What was this guy's problem?

Tell me how a dead man can regret anything

Either/Or

are you that dense, that's not the point, you're taught that you will regret it with the implication of eternal damnation; he's christian, everyone he knows is christian, anything not deemed christian is oppressed, etc

this is being applied to a person that's alive, before they make any decision, they're apparently going to regret any decision they make no matter what they do regardless of whether or not it's entirely true

If you hang yourself there will be a minute or two before you pass out where you are squirming are thinking "fuck I shouldn't have tied my hands behind my back"

But you still understand what he is conveying, don't you, you pedantic autist

*holds up spork*

Absolutely based.

Autism.

...

"Without daring, then, to appeal to Lessing, without daring definitely to refer to him as my guarantor, without putting anyone under obligation to want, because of Lessing's renown, most dutifully to understand or to claim to have understood something that brings the one who understands into a dubious relation to my lack of renown, which certainly is just as repelling as Lessing's renown is compelling- I now intend to present something that I shall, what the deuce, ascribe to Lessing, without being certain that he would acknowledge it, something that I in teasing exuberance could easily be tempted to want to foist upon him as something he said, although not directly, something for which in a different sense I in admiration could enthusiastically wish to dare to thank him, something that in turn I ascribe to him with proud restraint and self-esteem, just out of generosity, and then again something that I fear will offend or bother him by linking his name to it. One rarely finds an author who is such pleasant company as Lessing. And why is that? I think it is because he is so sure of himself. All this banal and easy association of someone exceptional with someone less exceptional- one is a genius, a master, the other an apprentice, a messenger, a day laborer, etc.- is prevented here. If I wanted to be Lessing's follower by hook or by crook, I could not; he has prevented it. Just as he himself is free, so, I think, he wants to make everyone free in relation to him, declining the exhalations and impudence of the apprentice, fearful of being made a laughingstock by the tutors, a parroting echo's routine reproduction of what has been said."
-Soren Kierkegaard

I like how much of a smug, whiny cunt he was