Delayed mires realisations

Last one reached the limit. Here's one from my gainsless skelly days.

>be me, 16y/o KV
>friend brings these 2 hot sluts to his house after we were having a few drinks at like 3AM
>they have a few drinks with him and I
>friend tells me they want to make out with me
>I don't chicken out
>have 3 way kiss with these 2 sloots
>I'm overjoyed
>go inside with them
>"have fun user" my mate says
>they continue to make out with me on a couch
>"user do you have any stds?"
>"Ummm no I've never been with a girl"
>"Woah so you've never even had a hand job or blowjob?"
>"take off your shirt user" as they put their hands down my pants
>as I'm about to take it off I remember my chest and back acne
>"uh-uhmm maybe another time, I barely know you girls"
>Friend ends up fucking both of them while I sit outside on my own
>never see either of them again

Pic related. The one on the left (our left), the other one I couldn't find on fb

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=pdKzTlLrDmY
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

No offense intended but holy shit you people are legitimately autistic. and i say this as a kisslesss virgin myself

I never had a chance cause of friends doing more sausage fests than parties not to say girls in my former major were uggo as fuck add that to being a total shrek in high school. Whenever i get mired nowadays, i eyefuck girls and milfs sometimes until they feel uncomfortable.

holy shit breh you fucked up. the left girl is a real cutie

>Be me, kissless, handholdless 17 year old virgin high school senior
>6'3, 210 lb. Maybe 12% body fat. Face is spitting image of young Matt LeBlanc, or so I'm told.
>Great genetics--older brother is former state wrestling champion but I'm just an autistic nerd.
>Obsessed with working out and playing video games because it's easier than interacting with people in real life.
>Going to mall one Saturday to buy clothes.
>Walking up to the entrance I notice a circle of teenage girls my age huddled outside the double doors. Most are pretty cute, 7/10 on average.
>They see me approaching. Actually, I'm just trying to walk past them without making eye contact.
>As I walk closer, they start to whisper to each other.
>I get to the entrance. They're standing maybe 10 feet away.
>"Nice!" one of them blurts out boldly in my direction, giggling and blushing.
>The others all look at her and giggle.
>I make eye contact with her. She looks back at me.
>Time slows to a halt.
>I look at each of them and then they look at each other. None of them say a word. Several of them start to hold their breath, still giggling.
>"Is she fucking making fun of me?" I wonder to myself. "Who the fuck is this fucking cunt? Who the fuck stands around outside a mall talking shit to random strangers with her cunty little friends? What the fucking fuck?"
>Sudden rage consumes my soul, mixing with social anxiety.
>I need to put this fucking bitch in her place! Punch her in that snide face of hers. Scream at her to go fuck herself at the very least.
>Too scared/socially anxious to say anything back to her.
>Break eye contact. Open door to mall. Awkwardly step inside and walk quickly away.
>I hear them burst out laughing as I'm walking away.

5 years later I told my first real girlfriend about how girls used to pick on me all the time and she said "They were trying to flirt with you, you idiot."

Another 5 years passed before I started kinda believing her.

>shitthatneverhappened.com

Literally nobody on this board talks about lifting anymore.

>(our left)

as opposed to...?

holy shit she's fuckin beautiful
you really messed up

Their left, you fucking mung bean.

Well, if you were standing inside of the picture frame and looking forward from their perspective, our left would be their right. But I too find OP's clarification unnecessary given that we are obviously not doing this.

Feels good that you don't believe me tbqh

>be me, KV 16 year old
>at a house party
>everyone is having a great time
>a girl I knew with a fat ass sits on my lap
>"Hello user! Want to have some fun?"
>I sperg out and push her of my lap and go into the kitchen
>Never speak to her again

lol made me kek

>college
>20 year old virgin
>friends qt younger sister starts attending my college and she is recently single
>party with her a bunch and text occasionally the first month or so of the school year
>told her once that I've never smoked weed but kinda wanted to try it
>one night she tells me to come over so she can take my "weed virginity"
>psych myself out thinking I'll somehow get caught and get kicked out of school and lose my job
>bail on her
>she doesn't talk to me as much or want to party with me as much after that

My friends think she wanted me but i didn't really think so. I was a skinny lanky awkward weirdo who somehow had a fair amount of friends because I must have been somewhat fun and I thought she was way out of my league. That's all I got.

cmon dude you are a pussy

Liberals

Something similar to this happened to me, so i know how you feel.

Does anyone know what someone should do or say when something like that happens?

>feels good to be a pussy
Mate...

