BURNED

you took it up the ass for some heroin?

Next time just get some lidocaine cream and get it over with.

no. it was a morphine overdose. i got extremely dizzy and passed out but didn't really think much of it until a few hours later when i noticed blood in the toilet after i peed (it didnt come from my dick because i wiped my ass after and the tissue was covered in blood). went to ER and they didn't really seem concerned about it

disclaimer: i do not pee sitting down like a girl. i was only sitting down because it takes ages to pee on opiates

you sound like a fruitcake lad

You play with gasoline?
Can you spell "stupid" or do you have to look it up? Do you ask your phone?

my intentions were good but i was under the influence of buckfast + budweiser + xanax

>bored
>find some zippo fluid lying around
>notice my budweiser cans on the floor
>coldest month of the year
>have a great idea (actually i just remembered
something i read on reddit)
>decide im going to invent a cheap portable heater so i can hand them out to the homeless
>take budweiser can
>pour some zippo fluid in it
>set fire to it
>the flame doesn't even last a minute without relighting
>conclude v1.0 is a failure
>get to work on v2.0
>take another can
>cut the top off
>fill it with scrunched up paper
>pour zippo fluid in it
>set fire to it
>the flame isnt so good
>figure its not getting enough oxygen
>puncture some holes near the top
>light it up again
>flame seem better but it seems buried by the paper
>try to turn the paper over
>hot hot hot
>throw it up in the air
>lands on my thigh

pic related: its v1.0

v2.0

>ive OD'd and bled from my ass and was sent away within 10 minutes.

This was a hospital in the UK?

yeah. they checked my blood pressure and said it wasnt a big deal unless i was old or it was a lot of blood. they said to see my gp if it persisted but it never

definitely 2nd degree, possibly 3rd

1st degree burns only leave a red mark, not a scab or wound.

How loudly are you screaming?

doesnt even really hurt that much to be honest. i only feel it when it rubs against be clothing or i apply pressure to it

Not a good thing -- the nerves have been cooked.

well shit

Yeah dude that's about as bad as it gets, you're really going to have to get that seen by a doctor or shits going to get real bad real quick

what's a plausible lie I can tell them that doesn't make me look like a dumbass?

Also, what happens if I just do nothing (except )

Go to a doctor dumbass

>"what's a plausible lie I can tell them that doesn't make me look like a dumbass?"
you think you're going to fool some guy with 20+ years experience with human stupidity

you are a faggot and everyone here telling GO TO THE DUCTOR OMFGGG U GON DIE are retards too

wash it and alcohol to avoid infection

it will start to hurt really soon, be sure to dont cry.

-poor cold water on it
-neutralize with solution with basic ph, like baking soda in water
-put creams for burns, like pic
-put cream/ointment to moisturize, like hydromol or some biafine
-when going out, put sun screen, like spf 50

You are literally mentally retarded

holy fuck read a wikipedia article on 3rd degree burns

I could tell them I was refilling a zippo lighter that leaked? But I'm not sure I'll bother anyway unless it turns purplish.

I forgot to mention that it happened like 2-3 days ago. The pictures were taken just before I made this thread.

I'm autistic and I have drug problems. I (unintentionally) OD on a regular basis. I'll probably be dead in a few years anyway.

finish yourself off quickly
the longer you're alive the greater your chances of doing some Darwin-award tier shit and bringing even more dishonor to your famiry.

This is what it looks like now.

Don't lie, just say you burned yourself with a lighter accidentally. Who fucking cares what they think, you need medical attention.

Literally gangrenous, you need a doctor immediately.

You're mom

what a comeback

Lol that gangrene. Might as well put a quote for your obituary now

>i gave myself a burn in a retarded way that needs immediate medical attention
>let me post a thread about it instead lol

Not gangrene, tell everyone to fuck off

Clean it with rubbing alcohol, then coat in vaseline (make sure your hands are clean) before wrapping in gauze. Several layers of toilet paper and duck tape will work too in a tight pinch. Replace every 8-12 hours

This guy is literally trying to kill you.

do you know what gangrene looks like?

