you know how fucking dumb you all look scouting out every room you enter looking for a pot to make your shitty ass hot bean water?"MAN OH MAN WHERE DAT COFFEE POT AT MY DUDE?"

Some of you even have the gall to try to shill your shitty drink to your guests after every fucking meal. Who really wants fucking coffee after dinner?!

What's even worse is the lot of you that feel superior for drinking the shit straight. "Look at me! I love BEANS so fucking much that I CRUSH the fuckers and turn them into a DRINK! And then I claim I'm better than all the other BEANDRINKERS by chastising them over adding normal shit to their bean water to make it stomach-able!"

Fuck Coffee

I've heard mixed things about caffeine. Some people say it increases your metabolism and others say it can lead to gut fat because it raises your cortisone/cortisol levels or some shit.

>*chuckles lightly* I'm sorry m'lady, but did you just ask me how much "cream" or "sugar" I wanted in my coffee? I'll let you know the exact amount: Zero. 0 spoons of sugar, and 0 servings of cream. A true man doesn't seek any form of pleasure from his beverages. Such folly is for children, and frankly I'm offended you'd even entertain the idea of a gentlesir such as myself consuming "cream" or "sugar." Excuse me, I have a cold shower to continue