>Be me, 20 year old KV who spends all his time in the gym and never talks to anyone outside of it
>Get invited to house party thrown by black gym bro friends who live in my quad
>Walk in. Look around. Feel awkward. Never know what to say or who to talk to.
>See 9/10 qt black girl with corn rows I've had a crush on for six months. Friend of black gym bro friends. Near identical twin of Alicia Keys. I've only spoken to her one or twice.
>She's sitting on a couch with her girlfriends. Sees me and smiles. Stands up. Walks over to me.
>"Hi, user! How are you today?"
>"Y-you too!" I exclaim
>She takes this in without flinching
>"Hey user, I have a headache. Could you massage my temples for me?"
>Get confused.
>She has all these girl friends here with her. Why is she bothering me with this shit?
>She leads us over to a couch on the other side of room. Sits next to me and leans back into me
>"Here, just massage my head slowly, user."
>"Uh, s-sure!"
>Awkwardly rub her head. Heart beating fast. Nervous.
>No clue what I'm doing.
>Feel like incredible Hulk sitting next to this 5'3, 115 lb femlet. Squeezing her head too hard. Rubbing temples from behind like I'm grating a block of cheese. Palming her head like a basketball in my 6'4 otter hands.
>People stare at us. I feel super self conscious.
>Is this all just a game to humiliate me?
>Start to sweat a little.
>Realize I'm "massaging" her flesh like I'd tenderize meat. Possibly bursting capillaries. Force self to lighten up a bit.
>She doesn't say anything.
>I realize she's looking at the TV in the distance. Some BET show.
>How long do I have to do this for?
>Realize I could be alone in my dorm room playing Halo
>Realize I could be alone posting on the internet
>Her girlfriends call out to her "Hey, come look at this."
>"Uh, that's enough user."
>She leaves me and starts talking to them.
>Last I see of her for the night.

I still run into her on campus here and there and she always acts super happy to see me. What do?

You didn't say anything? How fucking long were you sitting there

kek, bro, mahh life!!

bumpin

fuck wrong pic

Someone post the pasta where the guy is eating inside his car in Burger King

>at college cafeteria
>reheating lunch in microwave
>qt comes over
>'hey, I just wanted to say you have a really nice ass'
>'thanks, I grew it myself'
>ding
>lunch is ready
>take it out
>leave

>TFW I give off the bad boy look/vibe but am the total opposite

>tfw women are intimidated by me and avoid so they don't drop their spaghetti (those that do drop it completely, i.e. Walking into a wall or spilling drink into their skirt)

>TFW the very few girls that were forced to talk to me by some chance, like a project or networking event; they'd see right through my looks and figure out I'm a inexperienced nervous wreck and from then on treat me like garbage

You know the dudes on social media that girls wet themselves over? The mixed black guys? I'm one of them. You may say it's a blessing and it is, but I don't know how to regain my masculinity and live up to their expectations. This was before I started lifting a month ago

Advice Veeky Forums please.

>I give off the bad boy look
>women are intimidated by me and avoid so they don't drop their spaghetti
I'm sure that's why they avoid you...

This isn't a circle jerk

My question is how do you live up to expectations and embrace your manhood like nature because I'm a nervous wreck

Top fucking kek.

>inexperienced nervous wreck and from then on treat me like garbage

This is true. Fucked it up with a girl awfully which I had a genuine chance with. (now going out with my friend) But now she knows the real me she actively treats me like shit. Ignores me in group conversations and won't look me in the eye. Going to confront her soon

She's too cute to be a slut desu

Just smile, you stupid cunt.
But not in an autistic way.
Smile in a smirk/amused way.

Well, that's what got me through, at least.
It made me seem approachable, or at least that's what I think, since girls did approach me after a few situations like that.

Just stop being nervous. Relax. Don't take anything seriously. Be able to laugh at yourself in a non-retarded and non-pathetic way.

Be gentle and act happy, smile a lot... just not like a creep.
When you smile a lot, women tend to feel invited to approach you, and you leave a good impression.

Until I learned that, people would always tell me - after getting to know me - that my facial expressions looked like I wanted to beat someone up and stuff like that.

>go to a club with my bro
>we sit at the bar
>i wear a black tshirt/black pants
>feel a hand on my shoulder
>it's a blonde cutie
>"hi, my friend ober there wants you to know that your muscles look nice in black"
>she leaves
>look over, her friend doesn't even look at me
>still it's a mire right?
>talk to a friend a few days later
>she says it was probably a prank and the utie lost a bet
>mfw i realise she made fun of me because i wore all black and had no muscles

This is so cruel, i get that girls won't hit on me or anything, but at least leave me alone and don't make fun of me on top of completly ignoring me.

Alright, I fucking hate Buzzfeed but they nailed it here.

youtube.com/watch?v=pdKzTlLrDmY

but what if they ARE making fun of me and I smirk? that would be even more retarded.