It's 4am where I am and this is all the medical equipment I have access to for the time being. what do?

>tissue paper
>tissue paper tube
>diprobase ointment
>asda receipt (doesn't stick to flesh like tissue does)
>synergi (contact lens solution)

>(and bubble wrap)

Wtf are you trying to pull op. Why did you rip all the toilet paper off the roll?

emergency rooms are open at 4am you dolt.

I initially wrapped it around my leg but it slipped off and some of it stuck to my flesh.

Its going to stick, especially with the vaseline. The gel is meant to provide a hydrophobic cushion between the wound and the gauze.

You need to wrap it pretty thick if you are using toilet paper, and you'll need to finish off with duck tape if you want to be able to move around with it on. Really dude, go out and get the gauze

what about ointment instead of vaseline?

OK. I washed it with some saline solution and then applied a layer of ointment to the bubble wrap and duct taped it to my leg?

looks like some abrasion type shit my dooood

This thread is the most retarded thing I have ever seen.

Fair

>then applied a layer of ointment to the bubble wrap and duct taped it to my leg

Don't wrap it with bubble wrap, that material doesn't allow the wound to breath what-so-ever, and will likely encourage infection.

I would personally disinfect the wound (which you already did) and then just let it air out and dry. If you practice basic hygiene (a shower a day) and keep the area clean, the chances of infection are insignificant for a wound of that size. If in a couple days the area around the wound starts to redden, go to the doc (it's infected and you need some anti-biotics)

This thread doesn't belong on Veeky Forums

Medicine is a science. Biology is a science.

Fuck off.

I should have this in about ~3 hours: amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B001E1D3WQ/

Is that good enough?

>amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B001E1D3WQ/

Yup, that's perfect if you're choosing to dress the wound. Once a decent scab has formed on the wound, you won't really need the dressings. by the looks of it will take around 4 days give or take to form.

damn, i compulsively want to pick thsoe wounds

>Medicine is a science
It really isn't.

Medical advice threads are bannable on Veeky Forums too.
enjoy your infection.

>"Define Medicine"
1. The science or practice of the diagnosis, treatment, and prevention of disease (in technical use often taken to exclude surgery).

2. The branches of medical science that deal with nonsurgical techniques.

>practice of the diagnosis
good thing they're doing the science part here and not the practice part
:^)

>asking Veeky Forums to help you with medical procedures

There are quicker ways to commit suicide OP.

3rd degree is if you bled, i think. But I'm no doctor. :/

I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he meant antiseptic

That is going to hurt like hell in a few hours, might as well get to the doctor before that business starts. Also that needs to be cleaned, better get a doctor to do it.

Medical research is partly science, but most of medicine is just people applying knowledge rather than create knowledge. It's like engineering, but with human bodies. Biology is obviously a science, but this shit is just medical advice.

Had a 2nd a degree burn just a month ago.
Didn't look like this to be honest. This looks just weird.
I'm guessing it's 2nd b or even 3rd because it looks white.
Either way, will need probably a month to heal, and even then that place will feel sinsitive.

If its 3rd it won't completely heal on its own.

Srs just go to a doctor and tell them you burned yourself with lighter fluid. They aren't going to care about the circumstances if you just say "it was an accident...". Only reason they'll question you is to make sure there's nothing medically relevant.

They deal with much stupider problems on the daily, this they most likely won't even bat an eye at.

first, why the fuck would you believe anything you read on reddit? Second, why the fuck did you want to make a "cheap portable heater" so you could "hand them out to the homeless?"
>oh gee thanks for this empty beer can filled with lighter fluid, you're such a kind soul

are you retarded or something?

Says the autist on a japanese cartoon board talking about math and science.

Recursion incoming!!!