Post a pic and i'll tell you what's what

lel

This.

Post pic of you in said outfit. Crop out face if you want. We're just gonna evaluate whether you look like you lift with clothes on.

This is all to help you out, matey. No one's judging you just to bully.

>I give off the bad boy look/vibe but am the total opposite
You probably just look like a school shooter so they are scared, and when they realize you're too much of a beta to shoot up a school they realize they can treat you like crap

I personally like to tease/act awkward my man. Like lay her head back onto your lap and look over top of her, be like "I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing" and have a big smile, laugh, etc.

Have fun with life/girls and they usually love you for your honesty/silliness. Just never stop being approachable

dont be harsh guys

...

>flirting with a pajeet
>they nailed it here
Sure buddy

Good meme

You act like scat fetishes don't exist

Either smile at her or smile and say something kinda sarcastic but light like "I know" then keep acting casual and move inside. I would recommend never approaching an entire group of girls if you are alone but sounds like you have bretty gub genetics. I have literally responded to a similar situation with "I know" then saw the girl at a later time and we chatted for a bit then I got her number, though you are genetically more chad than me

you're a dumbass
you're way more of a dumbass if you think confronting her will do anything but make the situation worse and very awkward with your friends

then who gives a fuck you're losing either way

...

...

>be 5.7 manlet gook.
>start lifting, getting big, feels good.
>pretty big for asians guys.
>parents didn't like it.
>whatever I keep going.
>Asian girls don't mirin, I'm not into them anyways.
>other girls who like gooks like lean k-fag muscles.
>no gf, whatever I keep lifting.
>guys mirin hard
>mfw

>16y/o KV
>parents away for weekend
>17y/o sister and her friend are home, walking around in underwear
>"grab *friends* boob, user!"
>"yeah user, grab my boobs"
>gets close to me and starts rubbing my leg
>"no"
>go to bedroom and play minecraft

My sister explained to me 3 years later how she talked her friend into taking my virginity in an effort to get rid of my shyness. I didn't end up having sex until 19

One on the right looks like one of those girls that seems sweet/nice but turns out to be a total sl00t and stuff.

I feel like this site is full of fuck highschoolers jesus christ what am I doing here.....

r9k is where all the post high schoolers congregate to complain about life and regrets, try there instead

That's really weird but at least your sis is a bro.

She wants to go out clubbing with me now that I'm 20 and have no friends, probably to winggirl me

She used to treat me badly when I was younger which I attribute a lot of my shyness and low self-esteem to, but these days yeah she's quite bro-tier

>lived in ghetto area
>went to ghetto school
>became essentially a hybrid nigger in a white guys skin
>move to richer suburb area
>walk ghetto
>talk ghetto when im not paying attention
>have constant scornful look because looking like a bitch would get you beaten up
>people constantly looking at me and then immediately double taking to make sure i'm not about to cross the street to attack them like an aggro'd video game character
>weeks of this happening cause me to become extremely hostile, being out of my element makes me feel like shit
>snap at everything
>walking around in shopping center, getting new shoes
>maybe 6-7 girls and a handful of dues sitting around on benches, just fucking around, all highschool aged
>earphones in, listening to loud ass giga-nigga tier drill rap
>walk by them, group locks eyes with me
>scowl at them, jaw clenched, nose curled, lip up, full on look disgust
>they say something and giggle, didn't hear it over music
>take earbud out, one of them does the "come here" motion and giggles
>like some sort of melanin enriched arnold, i've been on a diet of nothing but fat assed mulatto girls and latinas
>these plank-bodied lumberjack overshirt wearing white girls enrage me for some reason
>"fuck outta here bitch, don't be doin that shit to me tellin me what to do"
>hear that ear grating whiny "ohhhmmigod!" but like times 7 all at the same time
>that entitled upper-class woman whorecry makes me even madder
>"i said FUCK outta here HO"
>spit at them
>one guy starts getting up
>turn and step at him right quick and he flinches
>"yea, sit your ass down boy"
>walk off, go into shoe store
>see cops talking to them across parking lot
>not sure if they're trying to find me, cut through back of shopping center and walk home
>not only did i miss the chance to maybe fuck a highschooler i missed the chance to maybe fuck 7
>also probably got my description on a board somewhere of "BOL: rowdy chimps" in the shopping center

youp keg

>whorecry

isnt there a webm of this?

alpha as fuck

>no offense

kek

No homo but if I were gay my thing would be masculine Asian men
I will never understand women

not that i know of? if there is please post

tell me you have a badass drill playlist on youtube and are willing to share

fuckin hate that orange county girl accent
"so liiiiiiike yesterdaaaaaay like me and my like frieeeeeends"

I think this was a stage she was going through coz she's had 2 long term relationships since this happened. So she calmed down a lot

waiting op

Are you dumb OP? Like, really dumb to the bone kind of faggot?

Lmao. I was super self conscious because I had shocking body acne, was skelly and milky white back then. Like 55kg soaking wet. I'd still stab 2008 me in the eye if a had a chance though. Only ended up getting a bj and sex 3 years later

fucking kek

Underrated

They wanted your dick, just fly thru that. Damn you missed out a threesome.

>i've went out with some girls but nothing really clicked, just decided to push things back while i work on my career; she went into several relationships throughout college that went sore one way or another; being a good friend i hear her out and all that sappy shit
>even though she has a pretty nice ass don't really feel any attraction to her at all; pretty content with just having her as a friend to keep the autism at bay and to have someone to talk to about guy/girl stuff and life in general
>was going to just hangout with her for a couple of drinks and watch some shows to relax, she out of nowhere says "honestly (my name), you're the only guy i can really trust! you're the only friend i'd trust to sleep in bed with me"
>meant a lot to me but got kinda weirded out, figured it was just her being autistic and just said i really appreciated her sincerity and went full out with the jokes and good time and she really seemed to enjoy it all a lot.
>come later we got both drunk and a little high, and she asked if i wanted to sleep in bed, as this point i dropped my mental autism since i could not for the life of me understand what she was asking of me
> internal monologue: "no way she expected something from me, i'm not exactly handsome or all that great; don't let your dick do the thinking"
>say sure and just literally went to bed
>had a ton of fucking trouble sleeping that night since i could not figure out what her fucking intentions were, just racking my brain. She didn't do anything either (like touch me or anything) so i had literally nothing to fucking go on.
>fell asleep and accidentally rolled over to her side at side (not use to sleeping on a massive bed), from what she told me she had to hold one of my hair to stop me from rolling into her
>felt embarrassed and apologized profusely

cont.

to this day it still makes me physically uncomfortable to recall that event. I probably should've just asked if she wanted something to happen, but it just honestly did not enter my thick skull.

try and beat that Veeky Forums

Real shit my nigga

>Hello user! want to have some fun?
this is how women speak and act

You provide a great primary insight into the nigger mind. Just chill dude. But that was alpha as fuck.

I figured you were tall, nothing bad about that
I got a guy at my gym who is abit taller than me so im guessing 6'2'' maybe and he is looking awesome so you can do it
How long have you been lifting?

Lifting seriously for three years now. My progress doesn't seem impressive, but i started pretty underweight at 154 lb. So getting to 205 this spring was kind of an achievement for me.

Its progress atleast.
If you feel like its taking too long/not going as planned then back to the drawing board
What are you doing wrong? what are you doing right?
What needs improving?

are you from berlin?

It's the one interesting fact about me lol. When I got to school the following Monday I wouldn't shut up about having made out with 2 chicks. The girls at school caught wind of it and I was rejected by every single one I asked out because they thought I was a big mouthed man slut. I was fucking retarded at 16. That friend never invited me to one of his fuck fests again because I blabbed to everyone at school that he had a 3 way and that caused him to strike out with every chick at school too.

Feels pretty good to have had something this unbelievable happen to me lmao. I should call up that friend and thank him for knowing such huge sluts

I found the other chick. Pic related.

post pic
>inb4 dark shades and soul patch

>be 19
>at my friend's summer house with other 2 good friends (there's 4 of us lads)
>it's summer
>friend's sister (she's 27) is throwing a birhtday party there the next day
>mostly my friend's relatives at the outdoor party
>get drunk with my buddies
>starts to get dark outside
>a wild hambeast joins the party
>she's straight outta college and keeps telling everyone how college years were the best hears of her life
>she is being very loud and obnoxious
>gives me an eye from time to time
>finally she sits next to me on a big garden bench
>everyone else are chatting, drunk and some one is playing a guitar
>she is obv into me and fliring
>too autustic to tell her to fuck off because she might be a relative to my good friend
>she starts feeling my biceps with her sausage rolls
>think this is too much and pretend i passed out from booze
>she puts her hands into my shorts and feels my lower abs
>too late to do anything now so i lay there half-dead
>screaming internally as she starts to touch my pubes
>friend finally sees whats going on and basically had to use a crowbar to et her away from me
>still pretend im passed out since i feel disgusted by what happened and it would be embarrasing to let everyone think i let that happen willingly
>friends drag me up the stairs to the bed inside the summer house (was like 240lbs bulkin at the time)

>mfw i think back on that

>No Homo
>Veeky Forums
Why you got to lie?

The solution to your problem is obvious. Be confident. Learn to deal with women. Bang sluts. Treat women like shit. That is how you become the guy they really want.